Couple swapping

[user1484939839]

Hello

New name, you know....

I am on here a lot but not this topic.

Anyway....

Advice please....

Happily married - typical 2 kids mid 30s etc etc

Friends have suggested quite openly that we swap. We are due to stay at thiers tomorrow night, they live about 100 miles away.

We have a relaxed, chatty, friendly relationship with them. Been on holiday as couples. Not that long standing. No deep and meaningful discussions.

The haven't swapped before and neither have we. My husband and I had vaguely thought about it before kids with another couple but it never happened. This couple just sort of suggested we all try the last time we met up which was for dinner rather than staying over. Holiday means that boobs, bums, wobbly bits, and so on have already been exposed.

I have to admit, I fancy the idea, hubby too, and I texted just now to say ummmmm ok.

Thoughts?

Bad idea?

SH

I find the whole idea a bit icky. After you had sex with the other woman's husband, did you have a shower before you had "warm" sex with your own husband?

I find people who use the word icky really icky.

Cool. I'm not. I have dignity and high self esteem - unlIje the OP.

Bleurgh

CaraAspen

Cool. I'm not. I have dignity and high self esteem - unlike the OP.

Bleurgh

Consensual sexual outside of marriage isn't undignified or indicative of low self-esteem. No one need shame anyone for sex that causes no harm.

Grim, suburban? Yes.

Cara - that was my first thought too

Good God you are a judgy lot on here aren't you? Makes,me wonder whether some of you aren't a bit threatened/jealous,by the OP's post and also how well it went? Swinging is much more common than many pp would like to admit...

The OP being the most judgemental twat of all the posters here.

She didn't like the answers she got to her post but clearly it didn't matter to her anyway so why even bother asking?

YY everyone on the thread is vv jealous.

Do you mean did my husband get sloppy seconds?

No.

One of the few things we agreed was that sloppy seconds wouldn't occur. Without going into detail, other options were used.

This makes my skin crawl a little, I think if I was that bored wanting to have sex outside of my marriage or if DH was also a cheater interested in having sex with someone other than me within our relationship I would probably realise we aren't enough for each other, we aren't happy and we shouldn't be together.
That's just me though, each to their own (or not, in this case )

Swinging is hardly new.
Much of the judgement comes from hearing time and time again where these fantasies come from and how they play out.Theres three other people's expectations as well as the Op's.

So sloppy seconds is a no go but having some other blokes knob up you is fine? Er. Is that like standards then?

What do you mean standards?

What an odd thing to say.

It is nothing to do with standards it is because the guys didn't want sloppy seconds.

I'm not jealous.

The whole scenario makes me feel sad... a bit like watching happy people in a car in the opening credits of Casualty...

I hope it doesn't make you all sad in the long run, user.

I think some people are being unnecessarily rude to the OP. Even if she made different choices than you would have made yourself it doesn't give the right to be unkind. Everyone involved was a consenting adult.

Imagine if the other couple have filmed it (hidden camera - for future enjoyment!) and the OP and her Husband are now porn stars on t'internet! (Shudders at the thought of being recognised or my kids seeing it when they are older)

The OP has been unnecessarily rude to posters who joked about her question.

On Friday when the OP first posted they ended the post with

Thoughts?

Bad idea?

Therefore implying that they wanted opinions and thoughts. Which they got. But now that's wrong apparently.

I would not do it, totally up to you OP. Find it weird that they're bothered about sloppy seconds when they've been so intimate anyway.

I think I vomited in my mouth a little.

But hey, it's your marriage OP. Will you be doing it again?

Sloppy seconds? Is it just me that this sounds slightly teenage & absolutely vile to?
I don't really get swinging & I certainly wouldn't be happy to send DH off to fuck someone else but hey, whatever works for others.

I hesitate to mention this, given the extensive vegetable discussions, but do you think that the sloppy seconds issue is perhaps not at the core of this debate. I have to admit, I didn't see why they were bothered but they asked and it is easy enough to go along with.

I'm glad it went ok for you all op.
Don't know why but I expected you to all go to bed together?

Erm, no. That would be weird, although I accept that it is pretty weird already. Both in separate rooms. Me and her husband in the spare room.