Dating thread 141 - fun and games

[Koko12]

Hope not stepping in anyone’s toes but thought I’d start the new thread as old one was full and I wanted to post!

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Anyone on Bumble. I got offered the chance to have my profile looked at. Great but you have to fill in a form about yourself and upload screenshots of your profile and 10 photos of yourself. There's no guarantee they'll choose your profile but just be prepared if you get the chance.
I don't have 10 photos so I couldn't do it

I'm so confused!!!

MrYoung is amazing, but tonight a guy that I was chatting to last week on WhatsApp suddenly reappeared. He's quite clearly only after a late night bootie call, but he is so up my street looks wise (more so than MrYoung), 6ft 2, beard, handsome as hell and a body hotter than anything I've seen in a loooong time. He lives locally and quite honestly if he gave me his address I'd be there in a flash. I havent had sex for 2 years (I'm only 43!). I'm going to call this one MrHipster.

Why do I feel like I'm being "unfaithful" to MrYoung. I think it's so engrained in me that monogamy is the norm and the thing that nice girls do , this all seems so wrong to me and my worry is I'm going to keep getting into relationships with irons because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by dating more than one at a time.

I feel so guilty about speaking to MrHipster tonight, but it feels like a thrill at the same time. Are you all honest at the outset that you are dating other people? It's too late for me to say anything to MrYoung he'd run a mile. He's a very one woman at a time kind of guy. I'm sure MrHipster is made of tougher stuff, which makes him really attractive in a bad boy kind of way. He could definitely become a FWB but I know MrYoung would never be happy with that.

Gaaaaaaaah!!

@JeSuisPrest

I’m feeling the same, 3 dates in, 1 including sex twice but I’m still looking/chatting to others and feel SO guilty.

Also I guy I was seeing 2 years ago keeps messaging me. He’s lovely but just after hook ups tobshich he’s been honest about.

I’ve had a huge drought so tempted by him but then again feel so guilty.

Is this the dating norm I just need to get with and go with the flow?

@jesuis have you and mr young met yet? I can't remember!

@eesha No intimacy is hard but ask yourself if you'd come away from it (with him) feeling great about yourself. If not, especially as the first in a while, I'd not bother. Fwb' s can be great but only if you feel great about it.

Afm, I am still seeing mr runner. I thought maybe it would be a slow burn but I'm still not sure so I had a chat with him and basically said....not sure if I'm ready for anything serious and it's simmered down a bit. Had a look on the dating apps. Massively uninspired. Sigh

@jesuis ah sorry I was on the previous page catching up on the thread when I asked that question!

@supercali77 thanks for the kind words. I slept on it and was thinking although I want to be as cool and stress free as possible while OLD, honestly my self esteem has been shot to pieces by my ex who had drink and anger issues. I still get scared and anxious pretty regularly at what might just be banter to others. Although MrSleazy probably is quite harmless, I think at the moment he would probably steamroller me with his bluntness, rudeness and number of existing fwbs. It's funny as when we first met, he said I seem like the type who falls into relationships with the wrong men whereas he is the type who meets the right women but pushes them away. No shit Sherlock!

Had a lovely day/eve with Mr Weekend-was easy going,non-awkward and just had a good time.dtd was ok but I think I’ve perhaps been spoilt with lots of good sex in the past but I guess it takes a bit of time to get to know each other’s bodies.I’m not going to chase him, will just wait and see what happens

jesuis Mr Hipster sounds perfect, I would be there in a flash too, I love the whole bearded tall man look (tattoos a bonus too). This is why I let Mr Beard over too mine a while ago, sadly he wasn’t that great in bed and now keeps messaging me everyday asking for round 2.

It’s sunday morning, POF rush hour 🤣 does anyone else find POF is busy Sunday mornings? I seem to get loads of messages, shame none of them are that great but makes me feel popular.

mr youngat38 didn't get back to me after the dog walk,except a txt to say lovely to meet you. Although he wasn't really my sort, I used to have men chase me and now I don't! Lots of views on pof but only a few messages and they aren't really my sort. Think big spud heads holding fish with fag and tinny in hand. Only chatting to one but he lives with his mum. That doesn't really matter but i'm not looking to have anyone here for a bit and can't really hang out at his!

going to put my radius more than 10 miles,that's probably why i'm having no luck!

User if I set my radius at 10 miles I wouldn’t get anyone, I set it at 20. I have had a message this morning, looked ok, clicked on his profile and it says he’s 52 and not 45 (I’m almost 37 and 52 is too old for me). I have a few more matches on Tinder and Bumble but haven’t had time to send messages so the ones on bumble have expired 😐

Mr Nature has been messaging again and still wants to meet next weekend, I’m hoping a better offer will come along.

No one very inspiring on Bumble or Match currently. I have my radius set quite low, I want someone close enough to see regularly while living in their own house, at least until my teenager goes to Uni.

love I hate the bumble expiring thing. If I'm busy, they always expire!

I'm feeling meh about dating. Absolutely gorgeous 6ft4 bearded dark haired green eyed man matched with me. We had a lovely chat which he obviously got off on at the end and he has just buggered off. Obviously got his rocks off then disappeared! Argh! I suppose at least we didn't get to meeting so didn't waste any time.

No new irons that have any quality. Met friend last night who said I need to be clearer about wanting a relationship as he thinks the men matching with me think otherwise but fgs, not as easy as it seems!

MrMusic who I took 3 months to extricate myself from wants to see me later. Despite myself I probably will even though I bloody shouldn't!

eesha sometimes sex only is fine. But I wouldn't want to know about the others, even if there were others! I guess you've got to decide what works for you x

Isn't Tinder an extraordinary thing? I dipped my toe in for 30 minutes this morning. Matched with a guy who basically told me off for asking a question (he asked none - next), and now I'm talking to a really sweet one who wants a female led relationship ie to be beaten. This is not the first time I've had conversations like this, so clearly I am doing something wrong Funny though

@eesha yeah definitely .... the first one you end up with might just be a sex thing...and why not.... a bit of fun without strings but it's pointless if it doesn't also boost your self esteem at the same time. The right one will come along! Don't settle x

Dog I have had a couple men wanting a women led relationship, I’m not totally against it, if someon3 wants to do my housework and run around after me more fool them 😂 but when it comes to the bedroom stuff I don’t think I could be a full on Dom.

I guess I just need to message men as soon I match with the, on bumble but sometimes I need time to think of something to write and before I know it they have expired.

Jesuis you haven't met Mr Young yet so honestly, you don't really know what he's like. You don't owe him anything beyond basic courtesy at this point and you're definitely not being 'unfaithful', you haven't even had a first date yet. It's very pre-emptive to be deleting your POF profile and feeling guilty about talking to others before you've met in real life. He might be great but at this stage it could easily go either way. I had a good/'different' feeling about Mr Canada right from the start but I'd been around the OLD block enough times so I was still talking to a few other people and although I stopped actively looking, I didn't delete any profiles until I'd actually spent some time with him.

@VetOnCall thanks for that get your big girl pants on talking to. I needed it. I'm doing OLD for me, not to massage yet another male ego- I've done that for the last 20 years!

Will see how our meeting goes tomorrow and I'll post an update

So Mr Farmer got back in touch claiming internet issues? Chatted Friday evening but then undelivered last WhatsApp message for 24 hours then messages and says had WhatsApp issues?

Me thinks he has a wife / partner and disables his internet so notifications don't come through?? Or am I just cynical?

Mr Accountant messaged yesterday to announce he was hungover, haven't heard from him since either ...

Next!

Dance yes, does sound a bit iffy, no one has that many ‘issues’ 🤣

I’m now talking too someone on POF who lives near by, he has dreadlocks (I love dreads) and is a bit of a hippy. He’s almost ten years older than me but that doesn’t bother me. Hopefully because he’s local he will be quick at asking me out.

Love the dom thing doesn't stack up. The woman is supposed to be in charge but it's all about what he is getting off on, not her, so he's actually in charge. Plus, he says he'll do my gardening but needs painful correction - which suggests to me he's going to do the gardening wrong so he can get a beating. I don't want my gardening done wrong by someone else, I'm doing it wrong myself!

🤣🤣 Dog ,I see, he wants to do everything for you but wants to do it all wrong so he gets a beating, so actually he’s no help at all, just a hindrance? Sounds like my ex husband. Best to do your own gardening.

Sounds like my exH as well, should I have been beating him? Is that where I went wrong ??

Definitely like my ex husband too. There's a theme here ladies!