My new bf has disappeared...

[DizzyBeeme]

Hello all...

I wonder if anybody can help..my new partner has literally gone awol. We have been together for nearly 6 weeks now and he calls / txts me about 20 times a day . He is really into me and we have a lovely relationship. He lives about 2 hours drive from me. On Wednesday I received a distressed phone call from him..saying some friends had stabbed him in the back and..he sounded broken and said it was not my fault..I then got a flurry of txts from him..and a final txt at 6.50pm saying his phone was out of battery and his body really hurts... he sounded panicked and very distressed. I tried to call/message back but phone was off by this point.

Since then. Nothing. His phone is switched off. I don't have any family or friends numbers yet..and apart from drive down to try and find the man..I do not know what to do.

I'm thinking Maybe he needs a few days to sort himself out...he has not been on Facebook or any social media at all. He is a responsibly physiotherapist with a great job..I'm st my wits end ladies. I really really care for him..
I just dont know what to do.. help..

Thanks @boomtish

Elaborate, dramatic story = he's ghosted you.

You could just go to his workplace. If you find him there though, he will probably sheepishly tell you that he was in so much stress and bother he didn't want to worry you with it.

Then he'll find another way (story) to ghost you with

If this is the second time he’s done this, get rid. It’s not a normal or nice way to behave.

I had a guy do this to me. Sent some cryptic messages saying if anyone contacted me, to tell them we had never met. Blocked me and never heard again.

Probably married.

Very strange. Another who'd be checking his credentials.

Have you met his friends?

Op is strangely reluctant to be specific about anything at all

What do you want me to be specific about exactly? I've given all the info I had !!

Am i the only one who would have to find out if he was ok...

Then move on...?

Have you been to visit him op within the 6 weeks or has he came to you?

All sounds a bit dodgy to me.
Do you know exactly where he works?

Is he contactable at all times to you? ( apart from going AWOL twice of course ) as I'm wondering if the contact has been mostly initiated by him?

Sorry for all of the questions. This would drive me mad too. He does sound like he's bloody hard work though. The fact he has done this before shows that he has some issues.

Do not think because he is a "physiotherapist" that his MH is protected.

One of our lovely neighbours took his own life a few years ago. He had a decent profession too. He was a doctor. Means nothing when you're ill.

Hope everything works out for you and you get some answers.
Don't settle though op, never just settle

Seriously though, what if something bad has genuinely happened?

Have you shared real life meals and dates and stuff? Were you lovers?
He is probably fine somewhere being loved by someone else

Good luck OP - I hope you get closure.

The only physiotherapy he's doing is pulling your leg

😂😂😂😂

Thanks all. I'm drawing a line under this as a very bizarre experience. It has been an eye opener for sure..

Thanks all x

Well done DizzyBeeme, you are doing the right thing. Onwards and upwards, there are still good men out there (if you want one).

Smeared fruit jam man story quite brilliant Gender.

What is it about "physiotherapists"? I met a chap on holiday once who told me he was a .....physiotherapist! He came to see me once, but the second time he'd arranged to visit he apparently couldn't come because the South African rugby team had flown him by helicopter as a matter of some urgency to tend to an injured team member in Scotland! The email address he'd given me was [email protected].

I have no idea why he felt the need to concoct such a fantastical tale, I wasn't particularly fussed either way.

Dear OP. Sorry that you went through this. Sounds like a lucky escape.
I was going to suggest you check out Centre Parcs rather than hospitals but I I think you are right not to waste any more time on him. And his rashes.

Did you ever check the physio register OP?

You’ve met like what, five or six times, and you’re already referring to him as your partner? I don’t think you know what that word means. I agree with PP, leave him be. Permanently. But you might want to have a think about your own maturity too. There’s nothing to be gained from speeding into a relationship and trying to make it seem/be more serious than it is. Reminds me of fourteen year olds who don’t know any better referring to a boyfriend of a week as their ‘partner’: understandable as a kid when you’re desperate to be seen as a grown up, but not great as an actual adult!

How TF do you know he doesnt have mental health illness? Youve knkwn him six weeks.

And whats his job got to do with it? My BF is a safeguarding officer for vulnerable, mentally ill, drug addicted ex cons homeless etc and he has huge mh problems. Sounds like the shit hed do when one of his other personalities comes out. Except if i ignore him he stops it within a couple of hours but until i realised what waa going on it could last days.

Because I am bipolar and was very open with him about my struggles. He did not.mention any mental illness so stop being do damn judgemental !!

@jessielemon if I want to refer to him as my partner I will !! Who made you judge and jury !! Get off my thread !!

So, I didn't see if you replied yet or not, did you check the physio register?

"Oh god please"

He actually typed and sent this? How distraught and out of control can he have been if he was able to send this message. Someone might say this in a horror movie but they d not sit and text and send it if they were in such a bad place that they're wailing "oh god please!"

It's an elaborate dumping of you imvho.

Apparently. Personally I would have ended with 'aghh they got me, it's getting dark, too dark to see, mother, is that you?? I ....'.

Op, have you checked the register yet?