Went on a date and I'm not sure if he likes me?

[gaynor83]

We have been communicating for quite a while via Facebook and decided to meet.
I went to visit him and meet for drinks. We seemed to get along really well and the conversation flowed.we did kiss and there seemed to be an attraction. He suggested that we spend the following day together too. We ended up having a nice day, he cooked for me. When I left we hugged and it was slightly awkward I wasn't sure what to do. But it seemed ok.
When I got home I texted to say thank you for the date and I had a good time.
His reply came this morning, he said "Glad you had a good time and got back safely. I am knackered too. You are welcome and were a good guest. Glad we met x
What do you make of that?
I'm not sure if he is keen or not and it seems not to need a response. ?

If that is the way he usually talks/texts I think it is positive. Sounds formal, but some folk are like that . Stop worrying!

Maybe he is just not very good at texts some people find it difficult to express themselves via text ..

His previous texts are in the same vein. So I think it's ok. I'm glad he finally responded anyway.
I hope it goes well but I will try not to get too hung up.

My OH used to text like that. His original text asking me out for a drink was like something written by Lord Melbourne.

Haha some people are I guess

He's a lot more relaxed now, 4.5 years later.

You don't need to make any more suggestions. The ball is in his court now.

You travelled to him last time, you booked a hotel, you stayed over with him instead of using your hotel room, you went to all the bother. Let him do that if he contacts you again. Cooking you dinner was the least he could have done in those circumstances.

In the meantime, start finding ways to meet other men. If you have several irons in the fire, you'll care less.

Oh yeah, and if he contacts you about visiting you, don't have him staying with you and don't sleep with him.

Yeah, you're right. I guess I will just see what happens anyway. Will try to keep things on an even keel.

I think he actually sounds quite keen but doesn't want to seem pushy. reciprocation ... in due course' is kind of saying I'll wait until you are ready but also that the decision is yours.
If I was you I'd keep on chatting on FB and then suggest the next date. I suspect if you don't suggest something he will think you're not interested, especially as he had to ask you for a proper goodbye.

Oh.

Nah, not seeing this going well.

All of my previous answers were assuming that this was a scenario where you'd been chatting for a few days up to a couple of weeks and didn't know each other well yet. You know, a normal first date. Not this ridiculous year-long buildup hotel-booking farce.

You are far too over invested in this. Spend some time building your own confidence rather than worrying about texts. I mean that nicely.

Sorry but it sounds to me like he was hoping for sex when you were at his place. I might be totally misreading it but I wonder if that is why he went all cool.

I've been following this thread with interest. Sorry op but I had the same thought as Olivia. Second date at his (I think it was second date if I remember correctly) he was probably hoping for sex. The time between messages would've an issue for me, I've just stopped seeing a man because of this exact reason.

Actually it was all one date wasn't it? Evening out, then OP stays over at his house instead of at her booked hotel. He cools off the following day.

It might be as simple as him having anticipated sex with a woman who conveniently travelled to him, then lost interest when he didn't get it. In which case, he's no loss.

Nope.

FFS

wise words nettle

I think you are investing way too much in this and need to step back. I f he is interested he will ask to see you again, but in the meantime do not put your life on hold. Get out there and do things and if he gets in touch he can see you are living life to the full. Please do not be tempted to get in touch as he may simply not be ' that into you'.

Your date is still sounding like my DH did. Not everyone is gushy and into social media talk. Physical distance and hesitating are affecting you both.

After a year of corresponding you should know each other a little better than you seem to, so I suggest you try to relax about this, keep up your other social engagements and see how things go. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Surely he was 'into social media talk' for a full year whilst he was chatting to the OP on Facebook?

Unless your DH requested that you travel 40 miles to see him on a first date after corresponding for a year, I'm not really seeing a correlation between the OP's circumstances and yours.

I still think the balance of probability is that he likes you but doesn't know if you like him. So I wouldn't personally leave it for him to make the next date suggestion. I'd float a general suggestion and see what his response is before writing him off.

He seems quite stilted... where is the enthusiasm?! Hope youre feeling ok op, keep it on the back burner and meet other people in the meantime!!

She corresponded with him for a year, travelled 40 miles to see him, booked a hotel room, stayed at his house, in his bed, kissed him and texted him several times afterwards. He knows that she likes him!

Please don't egg the OP on to contact him again. Let him do some bloody work for a change. She needs to look after herself now, and explore other options. If this man contacts her again, it's a bonus.

I disagree NettletheElf. They have effectively met once, at the end of which op walked away and had to be asked for a kiss. The guy could well be uncertain after that. And why do you say 'do some work for a change'?