Dh has been having an affair. He get a home in an hour. Please keep me calm.

[youspinmerightround]

Found emails and a receipt for flowers. The emails are just Facebook messenger notifications so I can't read what they say but he's addressed the flowers to "my love".

I'm in with the 3 dc. I'm going to be sick.

She knows he's married. They're Facebook friends.

I would change any passwords and read them now before he gets in

Personally I'd do it before he got home . Arm yourself with more facts for the conversation you need to have. Gives him less wriggle room x

Pretend you are not feeling well and spend a few days gathering evidence and all the paperwork you might need like his payslips, mortgage docs, passports ect

He will delete everything after you confront him.

If you don’t want to read them that’s fine, but they will be gone within an hour of him getting home I guarantee it.

Be warned he will probably deny it at first, most of them do.

If you confront him tonight then you need to demand to see the messages. Don't let him give you an excuse not to. Don't take any "if you trusted me" shit.

You need to see what those messages say.

If they're inconclusive or he's still trying to minimise it, then ask to see his phone, email account and bank account. If you're not going to snoop then he needs to show it to you.

Women like that make me ashamed to be female, i'm so sorry OP

I think if you are going to look it's best before so you can back up what your saying and know 100%

Where is he just now, OP?

If you don’t want to read them now change the password and take photos.

It sounds cold but get all the evidence you can, you need to have the upper hand x

I'd change the passwords and read those messages BEFORE he gets home because these men lie.

It's going to a long night.

I'm really sorry you're going through this.

Work out some excuses he may throw and think now how you will react.

Your all right he will delete evidence

He will delete it all guaranteed. You need to read them to see him for what he is. It will give you the ammunition you need to get through this

What a bastard.

I'd change passwords on laptop ASAP then read as much as poss before he gets home. If you confront him he may change passwords on his phone before you get to the laptop.

Is this going to be a fairly new thing? Ie would you have seen earlier email notificstions? I'm thinking deffo read as much as you can just in case it's an early flirtation thing rather than a full blown affair. One may be get overable when the other isnt.

Do it now while you have all us to support. What times he back? Where's he been?

Dont tell him yet. Say youre unwell tired stressed etc. Gather as much as poss then watch.

Assume he can delete them from his phone so I'd read and copy them now. Could you print them out and present him with them?

Pack his things and leave them outside the front door

I would also read anything I could read and take pictures if possible before you speak to him. Or just email it all to yourself if you can.

Lock yourself in bathroom. Text him asking where he is because you’re sat on the loo and got the shits. Nobody wants more info on poo statuses. Then you can compose yourself, look at laptop, etc

I'm so sorry, OP.

I'm not surprised you're in bits.

If you can hold yourself together long enough to gather more information, do that. But if it's beyond you, just tell him you know and let him fill in the gaps. Don't offer more information than you have to. Tell him to leave, right now, if you want.

While you're waiting you could collect useful things: the children's passports, birth certificates; your marriage certificate; banking information. Put it all somewhere safe where he won't be able to find it.

What a disgusting rat he is. I'm sorry you're going through this op.