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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

An update on my 'To top off my crap year...' thread

999 replies

October · 17/04/2007 14:40

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Ifonlyhewould · 27/04/2007 12:32

You will get there. I think once you start to feel better about yourself you won't be so hung up on G, you will be back to strutting your stuff again

I'm doing ok thanks. Working on my wobbly bits in preparation for summer. Healthy eating and talking myself into maybe doing some exercise. The only part of me getting toned up lately are my fingers from all this typing!

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 16:37

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Fubsy · 27/04/2007 16:45

Could I join in? Im doing Slimfast and using my lateral thigh trainer at the moment, and when DP goes I can change me diet more easily!

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 16:46

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melminx · 27/04/2007 18:36

Hello all. my friend and i started our slim fast diets 2 weeks ago and was hard as hell fro first 3 days but surprisingly easy now. Although feel cheated as went to dentist wednesday had to have 2 very deep fillings that are still aching a little. side of mouth aches and feels bruised from loads of injections as local wouldnt take! am starving now stick me in a field and i'll be quite happy to stand and chew on a cows arse!!! but slim fast is great if you have will power.

Any news on mls? did she have a fab birthday? to be 29 again!

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 19:14

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Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 21:04

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Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 21:28

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Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 21:57

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mummytosteven · 27/04/2007 21:58

no you're not the s*dding computer just ate my post.

mummytosteven · 27/04/2007 21:59

and to recap what I was going to put .....

this is an issue to add to the list for counselling I suspect. from what you have said previously, he is happier ?more secure with you when you are unhappy/don't have external sources of happiness. maybe he thinks you are more likely to leave him if you are happy with your job...

Fubsy · 27/04/2007 21:59

Its jealousy, pure and simple, because you like your job! I dont "love" my job, but DP hates that Im not as pressured in mine as he is. (In a way I am, but the pressures are different, I have more autonomy, and I dont have a manager on my back checking what i do all the time, but I never finish my work - its never ending.) He also really resents me going part-time - he denies this, but we used to share the housework, but since going pt (I work 3 -4 days a week) Im expected to do it all, and thats one of the caises of our breakdown I think - I just cant bear the idea that Im supposed to spend all my non child looking after time doing housework, when DP gets to go surfing.

Sorry, now Im ranting.

re the slimfast, im doing it to try to retrain my appetite - when I did WW I would roam the house looking for something I could eat worth 0.5 of a point if that was all I had left. But since I tend to get the munchies in the evening, Im having slimfast the rest of the time, then I can have something more normal in the evening.

By the way, I am dead impressed that you might do some work with a craft mag! Which one? Will you be a guest designer or something?

Fubsy · 27/04/2007 22:01

MTS, tghats a good point. its another control thing isnt it, expecting to be the main source of happiness in your life and resenting any other!

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:01

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Fubsy · 27/04/2007 22:03

TBH, he may not even recognise that in himself, its not something most people would want to admit to, is it? But in a controlling person it would certainly make sense.

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:04

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Fubsy · 27/04/2007 22:07
Sad
Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:08

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Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:08

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Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:10

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mummytosteven · 27/04/2007 22:17

i agree with fubbsy - he may not CONSCIOUSLY realise he's doing this

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:20

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mummytosteven · 27/04/2007 22:22

is he unhappy in his job at the moment?

Original poster
October · 27/04/2007 22:25

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mummytosteven · 27/04/2007 22:29

hmmmm a bit stingy attitude that. suppose it all depends on whether he is 1)prepared to talk openly about it with the Relate counsellor and 2)whether he wants to change. Or at the very least if he could do the - when you say x, I feel y thing if he feels undermined, rather than being critical of you.