Advice please, I am being stalked

[user1491774393]

Hello everyone. I dont really know where to begin and this is complicated. I am being stalked online and offline, I have also been disgustingly slandered and harassed. Stopping short of deleting all of my social network accounts I dont know what to do. I was hacked a few years ago, and things that I had written went on to be plagiarised, then I was subjected to a smear campaign. This was really bad, It ended up in me having a mental breakdown and attempting suicide. The online harassment is still happening. I already had post traumatic stress disorder before this. I have told the police, I have screenshots of the weird cryptic harassment I am on the receiving end of almost daily. Removing my social network accounts would render me pretty much isolated due to disability. This has made me beyond depressed, It also made me relapse back into having an eating disorder and I am now awaiting assistance from mental health services because of this unrelenting and cruel harassment. Any advice would be appreciated, I just dont know what to do. My children and I had to leave our home because of this, which was a massive upheaval for all of us. This is actually making me ill. Sorry for moaning but you ladies give the best advice.

Yes NettleTea I am aware of the name change. I am not vilifying her by asking questions. I am shocked that the police are doing nothing if OP has had to move house twice because of this, but maybe if OP's distress when reporting these incidents have resulted in the full extent of what is actually happening being overlooked.

sorry forumdonkey hadnt read your last post and see you are helping. That list makes a good start to compile info to take to police.

chronological will also be good.

this way you are also doing alot of the donkey work for the police and pulling the facts from the emotion of the piece. It makes a much more comprehensive dossier to present.

OP

Your clearly in a bad way at the moment and even though I can't really understand what it is that is actually happening to you I can only imagine the stress and upset this must be causing you.

I think the very best thing you can do right now is work on getting yourself as strong mentally as possible so you have the energy and inclination to fight the bullying. To be able to get mentally strong you really need to either write down what has been happening or print off you posts on here, take them to the DR and tell them how it is making you feel.

You cannot be expected to deal with all the other stuff until you are feeling stronger in yourself!

Please do see you DR or maybe a talking therapy type counsellor may be able to help you get everything clear and help you decide how best to play your next steps.

It's clear you cannot continue to live like this it must be exhausting and horrible!

I'm sorry you are going through this and hope you can get everything sorted.

I developed an awareness of this after weird goings on, also the Lady I spoke to several times at Paladin told me that anything put online, even in pm is not secure or private. I had people (possibly the same person) sending me friend requests and their banner pics where photos I took that I hadn't published online. Logical explanation please?

the internet isn't secure - PMs aren't, emails aren't - anything on line is possible because nothing is secure. your laptop has some security built into it though and the average person who is online wouldn't know how to get into it - its not that easy. you would need to be looking at some pretty dodgy sites to get copies of software and the chances are your computer would be hacked by someone who does know what they are doing before you can download the software and try and pass it to someone else.

I'm sorry this sounds harsh but your really mixing reality with fiction, your paranoia has overtaken you.

FWIW I agree with someone else, I would think this is your DP/DH doing this to you.

Thank you nettletea, and forumdonkey, thanks especially for the list. I will use this. I should have asked on here when this first started happening.

Peggyundercrackers, I am not mixing reality with fiction at all, I am trying to keep this as conscise and as simplified as possible, it's not something that a lot of people can relate to, but it is what it is.

I did initially have suspicions about my partner, The medical records I have at home I actually got after this, as part of an appeal for pip. My dp has a full time job, only socialises with colleagues and hasn't got time for this, a few people offline have told me to be wary of him but I honestly dont think this is being done by him at all. He can be a grumpy b*stard but he wouldn't be malicious like this.

Dodgy sites, maybe the forum I mentioned, I dowloaded a photo uploader to use the site I mentioned, I used to use cannabis to treat ptsd and anorexia, I dont anymore and havent for years, I only ever smoked a little too and it did help (flame away if you wish, I'm a grown up and I can take it). The photo uploader was called irfanview, it's basically a teamviewer, I didn't know that when I used the site, which I actually liked visiting because some of the posters where actually decent people with compassion that actually wanted to help others. That is why I don't think it's my dp but people from the internet. DP wouldn't want to watch me go from being happy and healthy to a blubbering wreck, a shadow of my former self, he could have just left me at my lowest but didn't. He even put up with me blaming him because initially I did. And his family (they wouldn't do this, they are decent and kind people also). He has gotten nothing from this, apart from watching me slowly be chipped away at, and lose independence and autonomy, which isn't nice because he does care about me, he is a good dad and we are happy.

OP

Have you thought more about going to the DR?

Or could you look at some form of therapy?

Not because you are mad or crazy but to get yourself in a stronger, calmer place?

I imagine it's very difficult to see the wood from the trees at the moment.

The very few times I have smoked weed, I have ended up psychotic and paranoid for weeks after. Believing people on tv or on the street are talking about me, thinking song lyrics are aimed at me, all sorts.

Just saying.

OP, I'm talking purely from my own experience only here so feel free to ignore.

I have a family member who suffers from paranoia. The list a PP put together above is an exact replica of conversations (every conversation) with my relative.

He can't have driven over a nail - someone is deliberately putting nails in his tyres.

He gets 'vicious nasty abusive' emails from close relatives- I've seen the full conversations described and they're nothing more than asking for clarity in a conversation, or sending links to an article that may be of interest, but he reads a nonexistent malicious undertone in this.

He constantly insists that various people are 'out to get him' and this has been 'proved' - asking who, how, why, is met with an angry defensive response 'don't question me'

I read up on paranoia and one of the things that really hit me is that in some ways the delusion that you are important in other peoples' lives is in some ways comforting. That is exactly this person. It is so fantastically rare for anyone to care enough about anything outside their own little life bubble enough to actively create such a huge campaign against someone.

I'm kind of trying to explain why people are saying that what you're saying sounds concerning.

Please ignore if you wish and I hope this doesn't cause any offence.

P

Something that occurred to me from one of your initial posts - how can you be sure that your cat was stolen and didn't simply go missing?

PeanutButter makes a good point - why would somebody be putting all this effort into a mass campaign against you? And employing 'winged monkeys' in the effort too??

People just don't care enough unless there's something in it for them, so what could possibly be their motivation?

Either this is your DP gaslights no you because he wants power and control over you, or darling, your mind is deceiving you. I really hope you're ok OP.

I'm not paranoid. I am also not you, I only ever smoked to influence an appetite, and never enough to induce paranoia or psychosis.

I read up on paranoia too. I also stopped using an adequate pain relief because there was a chance that it may (or may not have) contributed to anxiety, I mentioned that I hadn't smoked the small amounts I used to consume for a very long time now.

I'm not paranoid, delusional, mentally ill or any other slur. I am legitimately fearful and anxious following these events. You said yourself it's fantastically (interesting choice of word) rare, so it obviously does happen.

I'm not paranoid, delusional, mentally ill or any other slur. I am legitimately fearful and anxious following these events

OP I've heard this a lot of times before, to be honest so many times I've lost count. The difference in my situation is that I know that the 'events' were not as perceived. I'll bow out as my personal experience is influencing what I say. No matter what is really happening, I hope you get the help you need x

So, because you have heard it many times before you know better than I, or the mental health professionals that I saw, or Paladin? Seriously. Thats the problem with judgeypants, It's narrowminded and thinks it knows it all, Ceases to be open to the idea that something is actually happening due to a pre concieved bias that one has superior intelligence or a failure to think logically about a situation regardless of how alien or weird it may seem. When this first started happening to me my sister told me to tthink logically about it. I actually laughed because out of the two of us I am the logical one.

If the shoe was on the other foot and this had happened to you, would you find your comment helpful or supportive, probably not. It's fine though. I exhausted all avenues of mental health help. It didn't stop the harassment. Thanks though.

People have threatened me, stolen our pet, stolen my work, accessed my computer somehow, registered my simcard to a flat in a different city and you tell me that I need to see a doctor because that is the problem according to you. I'm lost for words, and that never happens.

Could you give us a clear list of what has happened to you?

It might help us to understand.

Hellofromme My cat always came back and never ventured far. I mentioned the next day getting a weird friend request (which I obviously did not accept) and then seeing someone mention on a board I used to visit that distinctive and unusual named kitty was their cat now.

For clarity OP can you give some indication of things in the questions I put? It may help us understand more clearly.

The plagiarism - was this writing on a word document or a blog etc?

OP are you wealthy aside from your DP?
Sorry for such an intrusive question, but I'm trying to think of motives.

Also, getting back to your cat. When did this happen and have you any idea of who could have her? Do you know their whereabouts?

And can you tell me what type of work was stolen? Is this actual physical theft of something?

I know it sounds like I'm incredibly nosy, but I am trying to think of practical ways to help you. Like I said earlier, it sounds exhausting and all-consuming and so much seems to be piling up onto you. Let's see if our collective minds can unpick it.

The plagiarism was written work, stuff I just ad libbed really, It was deleted from social network accounts and not by me. I contacted the writers guild about this, because it was people of another nationality that used my work and I wasn't well versed on copyright claims, I didn't copyright it anyway. I just write what I feel and if people relate to it thats fine. Obviously no one relates to what has been happening to me recently and I thank you for giving me your time, patience and understanding.
I think that was why I was actually hacked. I did contact the woman that did this to me, she denied through others but said nothing herself. She isn't going to admit it anyway is she?

Forumdonkey I will do this shortly. Thanks for the prompt.

It was deleted from social network accounts

Anything posted on forums such as MN belongs to MN, as far as I understand. Similarly on websites such as blogs run by the BBC, or FaceBook.

I agree Welshmoth with some more information and clarity it could help, even composing a document to had over to authorities, esafety IT security etc. There's a wealth of knowledge, experience and information that can be gained from the many posters on MN. It's incredibly difficult without more information

Just seen your update OP

When did this all start? As in which year? Also anything happened recently? If yes when and what was it?.

I have also been disgustingly slandered and harassed; Strangers treat me with contempt, often saying rude an inappropriate comments to me in front of my sons. I could list a few examples, Instead I will just mention supermarket workers and skat. There has been worse than that though, much worse, prompting me to complain and then feel shame because I made a fuss out of something that shouldn't even be an issue, even to the point of being invited to speak to the manager yet declining because it's too draining and degrading. The one I mentioned previously was a separate incident entirely when a woman was fired for gross misconduct. I complained online, helpful lady contacted manager then they called me afterwards which was when I was told that she had seen something about me online. I didn't ask what, I was too upset.

I have screenshots of the weird cryptic harassment I am on the receiving end of almost daily. In what form are they taking, fb posts, email etc and what do they actually say?; FB comments on my posts, inbox messages warning me about locking my doors and being drugged and raped, inboxes about hoping someone will find me, comedy references to stuff I dont like but the antagonists do, always unrelated to the things I post (Which are mainly cute animals, make up, art, singing, anti war stuff, environmental stuff, animal rights stuff, and petitions pertaining to that) Posts from a person that mentioned flashing my drive (I dont know what that is at all and my googling didn't educate me enough for me to understand either) and then them posting a meme that I have on my computer too but haven't used yet, then them jokingly saying they had stolen it from me.

I have had objects left outside my home, What has been left? Rotten foodstuffs of an unknown animal origin, books about stuff that I'm not interested in (Royalty, The Manhattan Project, Loads of Winston Churchills books, books about symbology) I did not keep them, I should have donated them because some were quite valuable and rare but I binned them because it just seemed odd to me.

I was being threatened with horrible things What were the threats ; Being framed, being kidnapped and the rest.

I have been heckled in public Who heckled you and what did they say?; I was called a rat on multiple occasions, called a child abuser (I'm not and this crushed me) Too much to mention and I already sort of answered this.

pushed over by a binman What happened? I reported this to the Council because they where his employer, I dont know if further action was taken because I left that house. His colleague witnessed this. I'm shocked he never aired a disagreement to this.

friends sister telling me that someone was asking others personal questions about me What did she say they asked? I asked her over a year after she told me this, I didn't realise it was significant til after and she no longer remembers who or what.

the theft of my intellectual property, also data protection breaches What were these? My medical record info being discussed on groups that I was a member of, stuff about my relatives, things from conversations with friends. Too much to comfortably type out here, but it was concerning and I am taking this up with the information commissioner. Writing was stolen, I know my pictures have been too.

My electronics were interfered How did you notice this? I noticed this when my conversations with people started to be posted where I would see them, not an algorythims thing, word for word conversations which made me suspect a keylogger , que me quizzing rather grumpily the other person(s) and them being dumbfounded and thinking I'm crazy. Also I bought a samsung phone to replace my iphone and somehow it was playing the sound of a baby monitor, I had no ads in the background. I was browsing recipes for cookies on google and had clicked no links.

A lot of my personal info was leaked onto memes. things about my family that I had never spoken of online What did kind of things did they say and how did you come across them? :Group invasion on facebook and other boards. Things about my birth injuries, My dad being irresponsible with a moped long before I was born, stuff about my late Nan and her legacy, her last will and testament (I know this is public but really), stuff about Uncles, my estranged brother too and my mother. Things about my sons , and my Dp's family. It was also on this specific and now removed fb group where they reckon they had framed me, prompting me to call the police and all that achieved was me being referred to social services and mental health services instead of them looking into what I said and submitting a data request to fb and other sites.

after my personal info was released what personal info was released and where? See above

Sorry this took so long, (Parenting and chores) It's brief but hopefully I have covered most of the issues. I have left some details out though.