I’m in a bind, can’t believe this is happening.

[LadyCafe]

I hope I won’t receive harsh judgment. I’ve been married for 10 years and we have children. I’m pretty happy in our marriage and love my husband. Yes, some of the passion and excitement is gone. Believe or not, I’m the one who intitiates sex and willing to try new things. DH has also been moody this past year. He doesn’t seem to listen when I talk and isn’t present. The kids always take a tole on the marriage as well.

I met a guy. A very good looking guy and he’s interested in me. It’s so tempting to take things further and I’m having a really really hard time saying no. He texts me, but not daily, which makes things confusing. I don’t know what he really wants. I mean, he wants sex but I don’t know if he wants a long term affair or not. Do affair partners contact one often?

Has this happened to anyone before? I honestly wasn’t looking to have an affair. I feel like it came out of thin air.

I can’t believe I’m talking like this and seriously considering it. I go back and forth, ie this is just for me to what on earth am I doing?!?

the mums I know don’t go out. Men seem to have more fun. Mums are always tired because they’re the ones with the kids all the time. But I need to have fun with friends... this doesn’t make me a 13 year old girl! I think it’s normal to want to have time with friends.

OP, it's normal to want to go out with friends, arrange it! I've moved a couple of times and your description is not true of the mums including SAHMs I know! We are all shattered but we all have girls nights out every now and then. We also meet for coffees. Make new friends! Playgroups, school gates, hobby clubs, local FB groups, wherever.

You and DH need more date nights. Do you like particular restaurants or films? What did you do together for nights out pre kids, can you get babysitting and do the same?

I've been in a similar place but I didn't let it go far precisely because of my children. I had kids to give them a stable upbringing with my wonderful DH and I wasn't about to mess that up. I suggest you think about your children and the one childhood they have before going further.