What do you think when you hear someone is renewing their wedding vows?

[Mytwistedimagination]

Just that. Do you see it as a positive or negative? Do you assume there's a particular reason behind it?

(Reading that back, it sounds like journo fishing. It's not, believe me!)

For Catholics, this is a thing and isn't symbolic of anything other than an ongoing celebration of the couple's marriage. It is often connected to a significant anniversary and involves a church service with a mass too sometimes and more often than not a party afterwards!

Either like a good party or someone broke a vow

I think maybe most of us are only familiar with vow renewals that we see in tacky magazines and reality tv. It seems to be more of an American thing that is catching on a bit over here and maybe we associate it with z list celebs desperate for attention...

That's really beautiful PERF and a wonderful idea to have memories to look back on. I suspect the idea has been cheapened a bit by it being associated with the above examples.

Thank you, Kettlepotblack.

We are planning to do it when DS leaves home as marker of one phase of our marriage ending and another beginning. We won't invite anyone or even tell them, just go on holiday and have a little ceremony on a beach. We will also use the holiday to discuss our plans for our lives going forward as just a couple rather than parents (obviously we will still be parents but DS will be off forging his own life).

My husband wants to do this in a few years. Not because of any infidelity or unhappiness, mainly because neither of us had the wedding we wanted, it was done on the cheap and was more about keeping everyone else happy than ourselves. We both regret that I think.

If neither Katie Price nor Mel B have got a few more marriages/vow renewals/divorces to go yet, then I'll eat my hat.

We thought about it because our fingers had got fat and we needed new wedding rings, and as it was around our silver wedding, seemed like a good idea. We didn't in the end though.

My sister in law wants one because they had one of these weddings where just the couple went and therefore wants the big do. Hasn't happened yet either.

Reading this has made up my mind that I won't be having one haha

Someone's cheated or they want more attention / gifts.

I know several people that have done it - although none invited people apart from very close immediate family, so no new gifts or anything - very private.

No marital issues that I am aware of (although obvs you can never tell) so I took them to be lovely romantic gestures.

I'd do it one day for definite!

We had a vow renewal for our first anniversary because our family completely ruined our actual wedding! I surprised my husband by arranging it-told him to wear a suit and meet me at the place. We did the vows privately and had a picnic with our friends afterwards. It was lovely. It makes me upset to learn that people might have thought one of us had cheated!

osopolar that sounds like a really lovely idea which I think I might steal for (faraway) in the future (youngest dd is 2months old so have a bit to go!)

I don't jump to conclusions about cheating, I assume that for whatever reason the couple weren't able to have the wedding they would have liked to the first time round (money, illness etc) so want 'another chance' type thing

The only one I have been too was exinlaws 40th wedding anniversary. They were very churchy people and had it the church they got married in .
They had for them a normal big party at home .
FIL was in wheelchair as had Parkinson's. Which he had since he was in his 50s..

Found out later MIL had cheated. And had gone to priest for help .

Well, seems like the majority have hit the nail on the head in our case. Apparently it's a widely suggested technique for showing recommitment following infidelity (him). Probably more American than British atm, but seems like it's pretty well established in both places, and no doubt others.

I really hated the thought of a big wedding in the first place, but had a middling sized one because mil wanted us to have it. Wasn't appreciated, by the sound of things.
Under no circumstances would I repeat that now! And asking friends for presents would be the height of cheek, so no worries there. I'd thought possibly a small but lovely day abroad with the DC, but not sure it would mean much atm, although it turns out he cheated a long time before we married, but after 8 years together, which in my head shows a commitment to someone. Obviously I'll not know if it was easier because there had not been any vows to break at that point.
Thanks for all the stories of ppl recommitting for other reasons. Some are really lovely. Knowing that happens would make me slightly less cynical if someone I knew did it :).

And I'm really glad I hadn't posted that update earlier, as this thread had been picked up by the bloody Sun a few days ago, it appears.
Does anyone want me to ask for this thread to be pulled? I'm using a different username to usual, fortunately, don't know about others...

I’m reporting my own post for deletion. Those bastards can fuck off.

I'm really sorry PERF

It’s not your fault Mytwistedimagination. I honestly didn’t think any scummy paper would lift such an innocent thread. You’d think I’d know better by now. My details would be very outing. Please don’t feel bad and thank you for letting us know about The Scum picking up this thread. 💐