30 days no contact - Thread no 2

[Mumanddadtoone]

As the last thread is almost full, thought I'd start a new one.

This is for all of us who are trying to do at least 30 days without contact with an ex.
So whatever your reasons for instigating no contact please feel free to join in and we can all support each other.

Good luck iris xxx

Lots of

Everyone is doing so well. Keep it up.
It really does get a little easier. Almost at day 7. But I still get those weak points where I want to message.
The one thing that stops me is losing power and waiting for a reply. That part feels awful. And then the cycle of addiction starts again and it makes me feel rubbish

What do you the guys think when we don’t message them? Do you think they even notice? Or just play it cool?

Fuming fuming fuming.

What an absolute selfish dickhead.
Let DD down today.

Hugs GeriT I've had a few of these moments. Have now decided to keep from my DC that daddy is coming to see them in case he doesn't.

rhubarbginn I reckon they probably think different things, depends on the circumstances really. Some probably don't even notice. Some are probably curious but not enough to bother, and then some probably do notice but are being stubborn and want to wait and see if we crack lol. I think mine personally hasn't noticed until maybe today and is now just being stubborn as he knows I said I'd contact him, so he can't be bothered either. That or i'll get a message tonight that i'll ignore.

I'm definitely in a much stronger place at last. There is nothing worse than feeling you have totally lost power and control of your feelings. I hate acting weak when I know I'm not.

It’s really lovely to read about people getting stronger. Let’s help those that are just starting out. Well done everyone whatever stage you are at and good luck Iris for tomorrow. Fresh start

Feeling awful this morning. There were texts exchanged yesterday. Focused on DD.

I stayed 100% focused on her.

I don't know if I still carry on counting my NC days.

Though I had so many realisations about how its over. I want to scream them at him but realise there is no point.

Hi all,

I'm on day 5 of NC after partner left me. I am devastated as the parting was my fault. I so wish for him to contact me or keep thinking should I contact him and ask to meet. He is living with his parents about 2 hours away.

I miss him so much, finding this incredibly difficult....

Morning everyone. Day 2 for me. Just keep thinking that this time next week I will be on day 9 and that is keeping me determined. Also the rose tinted glasses have come off and I am seeing him exactly for what he is.. a c*.

Iris- I am thinking of you today. Stay strong and know that you are making the right decision.

How is everyone doing today? What day is everyone on?

Lots of love and strength ladies xxx

dram10dram- Welcome. I hope you find the strength and support in this thread. Just know that we are all in the same boat and that we are here to be a shoulder to cry on. Day 5 already! You are doing so well. Keep it up xx

Day 11 for me!

Thinking of you, Iris.

Keep going Dolly, as each day passes you do get stronger!

Geri T- I say I’m on day 11 minimal contact as I have to speak to him about things regarding dd. But we haven’t spoken about our relationship in those 11 days. It was like I was picking a scab and if you keep picking it it just gets worse. (Sorry for the disgusting analogy there but it’s the only way I can think to describe it!) he wasn’t giving me the answers I wanted and I was going slowly more insane. So I had to take action. Now it’s purely about dd. I sometimes wonder if he thinks about me and what I’m up to but I’m the grand scheme of things what does it matter? I’ve got to move in with my life for my dd and at the end of the day it’s his loss.

Love and strength to all you gorgeous ladies today, whatever day you are on.

So many typos in that last post! In the grand scheme of things!

I guess technically it's Day 0 again for me as I have had to contact him regarding work AND seeing him later. But I think I'm being harsh on myself going back to the beginning each time as I think it'd be about Day 17/18 if I didn't. I feel SO much better. I honestly don't want to see him today and didn't want to message him this morning.

Just realised whatsapp is down today so seen I've had a missed call and messages from him. Anyway think of me having to see him for hours and act like everything is okay. Hope it doesn't take me back as I've been doing so well.

I'm on day 5 but I find myself just on his Instagram sometimes, like, I don't scroll through it or look on all his pictures, I just go on the page and then come off....lol that's weird isn't it.

I have a date on Sunday anyway with a seemingly nice man. He's really attractive and is keen on me so it's quite a nice distraction and hopefully a 'link breaker'

itsjustmarley- You go girl! I am sure you will have a great time on your date.

I am sat at my desk thinking about how mind blowing the sex was and upset I am that I am never going to have it again

dolly thank you I'll have a nice time.

Nooo there's plenty of guys who give good sex, not just him. He was by no means God's gift to sex Lol, I've thought that about some guys I've dated but then when you move on to the next they're also good. Don't think about what you miss because it'll set you back.

Hello.

Can I join too? I've almost completed day one of NC....2 hours to go. I've never felt so low in my life....x

Iris good luck with move and start of NC

Dolly glad glasses are off. This will help.

Meow do you need to communicate by text for work? Glad you are feeling better and hope seeing him today doesn't set you back.

Good luck everyone today.

I haven't text for 6 days. Really struggling today. I want to text and say i get by the ghosting it is over but what a shit way to do it and when he misled me so badly saying how into me he was and how good it was. The only thing stopping me is the fact he ignored my previous ones. I don't even know if he is ok. Don't know if he is off sick from work, been sacked, left. The unknowns drive me crazy.

I’m getting a bit obsessed with thinking if stbxh ever thinks about me and what I’m up to? After 8 years he must do, right? On the whole I’m still feeling positive about everything but it’s this one thought that drives me mad. Everyone it pops in my head I am having to actively push it out. Guess it’s gonna be like that for a while

dolly I at least don't have that to think about as it was not that good, a bit boring to be honest. Shame because he was a good looking guy.

Itsjustmarley enjoy your date and keep us updated. Nice to hear moving on stories.

Day 36 here! To be honest I think I am there now. I have had a bit of a flirty thing going on with another guy and he has taken my number and text a few times. I'm hoping I may see him over the weekend but no definite plans. Exciting times

LizaJane85 - I know exactly how you feel. 100%

It's even worse with OW involved. I miss him:(

Glad you are doing so well Ami. Have a great weekend!

Thanks dinner! Just been looking at flats online so I feel a bit better now.

Glad I’m not alone Geri. I’m getting better at controlling my thought processes now so with keeping my mind busy I have some of the positive energy back.

You’ll meet someone far better in the sack, Dolly! I wouldn’t let this thought control you.

Love to all

Its been about three weeks for me. Some of the desperate despair has reduced, I think its just not physically possible to sustain feelings that intense, eventually your body just says "look, I'm out of all the chemicals so I'm going to dial it back now".

I'll have to see him and his girlfriend on Tuesday night at a gig at a small venue with what used to be "our" friends but are now back to "his" friends. I'm dreading the possibility that I'll have a huge panic attack when I see them or hear their voices and have to leave after being a spectacle, but I WANT TO SEE THE BAND AND IM GOING! I'll cope or I wont, but either way it'll be over by Tuesday bedtime and then I'll have to deal with however things are.