Going on a Bear Hunt - we're going to get through it!

[madamehooch]

As a previous poster on a wonderful thread which has been a real lifeline but which has now ended, this is a new thread for anyone who has been subject to the misery of having an extremely long term relationship (20 plus years ) end. It's a place to find support and congratulations for whatever tiny steps are made and a big non-judgmental hand hold to help us over the inevitable bumps. There will be little LTB on this thread as usually he's already left us (smiling through the pain is always encouraged )😀

Lol , I nearly did forme but I thought was that appropriate for a nanny lol yes I agree he is !! He is still with her though and said yesterday that's all she is there !! How bloody pathetic is that ,he has 2 kids and a new granddaughter that he can be with and they won't be just "there"

Nannys can say what the hell they want

Twat is pretty reserved!

Found this for you forme 😂😂😂

Ha ha love it, thanks Kirk

I had a feeling you would lol , keep strong ladies we deserve better !

How is everyone doing? Hope you've had good weekends and are ready to face the week which is possibly the most pressurised of the year.

I've accepted the fact that this Christmas will be v different to previous years and hope that I have done as much as I possibly can to make it enjoyable for DC. Whether they do or not is another story, they're already complaining that we won't be at home but we will be with my v supportive family so hopefully they will have fun. I'm feeling guilty about making it so different this year but I know I had to, no way could I have done a "normal" Christmas at home, but without STBXH.

Anyway, just a week of work to get through first then the final big "first" for me (have already had birthdays, anniversary and holiday). I am so looking forward to the new year as will really treat it as a new start, even though there's all the divorce shit to go through.

Anyway, I'm rambling. to you all, this time of year is tough x

So much is happening to me at the moment I can't write it all down, ended it with ow for new granddaughter he said , make a couple of small efforts with his kids , she took her clothes from his flat , now they are back together again ! What a joke , good job I didn't tell dd especially with a 3 day old baby he had left her as I knew he would go back to her ! What a weak deluded twat 😡

Christmas !

Just sticking my head in to say hello!

Oh god Kirk, you know what I'm going to say...

Crap that you have to be party to his shameless selfishness but what a great mum you are not to tell your DD. Hope you're enjoying your lovely granddaughter

Morning ladies , loving our banter forme it's making me laugh at least , now listen to this one , she has left him ( for how long who knows ) so he text me clothes gone not feeling too good 😡 So I text back you expect me to have sympathy as if !!! good riddance to evilness , then I told him kids didn't know she had gone , he text back are you joking I have made the biggest mistake of my life ! This guy is deluded , I think of him now as a stupid old narcissistic prick ,btw saw him in Saturday he looks like shit , he was so good looking he is now a wreck , stupid man !!!!!! I did not have one feeling of love or even liked him , I just wanted my kids to have a dad back , anyway I have done my work , a little bit of hassle for them both week for Christmas 🎄 revenge and cold comes to mind ! Clever old nanny Kirk 🙈

Blimey what's going on there Kirk? Do you think it is all over between the 2 of them?

What a complete arse thinking he can come to you for sympathy!

kirk what an idiot. I think feeling sorry for themselves isn't uncommon once they start to see what they have lost.

I am doing ok this week. I had a couple of nights away last week and managed to get through our 15th wedding anniversary without too many tears. I also have my cousins planning a big night out for us after Christmas which will be interesting, not sure if I am looking forwards to it or not at the moment. I want to get out a bit but am worried that having a few drinks will lead to some pathetic emails, although that urge does seem to have passed, for the moment at least.

The new year is nearly here and I am so looking forward to seeing the back of 2016.

2017 will be much better.

I second that Tapir. We've all had a shit year. 2017 will be better for all of us x

Hear hear for all of us, it bloody better be!

Hi all. Only a few more days and then it will all be over.

So DH continues to see his 'friend ' and it has knocked me for six. I'm such a fool.

My virtual best friends , I thank you all for being my support in 2016 , like you all say 2016 has been hard , are we going to let our journey in 2017 be the same , this is our short life are we going to let those narcissistic men who are so selfish and who have not got the same morals that they once had carry on ??? I so hope 2016 brings our rollercoaster to a halt , latest update no contact from him and I haven't contacted him , usual pattern is they make up and he takes her on holiday , what's your bets girls , New York or Barbados lol , more debt in his credit card !! Who cares their relationship is a joke because he had the best woman ever and in 2017 I am going to continue to be that woman 🎄❤️️💪👵🏻

Ahh, lovely message Kirk you go into 2017 with that attitude and you'll be fine. No - or minimal- contact makes things so much easier I find. Who cares where he takes her on holiday, he can't escape his conscience. You're right, this is the only life we will get so let's make the most of it.

Christmas will probably be tough for a lot of us but I'm determined that next year will be better in so many ways

Bless you forme , latest update he text I can't give her up I am not as strong as you are !! Lol , I am so pleased I don't even care anymore he has lost his family because he can't give up his cheap tart ! He kids will be never forget that and he is not a victim he is a coward !

Kirk, he truly is a twat. Texting you to tell you he can't give her up?? Can't you change your number? That is just cruel and you don't need to know. I have flatly refused to know anything about OW from day 1 and stand by that - not for everyone I know - but it's helped me detach.

How's the beautiful baby?

Kirk - he really doesn't have to tell you that he's not as strong as you, that is already blatently clear! He's ranking even higher on the Twattometer.

I hope we can all find some joy in Christmas this year and see the New Year as a positive new start

Twattometer - love it Faff

I Am all ok girls , yes twatish behaviour as usual , baby girl beautiful , stayed away to let them be a family but off to see her today ❤️

Hope everyone is doing ok and coping with festive goings-on.

I was doing really well today, was very productive (not in a xmas prepping kind of way) and enjoying a laugh with DS this evening. Then something happened which upset me (too complicated to explain) and had to go off and sob for a while. Then he (DS) was worried that he had upset me. Really hoping that I can enjoy tomorrow.

I'll be on here tomorrow if anyone wants company to talk/rant/cry/laugh/swear...

Faff , I will be here too , I have had a weepy day too on and off , why oh why ! My ds girlfriend of 1 month dumped him today , his long term gf of 5 yrs left him 4 weeks after his dad left me , 20 months ago this was his first girlfriend since , he has cried all night at 21 ! He said he has bottled so much up since his dad left 😢 Happy Christmas to my Mumsnet friends , keep smiling for all up see even if you just want the day over it's 1 day out of 365 we have to get through x