Catching my husband cheating?

[dontpointatme]

I can go into the back story later if needed, I just need to know if I need to get this set up quickly…

In a nutshell, I'm 99% certain my "D"H is up to something. I've found out from the wife of his friend that he cheated a while ago and he's been behaving so suspiciously recently that I'm sure he's up to something again. I'm not kicking him out though until I have proof, as he'd just go for the wounded party thing, and I'm not having that. He denies everything when confronted.

So, he's away apparently visiting a friend this weekend... I can't follow him to see where he goes as I have commitments that I can't get out of, so my (psycho wife) idea is to send my old phone with a PAYG sim hidden in in his car, so I can see where he (or at least his car) actually is...

Forget the rights and wrongs, will this work to track him assuming the phone is on silent and Bluetooth etc turned off so the car doesn't link to the phone? Am I completely insane?

Oh, what a piece of work he is! Glad you have copies of the invoices, he can’t possibly wriggle out of that one now!
I hope you are ok, sounds as though you have lovely supportive friends around you which is great. Be kind to yourself.

Wow he is such an idiot

I'm angry for you OP!
The business has a lot of debts - no wonder, when he's staying in expensive hotels, and buying designer stuff for the OW.
This may have been going on longer than you realise. Hope there's no nasty surprise for you regarding the house he helped OW get.
You've hard times ahead - wishing you strength and the best of luck

So sorry OP

Sorry you're going through this OP, he doesn't deserve you, you're strong, intelligent and come across as a warm and genuine person, he on the other hand is a prize twat. Keep your head held high and enjoy snuggles with your little one, I'm sure amongst the sadness and anger you must be feeling relieved.

OP, I think you should get a job with MI5!!

Which looks a bit like M&S, but is very different I believe.

Wow! It gets worse - cheating on wife AND preying on a vulnerable woman.

However, as she's officially single he can go stay at hers! Or where are his parents? His family?

Well done for getting copies of those invoices.

Oh there's nothing vulnerable about her really. His parents are too far away for him to stay with as his business is based here, and it's not that easy to move in with friends really.

He still swears blind there is nothing going on, and I actually think there is a chance it's not a real affair, he's just been running around after her like an idiot and she's taking what she can get from a silly older man.

Regardless, there's no chance of him coming back and he knows it.

Sounds like they deserve each other OP, while you deserve much better.

why do posters say ‘preying on a vulnerable woman’??

It’s an MN thing. Frustrating!

Do you have a company role officially ... will you be going through the accounts with a fine tooth comb ? Payroll, bonus, expenses or company loans ? Make sure you aren’t subsidising anyone, whilst believing you are in shared debt?

Wow! It gets worse - cheating on wife AND preying on a vulnerable woman.

Where does Op imply she is vulnerable? I'm confused!
As much as OPs husband is a liar and a cheat, it doesn't mean this woman doesn't know how to play the game!

Wow - that's some good detective work there OP.
I'm sorry you are going through this.
And I really hope he can give you a bit of honesty.
But I doubt it.
And no way would I accept gifts like that unless there was more to it.
Good luck today!

I absolutely believe she has been playing him for gifts and favours etc, but then my opinion of her was pretty crap even before this came out. I knew she was up to something with him, and yes I do blame her too. She'll have known fine well that this was all behind my back and while she doesn't owe me any loyalty it's still wrong.

I don't have a role in the company so can't get to the accounts etc, however when he's back later I'm going to ask to see his credit card online, find out exactly what he's spent. God help him if he says no...

Am off to the marriage counseller in an hour, quite looking forward to it actually, she's in for a surprise as she was saying how loyal she thought he was at the last session...

Oh, and if MI5 (or M&S 😂) are watching, please feel free to get in touch!

Oh and while I'm at it, fuck you Daily Mail and any other shit-rags that are reading. This is my life.

Fuck me op you're like Sherlock Holmes! You need to host the Relationship board on here 👊👊👊

Go go go!

OP have a good airing of your thoughts and feelings at your session today, you've done so well in holding it all together, after such a betrayal, honestly

You can't get to the accounts but I'm sure a divorce lawyer can.

He has been buying her designer stuff while you are in debt? What an utter fuckwit.

Glad you got your answers OP, the amount of lies he's told it doesn't matter if its a 'proper' affair, he's lied to you at every opportunity, and bought her gifts when you're already in debt. He sounds vile

How was your counselling session, @dontpointatme?

Hope you're doing OK.

It was really good thanks, she was totally shocked with everything I had to tell her. He was there last week and she obviously knew none of it... I even got a hug from her at the end and she said she was very impressed with how I had handled it and that my humour was still shining through 😃

Am absolutely not looking forward to him coming home later, I just hope he answers all of the questions that I have truthfully now that he really has nothing left to lose, but I'm not holding out much hope. After all, why bother if he knows we're over.

I’ve been agog at your situation OP and so so sorry.

However.

It is strong, together, women like you that give me hope that if I ever found myself in a similar (or any life destroying) situation, that I may just be able to come through it intact and myself.

I really hope you can find truth and peace soon and that your life going forward is everything you want it to be