Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Support thread for those of us having to 'co-parent' with a narc or very difficult exh thread 4

913 replies

Lilacpink40 · 13/12/2016 21:15

Hi allSmile

OP posts:
Froginapan · 01/02/2017 16:59

Dusters - if you're going to tempt fate in this way may I suggest you also mention something to do with the National Lottery? You never know!!

If you look carefully at that clip you can see even from the side that his face turns from a smile into something rather less pleasant - to be honest I think she's scared of him: she kept right on smiling until she was no longer in his line of sight.

And as for the self-satisfied insane of breath and squaring of his shoulders a moment after he's turn back to front and centre - that made my blood run cold

nicenewdusters · 01/02/2017 19:56

His body language is fascinating. He looks to me like the school bully stalking the playground at break time.

I think you're onto something Frog with the National Lottery - god I hope so. When I was thinking about posting it suddenly occurred to me that it seemed too much of a coincidence. I wondered if you'd all think I was nuts!

Froginapan · 01/02/2017 21:00

The universe is a funny place - full of surprises.

Just give a good hard thought to 'WN Isalnd' (there'a an ITV franchise in there, I swear) if anything comes of it.

😁

PurpleThursday · 01/02/2017 22:29

Hi all, hi frog, I think I might have to shop where you go! Sounds fun!

I am getting into my Mindfulness, half an hours homework a day listening to link and relaxing - not easy to find a quiet half an hour in my life! I did just get a 'mum?' School bag enquiry half way through from DS but pressed on!

Loving the next stage HJM dusters. I'm going to bloody go round there and tell him soon! The suspense is killing me!

Green I find with some things I just need to be alone and work through it myself. It's almost indulgent I feel sometimes but it helps me most, some space to acknowledge and think, then get back in the daily grind. I will be thinking of you anyway Flowers

Nats in some way it's good WN keeps doing these bizarre irrational things in public - more power to your elbow, but goodness it must be so stressful and draining for you. Keep going, we are all behind you.

Not eaten all day so off to indulge in some picked onions...Gin- what's that ? Gin or medicine? Is it new ? Hmm

nicenewdusters · 01/02/2017 23:50

Good to see you're getting the chance to practice Mindfulness Purple . Will be really interested to hear what you make of it.

You have my full permission to go round and knock some sense into HJM. His address is No 1 Procrastination Villas, Open Your Bloody Eyes Street, Fall In Love with Dustersville Grin

The green bottle emoji is gin. I think (hope) it may be in honour of Zombie (Candy) the legendary MNetter who just passed away. I believe gin was one of her tipples. The threads covering her last days have been awe inspiring Gin Flowers

PurpleThursday · 02/02/2017 00:44

Oh gosh I missed that entirely. Where will I find it?

nicenewdusters · 02/02/2017 01:05

Purple If you go to "Other Subjects" in Talk, there's a thread called "Whisky/Whiskey for the Zombie." I believe this is the latest one.

Natsku · 02/02/2017 07:11

Zombie died? Oh :(

Ex skyped DD last night to watch her blow out her candles for her birthday cake (forgot to buy candles so she blew out some tealights instead...) and he didn't even once try to talk about the things he shouldn't be talking about, just chatted to her nicely. It was good and made DD really happy so I'm glad about that, hope he just keeps it up.

Teabay · 02/02/2017 13:08

Hi my friends, just seeking advice! Flowers
I've started a new thread here

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2844279-Child-Maintenance-and-mean-narc-EXh-what-did-you-do-Share-you-advice-please

But you've all had relationships with our island dwelling WNs and normal people's viewpoints may be well off the narc mark 😉

Froginapan · 02/02/2017 18:28

FFS

Ex husband has hacked my email account and changed all the recovery settings.

Does anyone know how to contact Google about this? So far all I've got is a feedback form for the notification I received letting me know of the strange activity...

FeelTheNoise · 02/02/2017 18:37

Teabay I've replied on your thread 😊

FeelTheNoise · 02/02/2017 18:39

OMG Frog how did he manage that? I have no idea how to contact gmail, I found it really hard to get advice from them

Froginapan · 02/02/2017 18:44

I have no idea but he's done it.

Wanker.

Teabay · 02/02/2017 18:49

Oh Frog what a git...
Maybe this is something you can record as harrassment to get him to stay away from you?

Can't help with Google I'm afraid, but have some of these Gin

Natsku · 02/02/2017 18:49

What a bastard!

Teabay · 02/02/2017 18:50

Thanks feel that's really useful x

Froginapan · 02/02/2017 18:53

I've managed to change the security settings to recover things and have changed the password.

Unbelievable.

Natsku · 02/02/2017 19:43

Glad you managed to sort it. What kind of utter prick does that?!

The documentary premiere is tomorrow. Apparently the media will be there and I might have to answer a few questions/have my picture taken so I better get a good night's sleep so I'm not there with massive bags under my eyes. I hope it raises a lot of interest and support for my brother - I think with the whole Trump situation it has definitely got to be a violation of his human rights to extradite him, who knows what Trump will do next!

Ohb0llocks · 02/02/2017 20:00

Oh frog what a bastard! Hope you get it sorted.

Nats I've been thinking about your brother given all this trump business. I've got everything crossed for him.

nicenewdusters · 02/02/2017 21:02

Wow Frog just wow. What a nasty s.h.i.t. he is. Do you have the strength left to report him to the police? That must be a criminal offence. I know they won't do anything but at least it will be on record somewhere.

Nats is that link to the documentary on this thread? I've noticed us both on the Trump threads. Looks like people everywhere are starting to speak out against the Orange Loon. Hopefully somebody with some pulling power will take an interest in your brother's case as a way to expose Trumps disregard of people's rights. Even if they're doing it in a self-interested way if it helps your brother that would be good.

Chrystal1982 · 02/02/2017 21:10

Hi all, sorry not caught up with the thread but just letting you know still no bloody baby! 40+10 today 😒 Going in again tomorrow to be induced (been sent home Monday and Wednesday) so fingers crossed!

greencarbluecar · 02/02/2017 21:15

Oh frog. Glad you've sorted it. What a dick.

All the best for tomorrow Nat, hope you sleep well.

dusters thank you, I might just post on here for a bit of comfort. As long as none of you mind me self-wallowing a bit, especially as it's nothing to do with WN. (And thank you everyone else too, you might all be strangers on the internet but you feel like friends, and sometimes the kindness of strangers can make a huge difference anyway).

Speaking of the Entitled One, he is like a WN extraordinaire right now. It knows no bounds and I think he must really believe his own lies.

You know what, I'm going to go to bed too. Maybe I'll wake up and it'll all have been a bad dream? Or he'll have been deported to WN Island? (I thought ITV show too!).

Night and (((hugs))) to you all.

RedastheRose · 02/02/2017 21:31

frog what a complete and utter twat, clearly just to fuck with you. Glad you managed to get it sorted.

Good luck Chrystal hope it goes smoothly once it starts.

Green I'm sure none of us would mind you having a rant about anything you like.

Hope the premier goes well Nats and good that ex managed to behave himself with DD

All quiet on the WN front at present.

Natsku · 03/02/2017 08:37

Wallow away green we're here for you

Hope the induction goes well Chrystal

I'll link to the documentary once its out on the telly dusters and hopefully it'll work over there.

EmilyRosanne · 03/02/2017 09:48

I hope you are all doing okay. Reading through what some of these men makes me so Angry. The similarities they show are very odd, like they read a handbook of how to make your ex's life miserable.

I looked into passports and don't need his permission to apply, although he could also do the same so won't mention it to him until I have them in my possession as i wouldn't put it past him to apply and hold on to them just so we can't go Angry.

The resident parent can take the DC out of the country for up to 4 weeks without permission, I need to double check but it seems if I just take birth certs it should be fine but may also take some sort of proof that I am the resident parent.

On a completely different note, ex is going out at the weekend (I know as he asked to drop DS off early to 'get ready') and I actually feel sick at the thought of his first night out as a single man. It's really puzzled me because I haven't missed him and know we should be apart but the thought of him out makes me feel really uneasy, especially given his friends are also unattached and quite immature in that sense. It's nothing to do with me anymore but still hurts, and I also get really angry sometimes that he now has this complete freedom minus a few days a week but I am stuck at home with the DC and haven't been able to go out since the baby was born and that look unlikely to change soon. I obviously would rather be with them than not but you know what I mean. Sorry to rant Blush