Dating Thread 115 - come join us!

[InfoSec21]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

I don't like pubs much, and I'm always driving so can't drink, and there are very few soft drinks I like and if I drink more than one glass of mineral water then I feel like I'm drowning, and I don't drink coffee and think coffee shops are a waste of money and the tea is horrible.....but, I do all these things on dates because what the hell else do you do the first time you meet someone?

I really don't like the sound of Mr 11pm. Please ditch him. He is making you feel uncomfortable this early on and that's not right!

I am still slightly pissed off by Beardy trying to meet up with me "as friends" when he's dating The Other Iron and he clearly still likes me. Have been hitting Bumble and had a lovely chat with an affable chap earlier who dropped a few hints about meeting up.

He seems like a slow burner - the kind of guy who is just 'nice' and you have to spend time with to actually find attractive. I might suggest meeting him when I'm back from the weekend. Who knows.

Beardy is in a box. Here I go a-bumbling...

PS Really sorry to hear about Lois Lane. I know you were hoping for things to work out, InfoSec21. Onwards and upwards, eh?

Thanks for the shouts, onwards and upwards yeah. Back to dissing OLD again :)

Tell you what I always avoid on POF, people who put the county as their location. Could be miles away, for bring obstructive they get ignored :)

Being*

I have to say Beardy sounds like a right piece of work and not someone I would want to be friends with...if you're hanging around in case something happens in the future then he will do the same to you as he's doing to this woman now.

If someone isn't willing to bend even a little for someone else at this stage, not worth the effort mother

checks location details on POF...

I can't bear people who say "if you're genuine and honest, drop me a line" so you do. And they don't reply. Well I don't care if you don't like the look of me, but really, you made out all you wanted was genuine and honest, but it seems you want something else?
Or the guy last week whose message to me said "only reply if you want to" - well, obviously. I don't need your permission to do what I want!

Anyway, you get more views etc the more online you are and I've not been on at all this week.

pringlecat Don't like the sound of Beardy... wants his cake and eat it.

mother Mr11pm can do one too.

Well I got a 'not so nice' surprise this morning with a text from the man I finished with on Saturday (although he had distanced himself so I was probably doing his dirty work for him). So that upset me and took me a back a few days of the 'getting over' him (let's call him FA - functioning alcoholic). The message was all about whether I was still going to go to a gig that he is going to. I have my tickets - I'm going and if I see him, I'll probably avoid him.... he didn't need to text me about it.

Another one adding to the "don't like Beardy" camp pringle

Sorry Info but least no more fretting and wondering

Out Bit like "all messages answered" Yeah, right, of course they will be.

No, I agree. Personally I think he made a bad choice (I am clearly the better one!) but his current behaviour is sending red flags to me. I might see him again in the future but not any time soon. And in the meantime, I'm talking to other people. I have put him in a box in my head. And archived him on WhatsApp.

Well done pringlecat! There are better things 'round the corner.

Well, Mr Slow Burn literally just asked me out...

Mr Slow Burn seems like a nice guy. Not sure how much we'll have in common or if there will be any chemistry, but there are worse foundations than nice. And my current Bumble pic is a very honest, representative one so perhaps he will like me in person. You're always worried men on Bumble just swipe right to everyone.

I should make time to meet him for a drink, shouldn't I?

I don't even get past most profiles which is frustrating, always something bad in them.

pringlecat yep - meet mr Slow Burn.

Just catching up.

Sorry about Lois info
pringle I agree, you need to meet Mr Slow burn.

Help! He wants to talk on the phone. What do you talk about on the phone? Flirting is much easier by message. Thanks for all your help. I am already embarrassed.

Have a chat on the phone, it might rule him out, or in!

Ok but I don't think I can flirt on the phone right?

Lurker on this thread wondering what people think about this. Had a really lovely first date with a tinder guy last night, great spark etc, he made it clear on the date he wanted to see me again. The venue which he picked turned out to be v noisy and he was apologetic about it!Then this afternoon he has just said "we should do it again but you pick the venue this time!" I've had dates with more traditional guys who set up the time, place, venue - it's not red flaggy that he's put the ball in my court right? Been texting a bit today and I'm sure he is interested and genuine about wanting to see me again. How to play it?

Wow lots to catch up on!

Heart I think a phone 'date' is a good test. It's good to know you have things to actually talk about before you get to flirting, imo. If a conversation flows on the phone, it should be even better irl.

Info sorry LL sent bad news. I love your positive attitude though! Keep the faith

Pringle good instincts on beardy, and definitely give Mr Slow burn a chance. You never know!

Mother mr 11pm sounds odd. I agree to give him a miss!

The lovely Mr Web is away with his DCs at the moment but still messaging me plenty when they are occupied or in bed. He's saying all the right things at all the right times. I'm very invested. My instincts tell me this is a good one. Hopefully no big surprised ahead!

Princess I think that's quite a sweet thing for him to say actually, if he means it in an apologetic, self-deprecating way in that he acknowledges that his choice of venue wasn't great. He might be thinking he wants you to pick somewhere you will be comfortable.

I wouldn't see it as a red flag. You can take it in turns. I'd hate it actually is a man always called the shots and wasn't interested in where I might like to go.

Exactly what Bleachy said.

I agree with Once, Princess. To me, he has said the right thing there.