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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Cancelled date 30 minutes before..feel like crying

265 replies

Poppa445 · 22/04/2018 13:26

Been texting for 3 weeks ...
Arranged to meet today for a drink at quarter 2.
I got the train to his city (50 min train)
Literally got off the train and he has text
“My dad has been taken in hospital,can we re arrange?”
£18 train and 50 min journey
Feel like crying

OP posts:
GameChanger01 · 22/04/2018 19:42

No I would wait it out... don’t message first. He is most likely married. I’ve got my own personal old loser who I’m waiting to text so I can ignore him.

HollyBollyBooBoo · 22/04/2018 19:53

I would ghost him completely, even if he ever texts you, I just wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing the impact he's had on you.

DropItLikeASquat · 22/04/2018 19:53

@Madlizzy the ex I'm talking about that did similar shit (who turned out to be married) was called that too Confused Flowers

Wanderlusting99 · 22/04/2018 20:15

No words of wisdom but a virtual high five on your lucky escape from another Teessider :D

Original poster
Poppa445 · 22/04/2018 20:18

Thanks everyone I feel a lot better now :-)
Talking to a guy and he is giving me all the “your beautiful “ speel...probably tells every woman the same thing but it’s helping Grin

OP posts:
Sunbeam18 · 22/04/2018 20:21

You seem awfully reliant on compliments from strangers, tbh. I'd recommend laying off the dating for a bit.

jinglymum · 22/04/2018 20:24

Sounds rubbish :( I'm a fellow Teessider and met my partner on Tinder. Kissed lots of frogs before meeting him.

seventh · 22/04/2018 20:28

@Poppa445

I delete guys who use the term 'beautiful' or 'gorgeous' or any form of flattery when we first start chatting

For me it's disrespectful and sycophantic. I have a name. They can use that. Or go away.

Some men seem to think that flattery can get them noticed. For me, I find it cheapens our conversation and I don't like it.

SelkieUnderLand · 22/04/2018 20:32

I agree. My profile gives so much to work with. I'm not conventionally beautiful. I'm attractive. If somebody thinks I'm dumb enough to be won over by being called beautiful when they are too stupid to read my profile and find something in there to respond to then they are just throwing out ''hey babe'', scatter gun style.

Lilymossflower · 22/04/2018 20:33

Ooh how did it go? Xx

VladPutin · 22/04/2018 20:39

its ok to like compliments

Betsy86 · 22/04/2018 20:46

Any ladies out there in newcastle whos other half has been weird with his phone and dissapeared today and came back carrying pink converse... as a im a great dad peace offering.... he was with op.

Op you are better than this keep your chin up xxx

honeyroar · 22/04/2018 20:48

He was spectacularly rude to you and you didn't fancy him - who cares whether he found you attractive?? He's not good enough.

I agree with the "delete anyone who immediately starts telling you how beautiful you are or who starts telling you they're falling for you in texts or online conversations. Try and meet sooner and avoid texting for weeks, be very aware of anything that doesn't feel normal.

IWishYouWere · 22/04/2018 20:48

Ha ha name and shame op one of us geordie mumsnetters might know him lol

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 · 22/04/2018 20:56

Before you go on another date with someone you've been chatting with online ask them if they are openly single - so, would their mother and kids and friends and family agree that he is single.

Or better still, make facebook friends before meeting up and check that out.

GameChanger01 · 22/04/2018 20:59

Dating sites need review pages!

WhatsGoingOnEh · 22/04/2018 21:00

This is all so wrong. He texted you at 1.25pm to say he couldn't meet. Then he texted you again 25 minutes later... Why were you still there?!

I bet you looked absolutely gorgeous, and I bet this twat looked like a very average, non-special, cocky twat.

HariboIsMyCrack · 22/04/2018 21:06

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

YearOfYouRemember · 22/04/2018 21:11

"Your beautiful.?"

Your beautiful what?Hmm

ferntwist · 22/04/2018 21:17

I hope you can find your own inner sense of beauty. You don’t need these men to validate you! You’re a woman, be strong!

NigellasGuest · 22/04/2018 21:48

If he texts you again do not respond.

GreyGardens88 · 22/04/2018 21:51

Hahaha straight on to the next guy OP, I like it I like it!

HollowTalk · 22/04/2018 21:53

Yeah but honestly, OP, you shouldn't have met this twat. And don't believe the twat you're talking to now, who thinks he can get into your pants by complimenting you.

meowimacat · 22/04/2018 22:55

Oh my GOSH what a tool this guy was. To be fair when you went all that way you may as well have met him, I would have done the same.
If anything you dodged a massive bullet. Clearly he was probably married and last minute panicked about what he was doing. Or he's just a total moron.

Nothing wrong with you, do NOT take his rudeness and nastiness to link anything to yourself.

If it's any consolation I was meant to go on a date yesterday, the guy was supposed to come to me but in the end didn't bother. We've been speaking daily for 3 weeks too. At least I didn't make plans to go to him. Take it as a lesson learned, and do NOT ever arrange a first date where you make the effort. Get the guy to come to you or at least meet half way between you x

daisychain01 · 23/04/2018 04:28

Anyone who lacks a moral compass to the extent he is prepared to lie that his own father is in hospital, isn't a tool or a plonker, he's an utter wankbadger.

Why would you want to waste a minute of your life on such a non-human?