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Original poster

Dating Thread 115 - come join us!

999 replies

InfoSec21 · 22/03/2017 17:44

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread.
OP posts:
OutToGetYou · 06/04/2017 17:19

I would always reply if they asked me out - but if they just text 'had a nice time' sort of thing with no question and I didn't want to see them again, Id not bother to reply (after a first date).

Original poster
InfoSec21 · 06/04/2017 17:53

I had asked if she wanted to do it again, so it was a clear question rather than just saying I had a nice time. :)

OP posts:
Bant · 06/04/2017 18:12

Ok, info well it's done, she'll reply or she won't. Until then, She's Schrodinger's date..

Give it a day or two and then go back to OLD if she hasn't responded. Hopefully she will but this is what a bunch of the rules are about. Thick skin, people disappearing, all that..

OD is shit. Dating is shit.

There are several species of sea cucumber which change sex repeatedly, and also can have sex with themselves, and have offspring. Not that that would be my preference, but it would be a lot better than POF.

However, those species, when threatened, also expel their intestines out of their own anus at explosive speed, in order to distract their predators and get away. This reminds me of a fairly bad date I had once where I think the poor woman had irritable bowel syndrome. At least I'd met her in real life though.

Still better than POF

Original poster
InfoSec21 · 06/04/2017 18:33

Ha ha, all better than POF!!

Well, Lois Lane did reply and she said she hadn't felt a connection and so that was that.

I'm not taking this as a negative because:

A) I am at peace now, she replied.
B) not everyone can like everyone.
C) it was great practise since I hadn't had a date for aaaaaages.
D) she was ridiculously pretty so I was pushing my luck a bit there anyway.

OP posts:
Plentyoffishnets · 06/04/2017 19:07

Sorry to hear that info but you're firmly back in the saddle again and good you can see the positives

Original poster
InfoSec21 · 06/04/2017 19:26

Yeah won't pretend I'm not disappointed but it's okay. Just glad to have gotten a date really, good start back into things.

Had a Tinder message from someone nice this morning so will pursue that. She's a bit too glamour for me but will try not to judge yet.

OP posts:
Mermaidinthesea123 · 06/04/2017 19:33

Well I haven't dated as such but after hearing I was getting divorced three old flames from the 80's invited themselves over to my house for a cup of tea and a chat (not all at the same time obviously).
I can't say I was impressed, not one of them was house trained (leaving the toilet in a mess, dirty boots, not putting their cups on a coaster) and all they seemed to want to talk about was themselves and their sex lives. Oh yes and how beautiful I USED to be because obviously I am a hideous old bag now.
if this is the callibre of the meat market these days they can piss off. I'd rather be single.

Biddylee · 06/04/2017 19:52

Have been lurking on this thread - not quite ready for any dating yet (maybe in May...) so am living the experience through you guys Grin sorry....Blush

info Disappointed about LL but onwards and upwards!

Bant That is an episode of the Octonauts I haven't seen Shock Grin

mermaid They are old flames for a reason I guess.

DontSayIt · 06/04/2017 19:57

A lurker here ...

Last minute date offers i.e. just day before?

Any thoughts?

Bant · 06/04/2017 19:59

Ah bugger, sorry info. It's difficult when you get your hopes up.

Good that it's confidence inspiring though. Women on here say that dating boosts them, or brings them down. It's the same for us.

mermaid - that's a bit bollocks. Good to know you're in demand though, even if the quality wasn't great.

biddy - you've got to really hunt for it on Netflix

Bant · 06/04/2017 20:00

More context, dontsayit?

DontSayIt · 06/04/2017 20:07

well Bant, just started seeing someone. Last date just asked the day before, which was fine (I guess!). But don't want this to happen regularly, especially when very early days. OTOH don't want to play by random rules.

Maybe I should just trust my heart and instinct as situation arises?!

ThisIsTheRightTime · 06/04/2017 20:14

I've got a date (a real one) on Saturday after our initial coffee on Monday morning. He sounded so happy to speak to me this evening. Blush

Biddylee · 06/04/2017 20:28

Bant It's not on You Tube? Along with the very odd episodes of My Little Pony Shock

Dontsayit I don't like the sound of the last minute planning by your date. Trust your instincts. (and btw I nearly corrected the grammar in your username Blush Grin)

Thisis Good luck!

DontSayIt · 06/04/2017 20:31

yes, the instincts thing, I need to stop with the over-thinking Biddy! But if I'm not feeling an essential keenness I will have to step back I think ...

ThisIsTheRightTime · 06/04/2017 20:34

Thanks Biddylee! Smile

(I resisted the urge to correct Dontsayit's name too.) Grin

Biddylee · 06/04/2017 20:42

Dontsayit Yes - I think if someone likes you they will be keen and won't leave things to the last minute. If last minute doesn't bother you, that's fine but if it does then you are potentially setting yourself up for something that could become a problem very quickly.

DontSayIt · 06/04/2017 20:49

And I guess thats what the first dates are for, just seeing how things work and if you're compatible really. Rather than stressing out whether things are going your way or not and what to do about it...

motheroreily · 06/04/2017 21:41

I sent mr11pm a message and said maybe we can meet another day when we have more time. So we arranged it and he said what shall do, I said I don't mind, he asked again so I said shall we go for a coffee and he said what about something quieter.

Anyway he suggested the park.

I don't know but this just seems weird. Maybe I'm self sabotaging because I like being the one date wonder

UpYerGansey · 06/04/2017 21:49

mother why don't you suggest picking up coffees to take to the park. Then you'll have a chance to suss him out. If it's a nice day, there will be lots of people about, if that's what's bothering you (and not unreasonably).

Pavonia · 06/04/2017 21:54

mother quieter than coffee?! Seems weird to me.

motheroreily · 06/04/2017 21:57

It will be busy as the park's popular. I don't know. He doesn't like pubs, he doesn't like costa. I don't like going on dates at 11pm Confused

I might cancel

fortunacookie · 06/04/2017 22:33

I would motherO Shock

fortunacookie · 06/04/2017 22:34

Sorry about Lois info

Bant · 06/04/2017 22:38

mother

Yeah, I'd drop this. It sounds a bit like a chancer trying to get you to suggest Netflix and chill at his place

If it rings alarm bells with someone you don't know, listen to them.

You may be the one date wonder because you just haven't met someone who gets you yet, it takes time and effort. But it's worth it.

Or you can settle for someone who makes you feel uncomfortable, but I'd advise against it

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