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Original poster

Oh fuck. I think I’ve just found an affair phone

999 replies

FuckyDuzz · 03/08/2018 15:57

Well it’s not really an ‘I think’ really, I just have

There was an unfamiliar beeping coming from the coat/shoe cupboard so I went in to investigate and found a phone in DPs coat, a cheap little Nokia with just one contact - a woman’s name

I am home alone with 4 kids trying not to cry but honestly I could throw up right now
Wtf

OP posts:
Kakamora · 03/08/2018 16:35

I’d be getting a babysitter and taking a drive with a friend to the address.

Heismyopendoor · 03/08/2018 16:35

So sorry OP. Don’t do anything rash, not that I believe he is innocent but, as is often said on MN, you need to get your ducks in a row. Assuming of course this is the end for you.

ReggieKrayDoYouKnowMyName · 03/08/2018 16:35

Ergh. Prick. A friend is going through this at the moment OP. I’m so sorry. Get the info from the phone, hide the phone somewhere he won’t find it, get your ducks in a row.

Givemeallyourcucumber · 03/08/2018 16:35

Or as someone else has said tell him he isn't going anywhere but staying home to discuss this.

InDubiousBattle · 03/08/2018 16:36

I think pp are right op if you confront him he'll deny it u less you have solid evidence. He'll lie. Make note of the address and number etc the replace the phone. Spend this evening getting together all of your documents , financial details etc. Is there someone who can be with you tonight?

MrsSnootyPants2018 · 03/08/2018 16:36

Hide the phone for a while and see if he acts any differently. I don't think you should confront him with your children in the house.

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom · 03/08/2018 16:36

What do you want to do if he is cheating? Is it game over or do you want to try to work through it?
No way would I be happy with him going out tonight either way. Personally I'd catch him on his own & flash the phone then say I think we need to chat don't you?

adoggymama · 03/08/2018 16:36

@HollowTalk amen! Honestly I'd go crazy!

Rebecca36 · 03/08/2018 16:37

I would try to contact her, maybe surreptitiously, to see if you can find out anything.

Then confront your partner. It does look as though he's up to no good.
See what sort of explanation he comes up with.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Thebluedog · 03/08/2018 16:37

Why wait, when he gets in tell him you know about the affair with x, give him a bag and tell him he might as well stay out and find another place to live. You have all the evidence you need.

Sorry you are going through this OPFlowers

CaledonianQueen · 03/08/2018 16:37

Is his other phone an iPhone? Can you turn find my iPhone on and look up where he has been? I would be calling a friend/ relative to see if they could babysit so you can wait outside and confront him.

You need to search on WhatsApp/ Facebook, you need to know if he is seeing a sex worker/ a woman from work/ it could even be a guy from work. You need to know what he is up to, so you can protect your sexual health and have all your ducks in a row before kicking his ass out!

fuzzyfozzy · 03/08/2018 16:37

I have to say I'd be driving round to the address after he's gone out with his mates. Get a babysitter.

DarlingNikita · 03/08/2018 16:37

Change the number in the phone to your number. Leave the rest of the details as they are.

Wait for him to text/ring you...

I think I'd do this.

CantankerousCamel · 03/08/2018 16:38

So sorry OP x

Harpstrings · 03/08/2018 16:38

I'd keep the phone too. Once he has it back, your proof is gone and he will deny everything whilst calling you crazy.
Wait and see how long it takes him to realise he's been rumbled.

sonjadog · 03/08/2018 16:38

I wouldn’t put it back. See what he does when he can’t find it.

Glaciferous · 03/08/2018 16:38

I don't think there is a good explanation for this. With that in mind, you really need to get as much information as you can before you confront him (WhatsApp, FB etc) because he will lie to you and try to cover his tracks. And yes, I would be packing him a bag and telling him not to come home tonight as you need some space.

Harpstrings · 03/08/2018 16:39

Change the number in the phone to your number. Leave the rest of the details as they are.

Just seen this. Even better.

HollowTalk · 03/08/2018 16:39

Send her a text saying, "Can't make it tonight. I've just been tested positive for an STD and need to take antibiotics."

Then delete the sent message.

3girlmama · 03/08/2018 16:39

Oh god, you must be beside yourself. I'm some ways him going out tonight will allow you time to think but equally you'll be thinking about where he is/who he's with 😡 what a prick (him not you x)

bethy15 · 03/08/2018 16:40

Have you saved the number in your own phone?

If it's a sex worker, you would probably know if you phoned it by the way she answers the phone.

Call it from a withheld number and see who picks up.

checkingforballoons · 03/08/2018 16:41

If it was me I’d be switching off the phone, hiding it and going down with the most awful migraine I’d ever had. I’d be ever so grateful that he stayed home to watch the children tonight. Then I’d pop out tomorrow, grab a charger for the phone and see how OW reacted to being stood up. But then I’m a bit spiteful!

Mumshotel · 03/08/2018 16:42

Omg genius. Change the number to yours

Mumshotel · 03/08/2018 16:42

Write hers down first

purplecorkheart · 03/08/2018 16:42

If you can access his other phone you could be able to check his timeline on google maps. It should tell you how often he has gone to that address.

Keep the nokia