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Original poster

Ex has called the police on me!

300 replies

Notmyweek · 01/12/2016 21:59

So I've just received a letter from the police stating that my ex has called them due to me harassing him!

They've said they aren't going to arrest me but want to see me to get my side of the story!

Is he fucking serious??!! Only last week I had to call them because of his abuse and weirdness and now he's called them!

Yes I've contacted him since but only regarding our child.....wtaf??

His sister has even been in contact with me! Yet I'm now being told I'm harassing him??

I'm pregnant! I don't need all this stress, how can he do this?? I genuinely believed he loved me once, obviously I was wrong...who calls the police on their pregnant ex??

OP posts:
Original poster
Notmyweek · 01/12/2016 23:57

I think a casual mention that he had taken out an order against you and your ex HUSBAND* would have been met with the same response TBH.

How did your ex wife get swept up in the rancour?*

I'm confused??

I don't have an ex husband.

Well! My ex bf the father of my child contacted her to let them know practically everything they needed to know about our relationship.....ask me why, I've no idea.

That is why I ended up having to call the police because I was getting shut from ex wife, her friend and my ex!

OP posts:
Manumission · 01/12/2016 23:58

So she harassed him?
And he harassed you?
And you've been accused of harassing him too?

Is that right?

Or both of them have harassed you and you've been accused of harassing him?

Are you on good terms with your ex wife now?

Original poster
Notmyweek · 01/12/2016 23:59

I've said that yes me contacting my ex bf is effectively classed as harassment. I've said this in an above post, I'm not disputing that.....I'm simply saying it wasn't abusive or threatening.

And yes my ex wife, I was wrongly accused which I proved & it was all dropped.

OP posts:
Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:01

Manumission

I'm not saying you are mind readers, I did state above that I proved it was all crap.

Yet people are still suggesting it was indeed me.....okay Hmm

OP posts:
NeedsAsockamnesty · 02/12/2016 00:01

Please take legal advice from someone who has a obligation to provide you with decent advice.

If the allagation he has made gets taken seriously then you have fucked up.

You just handed him legal aid on a plate

Manumission · 02/12/2016 00:02

No I know you don't have an exh. I'm just saying it was the casual of an ex spouse that got you that response, I think, not the sex of the spouse.

Well! My ex bf the father of my child contacted her to let them know practically everything they needed to know about our relationship.....ask me why, I've no idea.

He spilled the details of your relationship with him to her?

Or she spilled the detail of your marriage to him?

Fidelia · 02/12/2016 00:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlueFolly · 02/12/2016 00:03

So that's two partners in a row have 'wrongly' accused you of harassment. Once might be bad luck, but either you're harassing people, or you need to take a look at the kind fwho people you fall for, you don't need this kind of drama in your baby's life!

Manumission · 02/12/2016 00:03

You do sound quite hyped-up.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 02/12/2016 00:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:05

*So she harassed him?
And he harassed you?
And you've been accused of harassing him too?

Is that right?

Or both of them have harassed you and you've been accused of harassing him?

Are you on good terms with your ex wife now?*

I feel like I should have just started from the start however it would have taken days to write & days to read!

My ex bf contacted my ex wife....they had a lovely 1 hour chat regarding mine and his relationship, they then continued this on facebook, my ex wife's best friend then decided to get involved too.

It resulted in my ex wife & her best friend sending me abusive messages.

I contacted the police, had a TAU placed on my home as police were worried for my safety.

All of which resulted in myself contacting a domestic violence organisation.....messed up?? Yes!

I've never had a relationship like this before, I think I'm actually put off of ever having one again!

OP posts:
Fidelia · 02/12/2016 00:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OutragedKoala · 02/12/2016 00:08

You're making fûck all sense. You wanted to contact him to make sure he would see his son so if he went to court you could show you made an effort to let them see each other but you also wanted to report something that happened god knows how long ago to the police so if you went to court he wouldn't get to see the child.

Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:08

If the harassment is taken seriously??

The fact he rang them Tuesday, they wrote the letter and posted it Wednesday & don't want to see me until Monday?? Definitely not urgent!

You are telling me you feel sorry for my baby???!! I do too!!

OP posts:
goddessofsmallthings · 02/12/2016 00:09

The penny's dropped, You posted last week as you'd just split up with your latest ex.

You left your dw because you wanted dc and she didn't.

You've had a relatonship of some 8 month's duration with this current ex during which time you became pregnant.

In your post of a week or so ago, you'd been to his home where you were coldshouldered by one or more of his family members and lamented the fact that he was out and about and down the pub with his mates.

For someone who comes from "a respectable family" it's beginning to sound a tad dysfunctional and if you've been invited to attend a police station in relation to this matter, I suggest you take a solicitor as you don't need to be arrested before being given a police harassment warning.

Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:10

Omg, I feel like I have to spell it out one word at a time.

I wanted the courts to be aware of the relationship! What he did

I swear half the people commenting are the kind who shout at a character on a bloody soap!

OP posts:
Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:11

You are aware that a harassment order isn't a criminal record don't you??

You do know it's just a warning don't you??

OP posts:
Manumission · 02/12/2016 00:11

Weirder and weirder Shock

Why does your ex wife care so much about the inner workings of your relationship with your exbf? Jealousy? Is he particularly good at winding people up?

Avoid her too, FGS.

OutragedKoala · 02/12/2016 00:11

You can't want both things!

demonchilde · 02/12/2016 00:13

What I would say OP is - you need to seriously calm yourself down about all this somehow.

The police may well have said they are not looking to arrest you. But if you get as aggressive in your replies to them as you have to some of the queries people have had on here, there's a good chance they will.

You may have a right to be angry, but you need to try and contain that, or else you are going to make yourself appear both confrontational and guilty. Tread carefully.

Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:13

So I can't make the authority aware my ex is violent towards me however try to arrange supervised contact??

As stated above by a previous poster.....the courts will overlook our relationship & what happened & encourage access with our son.

OP posts:
Manumission · 02/12/2016 00:15

If you want to create a contemporaneous record, swear an affidavit setting out all the events and circumstances and lodge it somewhere safe.

OutragedKoala · 02/12/2016 00:15

You need to take a deep breath and be calm for your child's sake. If the father wants to see his child he will take steps, but you can't force it. Sounds like you've tried to trap him into a relationship TBH, stop harassing him before you land yourself in hot water

Original poster
Notmyweek · 02/12/2016 00:16

Fact is, the police won't arrest me.

Worst case scenario is that they will give me a warning and make me sign some document.

I've no intentions of getting het up with them as I can imagine they won't be saying things like "drip...drip...drip" let's be real, they will be professional

OP posts:
Manumission · 02/12/2016 00:17

Or if you're VERY concerned about his likely behaviour around a child, speak to social services.

But calm yourself down first do you can give cool accounts of this to the police and whoever else.