Online dating...... where have all the good men gone? Thread 110.

[Evilwater]

I know these threads have come in handy for many dipping their toes for the first time into OLD. So here we are again ... another 1000 posts down:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Bumble sounds good! I wish I had known about it I would have tried it. Still will if I need to.
I mean men know the deal so actually might be some on there who prefer women to take the lead

Thanks Forme. I'm thinking of a Brierley introduction to my bestie next - until that's happened, he can't meet anyone else, as she'd never forgive me

Mr Nuclear sounds good.......I just hope you're not putting all your eggs in one basket? From one OI corner member to another x

An interesting read: www.xojane.com/sex/feminist-dating-app-bumble

Been 3 in a row since September. 1st guy met in tinder had quite a few dates then suddenly he just stopped replying then he blocked me. 2nd guy had 2 dates then same & now number 3 last saw him Friday & had another date planned for tonight. Didn't reply to my messages yesterday - previously messaged all day long & now today nothing. If it was just once I'd be ok but 3 in a row?? Is it me? I'm actually gutted, not because I liked him, although i did, more because it makes me feel utterly crap about myself. Time for a break I think

Hue really sorry to hear that, that is appalling behaviour on all their counts and inexcusable. Don't know what to suggest to be honest, but for you

mrsfluff a Brierley introduction? Not heard of that. I fear I may be definitely am putting all my eggs in one basket with Mr Nuclear but I'd kind of already decided that this would be my last first date until the new year anyway so would have hidden/deleted my profile even if things hadn't got off to such a good start.

myuser how fantastic to be rendered incoherent

Forme, not sure what I was trying to type there!! So pleased it's going well for you.

I'm already missing Mr 31. We're going for curry next Saturday and spending night together. Daughter helping her Dad move into his place, so no need to be keep the noise down

Hue, how awful - it certainly says a lot about them!! OLD is bloody horrible at times.

Hmm. Well I've got three bumble matches so far. Far better than tinder. Let's just see if any of them message me in the next 24 hours..

If that's how it works.

It's just so nice to not have to do all the running, for once. Stick up some photos and boom.

Bant I wish you every luck that you haven't matched with someone like me! Messaging first on POF is fine because people tend to have a blurb I can work with, here it's mainly photos.

It's nice to have some mutual matches, it shows that there are some men out there who don't think I'm a big ugly blob, but now I have to use words. Actual words. Let's see if I manage to get anything out before my 24 hours are up...

No don't you have to message them on bumble?

Bant haha I forgot you are our resident fella!! Bumble luck to you

Ah. Apparently if you send a message, he then has 24 hours to respond. So the time pressure doesn't stop until both people have sent a message...

Myusernameismyusername Yes, our one and only non-crazy.

I did not like tinder. I am quite forward actually bumble sounds fun!
Just be brave, nothing to lose!

Wow, it all sounds very pressured on bumble! What if you have work to do? I can't always get time to check the internet everyday...

Lilac do you think you will see him again?
pringle any word back from the one you messaged?
hue that's awful

Good luck to all the bumblers

One of my irons has become obsessed with gaining pictures of my arse since moving to whatsapp. He seemed quite normal before.

Mr Wig (not a toupee- he has a fancy dress on in one of the pics)- I am quite hopeful He seems very nice and genuine. Just moved to whatsapp.
Mr Sailing- is out tonight after helping a mate do some jobs today but sent me a message. Think he is alright too.

I might broach a date with Mr Wig though he has his little girl this week so would be next.

-making my way back to OI corner-

Happy to report that I think I jumped the gun in my previous posts when I said I'd been rejected after sex. We'd had mooseburgers (ha ha, predictive text on my phone now recognises mooseburgers as a word!!) on our second date and we'd agreed on a third date but not made arrangements. When I texted to make arrangements he'd said he was too busy at work that week, which I took as a brush off. However there's been lots of flirty texting since then so I think things are still on track. Relieved, I have to say, as I quite like him.

Myusernameismyusername It's like sending iMessages/using WhatsApp - you can see that the other person is typing.

BaklavaBalaclava You have to send a message in 24 hours. Then he has to send a message in 24 hours. Then the timer is off.

AintThatSomething Yes, had a lovely conversation with one. We could be onto something with this one, fellow Bumblers!

The arse pictures sound disappointing. Not your arse (which I'm sure is lovely) but the sudden change in tone.

I feel bad about ignoring some of my matches but on closer inspection, I can see signs of smoking in some of their last photos and I could not date a smoker again.

Ah. First lesson learned on bumble. Always check the other profile pictures before swiping right, as her first one was misleading.

And now she's messaged me, and I really don't want to respond, as its that 'oh dear I wouldn't have swiped if I'd seen you were heavily tattoed and don't have a job and I can't ever imagine myself fancying you' moment.

So, do I reply politely or just let the clock tick down for 24 hours?

I'd let it tick down

The mature woman in me says it would be polite but then give her false hope... it's your call!
She could be lovely

Bant You can unmatch. If you hit the i symbol next to their name and pic, you get the option of unlatching or blocking.

I unmatched the secret smokers... Less painful than waiting 24 hours, I reckon!

Sending photos of your arse just sounds like you are providing wank material to me. Eww

Not meaning you are! Just that's the objective!

Absolutely. No arse pictures have been exchanged for the wank bank....

Oh god I'm confused. Do I have to send her a picture of my arse?