DP just bought a ring... Am I crazy to think he's about to propose?

[rosetonightplease]

We've been together for 18months . We have discussed marriage in the past and he knows I would say yes... The only thing id that I love jewellery in general so it could be just a random gift :/

Just a little tip;

A piece of jewellery drops is only worth 1/3 of its price once it's taken out of the shop. I used to work in a high end goldsmith and the amount of angry men/women who wanted us to buy back an unworn engagement ring for more than 30%. Usually you can buy an unworn engagement ring from around 50% of the shelf price.

Pass that info onto your DP to save him going into to debt and buy a ring secondhand.

OP clearly isn't planning on dragging her DP up the aisle in the next 5 weeks, so "married" is not relevant. They're clearly separated and moved on, she isn't screwing him behind the Poor Dear Wife's back and planning to break up a household.

OP if you can afford to provide financially for yourself and the baby, then crack on TTC. Your age and fertility concerns being at the forefront, and you being the higher earner any way, I'd get on with it.

However, I'd be pretty annoyed he'd spent hundreds on a ring he can't afford when he's got kids and a house to afford. The reality of having kids is that the money goes on keeping them housed, dressed and fed first and foremost.

Who's paying the maintenance for them or do they live with you? Are you financially supporting him and his kids so he can buy you pretty things??

I had a promise ring and now I'm engaged. Both rings were diamonds, first one 0.3ct this one just over 1ct.
I think it's nice, for us the ring was a sign of what's to come, a serious commitment and a promise to not hurt me because i'd been badly hurt before.

£5k for a ring? Blimey, I feel old sometimes. and poor

I thought an engagement ring should be a month's wages? Not something the poor bloke has to get a loan out for! I wouldn't want to start married life in debt, let alone engaged life...

ALOT why not just get engaged instead though?

Eugh this thread, makes me despair. I'd much rather marry a man who prioritised his own children than forking out on a ring he can't afford as a pre promise. You sound massively high maintainence.

How old are you OP? Are you a wannabe Kardashian?

You sound insane.

Chill out. Its been 18 months. Not years.

What's your dream ring like?

That's the one

£23k??????

I'd be well insulted if that ring was all I got. What a cheapskate

There are different sizes thus prices but in essence is that one.

Hold your horses! Let him finalise his divorce first. I don't know why anyone would want to be engaged to someone who is still married.

Because the divorce is just a few weeks away. Neither of them want to be together. His ex us in in a similar position as me.. will get engaged as soon as the decree comes through the post.

@rosetonightplease - I've been where you are. Kind of. Dh was married but separated when we met. We ended up with house and 2 babies before his divorce was finalised.

The day his decree absolute arrived we hot footed it to the registrars office, gave notice and got married 30 days later! (You have to have 28 full days notice of intention to marry). We've been together 13 years, married for 8. I love him to bits.

You seem to be striving for perfection and that way madness lies! Yes it would be wonderful if he had a spare 5k to drop on your perfect ring. But that's £5000 you could also spend on so much else when you are also planning a family.

He has bought you a ring. He has spent time considering what you would like and chosen this one. But because it's not the ring you want and he knows it, he has said it is a 'promise' ring, a promise of engagement.

When you talk that you already have a 3k ring and a Rolex, I can see why he feels like he has to try and keep up with the standard you have set.

For context, dh sold his Rolex watch to pay for our first baby's things and some extra furniture we needed, and we didn't go for top of the range either.

It doesn't actually matter how long you've been together but it does matter that you seem to be so materialistic when your dh can not afford to be so spendy. That is the sort of imbalance which will end up causing problems down the line.

Thanks @HoptoitDufflepuds that is reassuring. I've told him a million times I'm not materialistic, but his met my family and compares himself to them . I think that's where the

OP - just to let you know that ring is £15,500 not £5000 and its sold out unfortunately.

“I've told him a million times I'm not materialistic, You could, as they say, have fooled me!

I've got a Tiffany soleste (colourless diamond though) and it's the best so I understand haha.

J-Lo.

It concerns me that you would even think of a pricy ring when he has DC to support.

How many nights a fortnight does he have his DC stay over?!How much maintenance does he pay above CSA minimum?

If you have DC together, who will be making changes at work and arranging childcare, doing pickups etc?

Sorry haven’t RTFT but aren’t you the person who posted a couple of weeks ago to say he’s not yet divorced and has no assets and you’ve decided you’re no longer bothered about being married?

Yes that's me latent this shoes that obviously I still care when I saw it so close.

^^ When you saw what so close? The prospect of a marriage proposal, or the prospect of getting a new ring?

Sadly you don't come across as unmaterialistic. Otherwise why mention the 3k ring and Rolex watch.

Or are you actually disappointed he didn't get it and propose with it?

Is he a high earner? Or will an expensive purchase wipe him out.

The only reason why I mentioned that was because in his mind he has to "compete" against that. I though it all added up. Decree coming soon and the ring = engagement.

Loopy he will as we can't afford to lose my income.

I don't think materilaistic means what you think it does, you are coming off as the very definition.