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Relationships

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What do you think when you hear someone is renewing their wedding vows?

270 replies

Mytwistedimagination · 06/05/2018 03:26

Just that. Do you see it as a positive or negative? Do you assume there's a particular reason behind it?

(Reading that back, it sounds like journo fishing. It's not, believe me!)

OP posts:
dragonwarrior · 06/05/2018 20:11

They didn't mean it the first time? Or someone had an affair? Or one of the couple is an entitled princess who just wanted to have their big day again....

cherrytrees123 · 06/05/2018 20:12

I would think attention seeking and trying to prove something. The only person I know who did this has a very unhappy marriage .

EdWinchester · 06/05/2018 20:13

I assume affair.

Vows don't expire.

SJCV · 06/05/2018 20:37

Another for Pete and Dawn 😂

ShatnersBassoon · 06/05/2018 20:41

I'd think they're attention seekers.

PetulantPolecat · 06/05/2018 20:49

For those posters who did it because one of you was ill or was terminally ill... I’m curious why you did it, if you wouldn’t mind explaining?

If I was in the position, it still wouldn’t occur to me to renew my wedding vows as they’d probably be either at their weakest or at their strongest at that point.

Kettlepotblack · 06/05/2018 20:49

Pete and Dawn of course 😂😂😂😂😂😂

TheClitterati · 06/05/2018 21:07

I think Heidi Klum and Seal used to do this every year. Until they divorced that is.

zeebeedee · 06/05/2018 21:07

Someone I know did this on a big anniversary, she had been very ill and lost a lot of her memory, and couldn't remember the original wedding, and at the time of the original wedding, wasn't able to invite her sisters, so they and their families we able to go to the renewal. The renewal was in the same church with the same vicar, and only a very few people were invited, and then a big anniversary party in the evening.

BoxsetsAndPopcorn · 06/05/2018 22:15

I can understand in the event of serious illness that it would bring joy but the guests would know the reason.

Other wise, yes affair or an imminent split. Surprised at how many do it as they want a second chance to wear a dress, do photos, different location. Sad that so many see all that as relevant rather than the actual vows that have already been made.

shadypines · 07/05/2018 00:10

I've never understood it. The beauty of vows is that they are supposed to be meaningful and everlasting .You renew something usually because it's worn out or expired, your TV licence, the car tyres, not a vow that is supposed to last a lifetime. To me it's like saying 'well it wasn't good enough the first time it needs doing again'

I don't want to upset anyone who has done it for illness reasons, whatever makes people happy but again, the original vows say 'in sickness and in health' so personally I still don't quite get it.

Belindabauer · 07/05/2018 00:28

I know 3 couples who've done it, all married a long time.
In reflection one woman has beaten cancer so that could be a reason
I'm not sure about the other 2. As far as I know nobody has been unfaithful.

DioneTheDiabolist · 07/05/2018 02:33

In my in-laws case, they wanted to do it with their DC and DGC there. In Dsis and Bil's case, they want to do it in a happier, more relaxed way, that they will think back on with fondness, rather than stress.Smile And hopefully have some photos of.

I get why it's not for everyone. But I also get why the people I know did it. And it has love and meaning behind it.💖

0hCrepe · 07/05/2018 07:28

My aunt and uncle did it for their 25th anniversary and it was lovely. He died suddenly a year later and it made me think how important it is to celebrate these things, say I still feel the same and come together as a couple and focus on that again. I’d like to do it for our 25th if we get there!!
I’m surprised by how negative everyone is!

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 07/05/2018 09:01

Exactly what shadypines said.

WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 07/05/2018 09:14

Someone definitely cheated.

The whole point of getting married is that it's supposed to be permanent unless you get a divorce. Not something you periodically renew. Each to their own but I think renewing your vows just doesn't make sense and if the couple haven't suffered infidelity, it's a bit attention seeking.

In the case of infidelity I guess it's more understandable as you broke the bond of fidelity and are committing to being faithful again.

MarthasGinYard · 07/05/2018 09:15

Shady

Yes

HeckyPeck · 07/05/2018 10:29

A lot of cynical people on here!

I'd just be happy for them and think they wanted to have a nice day celebrating their love.

heyhosilver · 07/05/2018 11:24

I think it's romantic

TrickyD · 07/05/2018 21:05

I have never understood the need to renew our vows and neither has DH. However every so often he chirrups:

"I don't know what gets into my head
But with these words I thee rewed"

That's enough for me.

okdok · 07/05/2018 21:07

Self-absorbed. Full of themselves if they expect others to attend.

SpeckledDot · 07/05/2018 21:09

Attention seeking

lljkk · 07/05/2018 22:09

One of my first thoughts was the Turpin family. :(

Joysmum · 08/05/2018 01:29

I’m surprised by how negative everyone is!

I’m not. MN is full of people who can’t understand how anyone could feel differently to them and becomes anti when they do.

ArtBrut · 08/05/2018 10:17

I think this must be a cultural thing, assuming the Mn opinion is representative of mainstream UK views. In my home country, it's an utterly ordinary thing long-established older couples often do for their 40th/50th/60th wedding anniversary, often as an adjunct to an anniversary party. My PILS, who have been together since they were 17 and 18, and who are utterly devoted to one another, and would no more dream of being unfaithful than they would of flying, did it for their 50th wedding anniversary. Absolutely no implication in my culture that it's repairing broken vows.