Dating thread 142: love will tear us apart...again

[DaffoDeffo]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

And leigh well done for getting on bumble

Thanks! Had a good date with the actor and we'll meet up again when he's back in the area. It can't be anything but casual, but he's not my type enough to fall for him (and I'm still a bit taken with the other guy who just wants to be friends, especially as he's messaging me several times a day and we're becoming really good friends - I'm giving myself a headfuck lol).

Need a bit of a break though as my mother in law needs all my attention at the moment following a not too good oncology appt yesterday. Do have snoozed bumble less than a week after beginning to use it.

The drought is over!!

But haven't heard from him today so not quite sure what;'s going on

user pleased the snog drought is over, I hope it was a good one

rich you certainly prove the bus theory - as in nice dates all come along at once! Try not to overthink, remember things have a way of working themselves out so you have to go with the flow in the early stages. Wishing you the very best of luck tonight.

user yay! to the end of the snog drought. Have you messaged him today?

I've had a text from tonight's date hinting that he might like to end my snog drought. Just hope I fancy him enough to go for it. I wasn't convinced at the end of date 1.

I think he must have thought I had had a personality swap with someone. I was chatty and fun,gone was that shy girl from last week. Was secretly a bit merry by the time he picked me up. we laughed,he asked questions,we even played darts( he very competitive)

He txt to say he'd got home.

I replied thanks for a lovely evening at around 12.30 but this morn nothing. My only hope was after the snog fest he said ' to be continued....'.

He isn't a big txter,but I hear nothing by tonight not sure what i'll do.

Good luck myold, if you're feeling it,do it!

It's such a weird situation I'm in with Mr Spain. Dating has been going well. The opportunity to dtd has been there but just hasn't happened! I'm not confident enough to take control so I've just been waiting to see what happens. But I have limits. With a room booked for tonight if it doesn't happen I'm out and will have to have that conversation!

scotgal I hope mr Italy has been in touch and sorted another date

changeoflife sounds like tonight is make or break with this guy. A 3 month wait is long ! I remember it was 6 weeks with my now FWB and that was torture

Mr Music and I seem to be doing a mutual slow fade. I haven't replied to his last message from yesterday as it didn't really need one. And no messages today. Not a fan of lose ends but hey..

Well it's been another strange week. As I sat last night binging alone on Netflix I suddenly had a revalation... I'm expecting too much in such a short time maybe. Its literally been weeks into the beginnings of a new relationship, I'm expecting things to be like we've been together for years! I'm going to take a step back and just let things develop naturally. Relationships don't just spontaneously happen do they... They evolve!

@Pushreset how long have you been dating? Are you 'exclusive'? Sorry I can't keep up with everyone haha!

Yes I’ve jumped into the Tinder soup again
After the last disaster I’ve just decided I can
A. Be miserable for weeks about it or
B. Have another go.

Has tinder changed in the last 6mos? It says I have 2 messages but I can’t open/see them?

MollysGirl Are they messages from matches that you can see? I've had problems in the past with it not loading messages - the app just seems to hang. Sometimes if you log out and then back in again that can fix the problem.

@wishywashy6 exclusive about two months now. Still nowhere near getting integrated as we've got a bit of a distance between us. I was just stressing about everything he seems to have on his plate and fitting me in too but I suddenly realised its waaay to early for me to be involved with that part of his life. Its just the part of me that craves a full time relationship taking over!

Skimming through - have a poorly child
Just wanted to say @MyOldBrainStoppedWorking best of luck with your 2nd date!

pushreset I struggle with this too! My last relationship was a year and very committed and serious. And before that my marriage.
So I find dating really hard and also guilty of expecting too much.

@coolcahuna I don't think we're alone in that mentality! I decided that if I keep reaching out and not getting the response I want I'm only going to get anxious and push him away. I have a good feeling about Mr Red, if its meant to be he knows where I am and the other side of the coin... he needs to get used to things too maybe.

Glad everyone's dates seem to be going well, well @changeoflife, let's hope staying together tonight gives the desired result!

I had a crazy night last night, the redhead (will call him Mr Redhead) who said all that matters is us having sex....well i'd had a few glasses of wine and just though F it and we had some sex chat....he lives about 2 hours away, is attractive and if the opportunity arose (and I was still single) I could see myself meeting up with him for a FWB situation.

Of course, this morning Mr Italy has messaged and said he would like to meet again very soon, I'm waiting on confirmation if he is free tomorrow, so Mr redhead may just have to stay on the very backburner as Mr italy is definitely the more mature, sensible option for a worthwhile relationship.

Mr 4amguy has completely dropped off the face of the planet so i assume he has his attention elsewhere which is a shame because I think if we had met in person we might have hit it off......

I think this dating malarkey is going to turn my red hair grey!!

Was put onto thisvthresd by my friend after I text her to tell her about my recent let down so John's zoosk 5 weeks ago ended up giving in to a guy that asked for my WhatsApp...breaking my rules for a start off. We talked for a week and then I was in Portugal for hols. Morning noon and night getting pics texts constant. Sending little romantic clips of stuff he knows I like...met him dinner he brought me a gift. Stayed until late didn't want to come back...snogging all night asked me if I felt a spark as he did etc etc. Text to say he had a great time and glad I liked my gift the usual darling this darling that...would definitely like to see me again. Suggested We meet next week. Then was going to his mother's for his birthday the next day....didn't hear from him....very unusual...I've usually 4 mails and a pic by 4pm lol. I mailed him the day after asking if he had a good time with h8s fam he said yes but forgot his charger and had no number for me I retorted haha that old chestnut....and he didn't read it...I went onto zoosk viewed his profile as he was online seconds later he blocked me read my WhatsApp and blocked me from that too??? What is that all about ? Seriously. Why wouldn't you just say changed my mind. ? Had another date tonight with a guy and cancelled it as I am totally deflated by this man. I let my guard down and this is what he does.. sake.

Oh @Ap69 what a let down. You'd have to be pretty thick skinned and hard hearted not to let that affect you. Try not to fathom out why he's acted like he has - it's him, not you. Some people are just weird. I'd arranged to meet someone 3 times and he cancelled each time - loads of messages every day over about 3 weeks, seemed like a really nice guy but there was always some reason he cancelled. Then he ghosted me but he didn't block me. Curiosity got the better of me and I contacted him to ask why - apparently he thought I was completely out of his league and thought I'd hate him (even though we'd also FaceTimed a lot as well so I knew what he looked like "in the flesh") . We never met, but we still catch up online occasionally. He's still never made a first date with anyone yet

@Pushreset definitely need to just take things as they come and not stress!
It's been about the same amount of time for me and my BF too although were the other way round in that it's me with a manic schedule!

@Ap69 don't try and work out why, definitely him not you!
I'd always be cautious of anyone this full on so soon, it's rarely real and probably just generic crap they spout to everyone!

He sounds like a tosser

ap69 people are so odd. I can't fathom it out! I've just been unmatched by someone I was having a perfectly nice chat with. So confusing. One thing for certain...It's him not you!

pushreset it sounds like things are going in the right direction so definitely just see how it goes. It may all work out just the way you want to. It's hard not to get overinvested when you meet someone special. Especially when we know how crap OLD is

I appear to be down to just one iron. Mr Ex which is not good!!! We are still chatting but I'm finding it a bit slow going with him. Might be better when we meet.

I think you are right..I let myself get reeled in and actually said at the time I was cautious of giving my number out before we met..lesson learned and thank you !

He still has me on messenger and was active. I defo think he had another date the next night And enjoyed that more ! It's so bloody frustrating girls eh ! I'm looking forward to next week's date though he looks a bit Daniel craigesque lol. X