Dating Thread 134 - 50 Swipes of Tinder

[RunsforCake14]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Do different sites have different amounts of information that it's possible to put? Eharmony has quite a lot of questions to answer but I don't know about any of the others. I once joined Match about 16 years ago but can't remember what it was like as far as layout went.

Kin, I have taken the time to write a decent profile. 90% of the time I get basic 'Hi there' or 'Hello married'. Which instantly makes me want to delete without replying.

Yeah, I hear you married - some of us men are useless and lazy I’m afraid.

Speaking for myself, I like to read a profile more than look at the photos because compatibility and interest in meeting is based on personality primarily. If a profile is blank...

I agree that personality is important but physical appearance is key too. Someone might be great on paper but if I don't find them attractive physically too then I won't contact them. I don't have a "type" and find different people attractive in different ways but if there's nothing I find attractive physically then it's a no. As previously discussed on here, I find men my own age look a lot older than I do (andthey say they are) and I find that off-putting. Once they get to about 47 they all look well into their 50s if not nearer 60.

Surely you mean 48?

If someone blocks you on What’s App how can you actually tell?

Update from me - met Mr Rugby in my local at 6pm on Sunday and he left my house at 3pm yesterday... so a 21 hour date with a whole lot of fun! Maybe it is a bit lovebomby but I'm having such a laugh with him, it's really helping me distance myself from Mr Screwed Up (who's still overseas anyway...) Saw him (Mr Rugby) again today and we went out for lunch, came back and watched the footy and ummm... stuff He wants to see me again on Sat night. I'm going with it! Having such a good time with him!

hatty I think their profile pic disappears on WhatsApp? Also any messages you send while they've blocked you stay on one tick (so undelivered) even if they later unblock you again.

Back from a date with Mr Blue (number 4/5 on week3), went around to his and he was far more relaxed and DTD as things got hot and steamy. He is nice, but thankfully not too nice as I like to know about physical compatibility early on

Shame I had to get home. He messaged after and we have plans for the next date and chatting about things we like longer term, but not in love-bombing way. I could really like him, but smitten bench is locked away until at least month for me. I know from experience red flags can appear after several weeks (or months) or I've had bad luck over last 2 years

i had a verrry brief description on the only site/app i used (Tinder) because most people swipe based on how you look. i mentioned what i studied/worked as, where im from, and my hobbies. im not amazing at conveying my personality online, im alot more jokey and sarcastic than i come across on the world wide web. so i just expected people to like my appearance, then get to know me and if we click, we click.

but i can see how it would be frustrating on sites like PoF and Match. arent there interest sections you can check off? so a list appears on your page?

Sorry HRFT (hope that is the right acronym) but can any of you tell me of your experiences of Bumble?
Ive only used one dating app, its not Tinder, but it is very similar.
Im quite intruiged by Bumble..

And from little skim of previous pages.. like the advice off Literary & Naynay

can i just clarify i did not mean i expected everyone to find me attractive

i meant IF they found me attractive, and decided to speak to me...

@esk1mo I thought that's what you meant anyway, don't worry!

No responses from anyone on eharmony.

Mr Hills contacted me last night to say he was cynical and needed some to stop him being that way. His conversation is so scintillating I await each message with bated breath

Esk I was the same on Tinder - I had very brief information on there. It did pull what I studied, where I studied and what I did for work from Facebook. I didn't think that many people actually read what was written and the guys only seemed to put their height.

Well, since I rejoined OLD on Friday, I have sent 2 messages on POF and 7 on Tinder and not got a single reply which is shockingly bad compared to previous experiences.

Guess my 3 months of gardening leave is going to drag a bit!

I don’t know how to bold on my phone but @waves Bumble is the only site I like now.....give it a go for sure

@kin same here 🙁
Get plenty of ‘hi sexy’ messages from the weirdos, anyone I actually quite like and make the first contact don’t reply.
I think I need a profile make over...

Kin sorry your having a rubbish time with POF and Tinder. I still have loads of messages coming in (30+now) and I haven’t sent a single message to anyone (first message). I changed the style of my profile, instead of putting my good points I put down my bad points , instead of painting an amazing picture of myself I put the truth, I also included that I have a child with Autism. I have never had so much interest. I only have 2 profile pictures too, one full length and one selfie (nothing that special).

Out of all the people that have messaged me I now have one that seems really nice, hopefully we are meeting next Tuesday. We have quite a lot in common, he doesn’t have children but has nieces and nephews that he spends a lot of time with so is kid friendly, oh and he’s reasonably fit and good looking. Shall call him Mr Chef.

That's an interesting approach Love, think I may have to experiment myself. I'm currently using my 'About Me' to tell a story rather than list likes/dislikes but the prose are obviously lost on my potential audience :(

I just thought, I get fed up reading the same old stuff on POF, the ball shit people write about being easy going, trustworthy and romantic, so I wrote a profile saying I’m unreliable and sometimes selfish , no ones ever as perfect as their profile suggests. It seems to have worked though we shall see if I actually get any dates with anyone that’s remotely normal.

Morning Guys n Dolls. Well after a lovely week and weekend with MrNorway he is OUT! A few Red flags and Im not playing stupid games. So he is gone. :(

Just when I thought Id found a decent guy... anyway, coffee date today with Mrgolf Im going along as he sounds fun. Will let you know this evening.

My profile now lists 10 things about me that suck! It will be interesting to see if that makes any difference to how I am perceived

Jax good luck with your coffee date.

Kin fingers crossed it will work.

I'd be worried that advertising my bad points would make potential dates think that I'll be more tolerant of their bad points or have low expectations which isn't the case. I'm happy to be proven wrong though!