Emotional abuse is becoming severe please help

[Heartisbroken2]

I've name changed for this as I'm worried my Dh is on my trail. The abuse has been going on for years and I'm exhausted.
Name calling, shining torch in my face when I try to sleep, not helping me despite four kids and full time job, stalking me if I go out and ignoring me for days if I have a short evening with friebds( twice a year max). I cry quite a lot at the moment and get told to dry my eyes or "what the fuck are you crying for". I've been told I'm useless because I don't host dinner parties. My confidence is low and I have little time. Lately though the abuse has taken the form of long sermons or lessons about my deep character flaws. How my anxiety angers him And my delivery is all wrong. The lectures go on and on and I can't interrupt. I have to agree that he's right and I'm flawed. He then tells me what I need to do to change. If I try to infer that he needs to change he rants and storms off. I feel permanently sick to my stomach, I'm so tired of pretending. Everyone loves him and thinks he's amazing. My family don't but he's well and truly cut them out my life by treating them so badly and being unwelcoming when they stay. He causes the worst atmospheres with his physical presence alone. He storms about. My stomach dissolves in to bundles of nerves. I'm currently hanging on by the skin of my teeth. I sometimes think the only way to get away from him is to just end it all, but I know I have the kids to think of. I've tried to call women's aid but I can never get through. Anyone out there that can give some advice about how to communicate with him and tell him to stop

Hoolio I'm so sorry to hear that. You're so right. I can't let the kids witness this anymore.

I loathe him at the moment. I don't want to spend another minute in his company. I'm going to find a better future

Wishing you strength OP. A new and happier life awaits you all.

My dad managed to throttle all of my soul out of me from being a toddler until I was 15 and only ONCE did I have any marks on me.

He went for areas that were harder to bruise. Stomach, thighs etc.

I DESPISE my mother for not leaving. I will NEVER forgive her as long as I live

I became homeless at 15 to escape him

Mother what a coward your father was . No wonder you can't forgive. Your mum allowed it to continue you poor thing. My husband plays the game of bear baiting with me. He doesn't often include the kids. He's such a coward I want to blow his cover and reveal to the world what a pathetic specimen of a man he is. A big bully who has the emotional intelligence of a four year old.

Perhaps you should blow his cover, as long as it's safe of course. He sounds pathetic, like all abusers are. Xx

Please plan your leave @Heartisbroken2 None of us on here will ever sleep properly until you do!!! We're all very worried. Do it for your kids xx

You need to tell your family, they can help you, support you and give you a safe haven. I have had my fair share of emotional abuse, I left it for nearly 5 years, to which has really mentally disturbed me. You can seek help from charities, your doctor and any online and over the phone help.

Heart I know from my own story how hard it is to leave. I don't know why that is but it's the same for most abuse sufferers. Just know in your own mind that you will manage to. When you can manage it. And you will be doing the right thing. Even if you don't believe yourself you can trust the opinions on here. Lots of threads are full of nonsense being talked by the responders but this type of thread tends to be full of people who have been through same and know where your head is because we've been there. you can trust what you read from us even if right now you can't quite trust yourself. Take care.