30 days no contact - Thread no 2

[Mumanddadtoone]

As the last thread is almost full, thought I'd start a new one.

This is for all of us who are trying to do at least 30 days without contact with an ex.
So whatever your reasons for instigating no contact please feel free to join in and we can all support each other.

Just had a missed video call off him on whatsapp? Don’t know if he done it by accident or if he meant it. Do I say anything?

dolly ignore it. You’re doing so well. Don’t cave x

I’m just worried that he meant it and now thinks I’m ignoring him. Even if it was an accident he was clearly on our chat so that’s big enough of an ego boost for me. Nearly at the end of day 3. I’m not ruining it for him

Day one done. Had several crying jags: I had to drive past the end of the rosd that we lived on this morning and evening; and watching my friend play with our cat also broke me up as it reminded me how much he enjoyed playing with her too. Just keep imagining how sad he must be feeling at losing both of us - despite everything.
Too tired to read earlier posts, but wanted to check in. Hope you're doing OK.

Well it’s now 30 days.

I do feel better than I did at the beginning but I can’t say I’m totally over it.

I still feel hurt and sad but I’m not going to contact him.

Can’t believe that he would want a relationship with someone like her but I suppose they’re both at the same level.

Anyway this thread has been a lifeline to me and I will continue posting.

Dinner- hope you are ok. Take care and we are all here if you need us.

Iris- sorry you haven’t had a great day. Its the associations that are the worse! But that does start to fade with time.

Heart- congrats on 30 days! That is such an achievement! It’s so good you went to that wedding. Keep your chin up.

I’ve just woken up from some very unpleasant dreams. I’ve convinced myself stbxh is at home with some other woman,all cuddled up in bed with not a care in the world. I also know logically that nothing could be further from the truth but the mind is a powerful thing! But whatever is happening, I know I’ve got the better end of the deal because I have our beautiful dd snoring away beside me and I love her more than anything! I’m so lucky.

Day 13 for me. Let’s hope it’s not unlucky!!!

Liza 13 is just a number and its closer to the goal of 30 days. Good luck with today.
Heart Congratulations! I don't think anyone expects to be totally over it after 30 days, but as you say, it is easier.
dinner Hope,the social media break helps.
dolly It doesn't matter what he thinks. The 30 days NC is for you!
Ami sorry about the guy turning out not to be single. There is someoneout there who is right for you!
meow spot on. Tough break that you have to work with him occasionally. Whenever you do, try keeping in mind some really nasty thing he did, while behaving as professionally as possible.
Best of luck today everyone. I know Sundays can be hard for lots of us.

storm have a great time at the concert and kick ass with the fun you'll have listening to the band.
anna it is hard chatting like a stranger to someone that you still love, before you see him remind yourself of why you are separating. I also imagine a transparent shield around myself whenever I have to deal with someone nasty or difficult.
geri there's a reason you're not with him. There are much nicer people out there.
anxious I am sorry things are so difficult. It's tough being a single parent, especially when other things are depressing. You will be OK. just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Try and do something nice for yourself everyday, doesn't matter how small.

Thanks iris. Hope you have a good day today

Day 10

Don't really know what to say. I don't want it to be over but am giving up.

Having a bit of a wobble today and he's popped into my mind a lot. :( I just don't get why he doesn't like me and I don't get why I'm so desperate for him to like me. He's just like my ex, overly critical, hard to please and hot/cold. I need to stop being attracted to these type of guys and I don't know how to. Argh. Hope everyone's having a good Sunday and staying strong. I haven't contacted him and won't, I guess that's the good part of taking this NC route. In time you do just start to actually give up and realise you're worth more, but it still hurts.

Exactly the stage I’m at meow, sometimes I would still love to text just to see if I still exist in his world but what’s the point?! I won’t get the answers I want and end up getting upset. Keep strong

I might have to join

Had ‘the chat’ on Thursday. We still have strong feelings for each other but circumstances mean it’s not easy for us to be together. He says he’d rather ‘go back to being friends’ and that he wants me to be his muse - WTF?!

I did really well for 24 hours. Then sent him a nice message based on something he’d said to put himself down that I hadn’t responded to at the time and wanted to tell him that he didn’t need to feel bad about that.

Then he sent me a hope you have a good day message the next morning, with kisses, which I ignored all day - and then I replied to say that things have changed and he can’t pretend they haven’t. He replied to tell me he wanted me to know he was thinking about me. I said that he’s hurting me and kissy messages and messages like that make it harder.

That was 24 hours ago and so many times today I’ve wanted to message him but have resisted.

Thing is, I still have hope that we can reconcile but I know I deserve better. And WTF is this muse rubbish all about? What’s in that for me?

I’m going to crumble. It’s been 24 hours exactly. Resisting for all I’m worth. Which is more than he values me. Have to keep telling myself that.

Stay strong tygr and welcome. Whatever he responds with is definitely not going to make you feel better. Try to make it through to bedtime and face a fresh day tomorrow

Keep going tygr. It will be worth it.

I've had several flashbacks today, visual images and now lying in bed craving his arm around me.

Reminding myself of the horrible things he has said is helping.

Day 2 done.

Keep strong tygr. It does get easier as the days go on.

Congrats on day 2 iris!

End of day 13 for me. Still hurts but I’m doing ok.

Been a tough day.

Had to see him again DD drop off.

It's like he has forgotten what he said to me last week. He thinks im ignorning him.

I dont even know anymore.

I give in to easily even if its a pathetic non conversation relating to DD.

Going to listen to the hypno clip tonight. Bye bye bastard!!

Morning everyone. Had my phone off for most part of the weekend. I hope everyone had a lovely weekend. Day 5 for me today. Last time I was on day 5 and decided to contact so I am adamant to not message.

How is everyone getting on?x

He has said something which has made me want to email him and explain my actions.

But then am I falling back in to the trap - I know he doesn't think twice about me when messaging the other woman.

GeriT- how long since you last spoke? Write the email and don't send

We speak at drop off and if there are messages about DD.

In terms of anything outside of that 11 days.