You were completely blindsided. In less than 24 hours, everything changed, and the full impact is probably still sinking in. I imagine you are feeling numb, confused, furious, sad, lost and a whole host of other emotions. The life you knew vanished suddenly, and you haven't yet built your new life. It will come, but it will take time. Thank goodness you have good friends to support you along the way.
As ProphetofDoom said, he has come up with a narrative that justifies his deplorable actions - makes him look OK, and you an over-reacting nutter. Maybe he even believes it himself. But he has to come up with something vaguely 'acceptable' because he can't bear to think about how badly he has behaved. He knows everyone else, if they knew the truth, would find his behaviour abhorrent. In spite of his sharp clothes and good smelling cologne, he is a deceitful, dishonest, selfish and cruel person.
I struggled for months (maybe years) to grasp the actions of ex-dp. There was no neat or simple explanation. One Saturday, we had a life together, and by Sunday afternoon, it was gone. I remember feeling a physical pain, a tightness in my chest, a throbbing head, and a pit of the stomach ache. It was incomprehensible that he could simply turn his emotions off, like a tap, and move on without seeming bothered. It became clear that he hadn't been honest with me for a long time.
Just accept that there are some things you'll never understand, but be grateful the 'real' person revealed himself to you - no matter how painfully. It means you will have a different future than you thought, but a better life eventually.
Keep taking it a day at a time, hour by hour, even minute by minute. Be patient and kind with yourself. Time is what will heal - as trite as that sounds. Yes, it will get better.