Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Bring on the Spring Flings. It's Dating Thread 132!

999 replies

VetOnCall · 02/04/2018 22:56

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
ValMc1 · 29/04/2018 18:27

I've been a bit naughty - I texted Mr Hun and said that we could have been on our date - he replied saying he'd thought the same thing and hoped I like him when we meet up - told him it wasn't going to happen and was he in a relationship or just had a better offer - he immediately went off line - bullet dodged

Jaxinthebox · 29/04/2018 19:20

well done val you caught him red handed and have dodged a bullet.

ValMc1 · 29/04/2018 20:05

Jax he has got back to me saying he is innocent ! Getting boring now ! He still wants to meet up - when you disagree before even meeting - ain't going to work

VixenSixen · 29/04/2018 21:00

I need some help.....

So this guy I have been dating. We are going to have our date next weekend. He messages me every day, morning, lunchtime & a few messages in the evening. Without fail every day.

Thing is, as nice as this is - I would really like it if we caught up on the phone occasionally but concious this is early days and not everyone likes to talk on the phone.

How do I approach this one with him at our next meet up?

Clearly keen as he always messages me first thing in the morning etc. Perhaps he just wants to take it slowly? I dont know.... he's been single about 2 years and wonder whether he is reluctant to take that step.

Who knows. I'm just giving him plenty of space and keeping it cool. Well, trying to appear that way at least 😜

SansaClegane · 29/04/2018 21:04

cautiously steps into the thread
Guys I think I might... have a date!
Long story short, I've had a crush on someone for a few months now, and turns out he has a crush on me too Blush and we're texting lots and planning to go on a proper date next weekend...
It all happened so fast I can't quite believe it yet!! But I'm so happy! Smile

Bant · 29/04/2018 21:32

Have you asked him if you could chat on the phone, vixen? He may not want to, but he may actually like the idea. Either way, if you want it, then ask for it, and then you know where you stand.

Personally I’m fine with not chatting on the phone before I meet someone, but I don’t have any major objections to it if someone wants to. I wouldn’t suggest it myself though in case it scared them in some way. If you want it, suggest it.

VixenSixen · 29/04/2018 21:40

Bant so we have been on few dates now and I'm really keen to perhaps step into like having perhaps one call a week or something?

Admittedly I haven't asked him yet but I think I might move that way after we meet up at the weekend.

I mean I love the messaging but also don't want to keep up contact over What'sApp all the time..... I think it could have the potential to freak him out a bit which is why I'm treading carefully 🤣😂

We have been chatting by What's app for what feels like forever and only met in person for the first time around a month ago but we have great chemistry in person, juat a shame we can't get together more 🌈

Bant · 29/04/2018 21:44

Look, you want someone who wants to speak with you on the phone. That’s what you want. If he doesn’t want to be with someone who likes to speak on the phone, and you stay together with him out of fear of unsettling him, then you’re treading on eggshells.

Don’t start out that way. Suggest it subtly, of course. Say you like hearing his voice or something. Or like his laugh. Work it into conversation then ask if you can call him when he’s free.

Otherwise you’re wasting your time with him.

SpringtimeSun · 29/04/2018 21:47

Had a great weekend catching up with female friends I haven't seen for years and years but seeing one with her new man has left me feeling right lonely. And then having to ditch 2 irons who I knew weren't going to be right for me has left me scunnered.

SpringtimeSun · 29/04/2018 21:48

How I felt/feel about OLD

pudding21 · 29/04/2018 22:02

vixen I'm feeling the same way about mr french. We leave each other voice messages but id like to chat sometimes but he always seems quite busy so I don't want to bother him. Bant is right on this one, I guess if he doesn't liked the suggestion we have to decide if it's a deal breaker. Should be what we want. That is a hard mindset for me to remember.

VixenSixen · 30/04/2018 06:24

Thanks Bant and Pudding ..... I'm definately going to pull him up on it this week.

I think approach it in a jokey way like "are we just going to talk over What'sApp all the time or do you fancy talking through this ancient method called telephone?'

Also Bant you are right, I am missing the sound of his voice too..... because I really like his accent 🤣🤣🙈

Well we will see how this pans out.

Thank you for the great advice guys - defo not settling for someone who doesn't want to talk on phone!

Jaxinthebox · 30/04/2018 07:16

mrsnog and I talk on the phone most days - he doesnt text. mr french and I WA but have spoken on the phone too. I like talking to him on the phone, his voice and accent is sexy hot but communication is easier for us on WA due to work etc.

TomHardysBitontheside · 30/04/2018 09:32

Urgent advice needed. Mr Academic has messaged again, so I've not been ghosted. Is it wrong of me to suggest date 3? Should I follow the WMLB rules and wait for him to suggest it?

Lovemusic33 · 30/04/2018 11:12

spring love it, sums up OLD.

I have hardly spoken to Mr Tinder since he left yesterday morning, although he seems fine about the dog thing he has gone a bit quiet and so have I. I’m not really sure what to say to him and after having a rubbish day yesterday (falling out with a close family member) I have just not had the time or mental energy to message him.

MinnieMul · 30/04/2018 11:22

I am also having a bit of a rubbish couple of days. My anxiety was bad over the weekend (not sure why either) so think I pushed the guy I have been dating away. I have tried to explain and he is working today so we will see what happens. I think if this doesnt work out I need some time off to focus on myself again.

RunsforCake14 · 30/04/2018 11:49

TomHardy I read back and you had a vague plan to meet this weekend? Personally, I like to be organised so I'd want to know if this date was going ahead.
But it's only Monday and in my experience men don't plan that far ahead. So perhaps just keep the chat going and casually drop in a suggestion for a date. Like "I fancy seeing X film at the weekend, do you want to join me".

I was chatting to someone new last night. He seemed normal and my type. Nice easy texting. But then he mentioned he was only looking for something casual to start with and see how it progresses. Then tried to turn the chat towards sex. I said no and he backed off. We carried on texting but it spoiled it for me.
Disappointing as he's been the first potential iron that I've liked and was quite keen to meet. Now I'm not sure whether to keep chatting or move on.

Lovemusic33 · 30/04/2018 11:59

Minnie I’m the same, when I feel like this I don’t really want to talk to anyone. I will also be taking time out if things don’t work out with Mr Tinder (which is probably what will happen).

TomHardysBitontheside · 30/04/2018 12:14

runs yes, we did mention next weekend a while ago. However he's clearly a typical man and doesn't plan. He has no kids so only himself to think about. But I have messaged and mentioned meeting up again and he's up for that. So I have date 3!!

TomHardysBitontheside · 30/04/2018 12:16

runs the whole sex chat thing is hard. Personally I don't do it unless I've met someone and we really fancy each other. I've had potential irons try to start it and I just stand my ground and say no. At least he kept on chatting and didn't run. Have you planned to meet yet?

MinnieMul · 30/04/2018 12:17

Love I feel like even though I try to explain it sounds stupid. He has been so nice generally so I am hoping he takes this well although he hasnt replied to me yet, not too unusual as he is at work and probably busy. I will be sitting on my hands to make sure I don't text again... may even turn my phone off until lunch.

Have you made any further plans to see Mr. Tinder.

RunsforCake14 · 30/04/2018 12:28

TomHardy good news about date 3

We made vague plans to meet next week one evening. But I've got a lot of work on at the moment which is spilling into the evening so it could be a problem. And he has his kids most weekends, so that rules that out! It's not looking great for managing to schedule a date.
I may not even hear from him again as I didn't engage in his sex chat.

Skyrabbit · 30/04/2018 13:34

tom yay for date 3- nothing ventured nothing gained!!
runs I'm not a fan on the sex chat if we haven't met, and only then sometimes. I do if I have no intention of ever meeting them though 😳

I think I'm ready for an OLD break. There's only so many 55 year old potato heads that can't string a sentence together that I can take 😂
I've some more gigs coming up, so I'm going to focus on me for a while, and the potato heads can all go get mashed...

Lovemusic33 · 30/04/2018 13:39

Minnie I know what you mean, I don’t like telling people that I get anxiety because it’s hard for someone to understand unless they expereance it themselves. I’m pretty happy go lucky most days but occationally I just can’t deal with communicating as I need to focus on grounding myself, this usually involves me hiding under a blanket for a day and switching my phone off.

I have just had a long phone call with Mr Tinder, everything seems ok, he’s trying a few things out with the dog in hope he can keep her, he is fine about me not being able to have her, he’s going to message me later to arrange meeting up this week (after he finds out what’s happening with work).

MinnieMul · 30/04/2018 13:55

You sound the same as me Love

It is good that you have spoken to him. I am hoping I have the same chance soon. I think he finishes at 3 so fingers crossed not long to wait.

Swipe left for the next trending thread