30 days no contact Thread no 3

[heartnothead]

Here we go with thread no. 3

Please do read my last post 1000 on thread 2.

Liza Is there a messenger app we could use instead that means we don't have to give out our phone numbers? I do like the idea.

I have totally lost my head!

I’m only on Instagram at the mo. It’s ok, just an idea.

What’s happened Geri? X

Yahoo messenger?

I just want to scream at him. He is either mentally lost or playing some nasty games.

What about kik? Think you can create a group chat on there?

I am happy to download it and create an account!

Me too! Going to do it now

Me too!

Okay I have made a group. Let me know your usernames and I will add whoever wants in x

I'm really sad to see some of you going through the struggles.
The first few days were literally awful, I had this crazy panic attack where it felt like every single negative emotion hit me at once, it felt so bad that I actually thought about self harming, I'd never do that but that thought came in to my head because I wanted to feel any other pain other than this. BUT I got through It, and so will you but I did various things to get out of that negative mind set. So this is what I did:
Had hypnosis videos on at night
Every morning played positive affirmations.
Went running whilst listening to these affirmations.
Made a list of things I wanted to achieve that I can start to work towards like new skills, cooking, career things.
Meditation.
Made a list of the guy I want and what I deserve and this guy didn't fit into it.
Gave myself a lot of self love and was selfish so pampered myself, went on spa days, went out to eat, movies...just all about me.
I basically took power back for me and realised if a man was gonna treat me so poorly then he's obviously not worth it and not for me.
I hope some of this helps if anyone fancies using any of it

Don't get me wrong, I have a wobble sometimes but I just go to my things to do list

So glad to hear you're doing well itsjustmarley!! I do a lot of things on your list and it has defo helped.

Ladies for the group chat- My username is Dolly3012xo. Start a chat with me so I can add you to the group x

I like your list Marley it’s inspirational.

Would like to join the group chat - is it on kik?

I have a notebook with post it’s in with how I like to live.

Have had this since before things finally ended with exbf.

I started it as dealing with his addiction was a headfuck.

Will post them later

Rejected it could honestly be the same man we are both upset about. Exactly the same. Really lovely to me and into me very quickly but had some personal problems to sort. Shuts down. It is really hard

Sorry that post stuck out to me but will read others properly now.

Oh and loses job. The same.

Welcome back guys! Join our chat on Kik x

pairedlife.com/breakups/importance-of-no-contact-rule

Really good article on no contact rule.

Here instead of sending it to him. Been good all day. It's getting dark and night is drawing in and I can feel the tears coming

I cracked and did send it. Hes seen it. No reply. I am going to have to delete his number aren't I. It's going to absolutely break my fucking heart. I feel sick

Rejected - maybe best to delete the no. Believe me I’ve been there before.

Here are some of my life quotes on the post its which I look at from time to time to try to keep things in balance

I have loving and fulfilling relationships
I make decisions with confidence
I keep company with people who have my back and best interests at heart
I am safe and the best outcome happens
I listen to my intuition/gut feeling
I conduct myself with dignity
I know my worth

I read somewhere how it’s best to put them in the present tense even if things are bad plus hope they’re not too ‘woo’

As I said I started these when my exbf was deep in his alcoholism (he probably still is)

Thank you for the positive affirmations. I have used similar ones in the past, but had forgotten how helpful they are.
I'm going to write some of my own, based on yours.
rejected I wrote similar things to you in my journal today. Even capitalised them for emphasis.

I deleted my ex's number when I was briefly really angry with him. I am glad that I did (most of the time). I can't forget his email though as it's so simple

rejectedwoman write his number down somewhere if you have to but delete it from your phone and whatsapp. I am finally over the checking whatsapp for the most part. I changed my settings so people can't see when they were last online and they can't see when I was. At one point I was checking it religiously too, and the worst part is he's on it constantly just used to ignore my messages.

I've seen 'my guy' today and yesterday at work. Today he basically ignored me, and me him to be fair. Yesterday he came over to say hi (I wouldn't have), and sent me a few boring texts, I did respond but as usual took him half the day to reply to me - I've ignored the last one. Still have that other guy pursuing me and whilst I'm not interested in him - wish I was as he's really nice to me - but it's made me see what effort is like. Getting responses quickly, getting added on social media, asking how my day/life/week is, messages every day. Everything I had in the beginning with the other guy until he dropped me and made me feel like utter crap.

Just downloading kik...happy to whatsapp too Liza if you like x

In tears again. Just received a mobile call from an unknown number, my heart leapt because I thought it was my ex. The guy then said he'd been given my number by a mutual friend and I felt sick with anxiety because my ex has been suicidal in the past and I thought he was a Dr or a police officer.
It was actually an enquiry for my tutoring business which has come via an existing client, so not through the normal channel. I don't know how I kept it together to talk about the 11+ while trying to recover from the shock.

Yes please meow, pm me your number