Dating Thread 148 - Having a Fab Time!

[TooOldForThis67]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

@shitwith Got distance set to 10 miles, the problem is that it doesn’t limit your own profile to just that area setting so people 100 odd miles away can still swipe you if they haven’t changed their location preferences.

@lifegoes Red flags galore there.

There was an interesting discussion on radio 4 the other week about likes on Tinder. A woman had been on there for a couple of years when she got a notification that in that time she'd had around 50,000 likes. Being a bit cynical, she paid for tinder gold to find out who all these men were.

But, once she paid, the number dropped considerably. To about 10,000, I think. And, most importantly, there were all outside her distance setting. Some were over 100 miles away.

They contacted Tinder who refused to comment. But the conclusion the programme came to was that tinder inflates the number of likes to make you look popular. And that paying to see who has liked you probably isn't worth doing as they're likely to be too far away or you would swipe left anyway for another reason.

@lifegoes I'd be out. I'm sorry, you can be forgetful. You can be dating other people. But lying. Nope. I'd be out.

I didn't see the red flags before in my last and it ended awfully. I feel like I can see them massively now. Rich

I think I still might go and meet him. But I have my guard VERY VERY HIGH and I might just call him out on the lot

Miracle I just don't get the lie. I hate lies. I despise them.

I'm so tempted to text him saying I thought you said you had a gig tonight in xxx

lifegoes either use him as a practice date or call it off.
I'd go for the later. Too much weirdness going on there

@lifegoes if it were me I'd ask 🤷. What have you got to lose? I hate liars. I don't care what the truth is, but don't lie. Especially about stupid things like that.

lifegoes how strange to blatantly lie. If it was me i'd send a message asking him to explain it and say I was pretty much done with meeting him. I wonder if he has some mental health issue

Unless he speaking to so many people he can't remember what lie he's told? Nope. I couldn't do it. I'd get back on the apps and find a replacement for Sunday 🤷

Asked. It got cancelled by the pub, often happens if not enough tickets sold 🤷🏻‍♀️

Feel like I'm over questioning things due to my ex here. But I've ever right to be cautious and question haven't I?!

With you miracle I have cut off family for lies told. I won't tolerate it from people who I haven't met yet.

I'll see how things go

I wouldn’t go now life

So many red flags. Unavailable phone. Lying already. It’s not a practice date now it’s a waste of your time. Get revenge swiping.

user He'll have a female mental issue if I find out he's lying about things that are not even important.

Unless he's going on a date and panicked about what to tell me. Not that I would care

Mia I always attract them 🤦🏻‍♀️

life,if he has other qualities you like,is local and seems to want what you do,i'd go. What does your gut say?

User I feel ok with going, but I think that's more to prove a point to myself. I need to get back out dating.

I can't see anything coming of it, we get on great. But lies nope.

@lifegoes I don't think you're over analysing things if I'm honest and that's a fair enough reason for plans to have changed. But you'd think he'd say 'oh pub cancelled the gig so I'm going out for a meal with family instead'. I'm glad you asked though! Go Sunday but be cautious

Oh also sometimes my phone says you have dialed an incorrect number when people call me (but they obviously haven't) but WhatsApp calls work fine. Just if you were worried about that 😊

Thanks miracle and everyone for your advice.

I honestly love this page, it's so lovely to have a network of people who are so supportive and keep me on track.

And if he is going on a date at least pick one 'story' unless he's a complete moron.

I've had an interesting couple of weeks. The old iron who got in touch....well we had 3 fabulous dates. Amazing chemistry. Laughs. Bantering over WhatsApp regularly. This week that cooled right down and we had a date set for tomorrow night. I started to think he's gone off me due to less texts. Put my big girl pants on and sent a nice message saying ... did he still want to do something. If not it's all good I can see freinds tomorrow night. Well He said he was dying to. V complimentary. I'm kinda hopeful this might be more than a shag....which was how this all started. A one night stand last summer. Never saw him again until we swiped right a few weeks back. Funny eh?

This sounds positive @supercali77 fingers crossed for you.

Sounds promising supercali and great that you already know you fancy him etc.

Well I’ve just called my date and it went to answerphone. He immediately sends a message on WhatsApp asking if I’m alright. I reply ‘I’m fine can you not speak?’
He replied ‘I can’t atm, what’s up?’
I reply ‘we have plans to meet, have you changed your mind?’

WTF

Mia were you meeting him now? Are you there?

I’m meant to be leaving now to get there on time.

He’s just replied ‘I just got home from work but we can do if you like? I’ll still be in my suit though! Haha!’

Seriously wtf. It’s an hour drive for me. Imagine if I get there and he flakes.