Online dating...... where have all the good men gone? Thread 110.

[Evilwater]

I know these threads have come in handy for many dipping their toes for the first time into OLD. So here we are again ... another 1000 posts down:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

pissedoff unbelievable! What a twat.

Pisssssedofff Arkkorox Wow. Honestly, you couldn't make up these low life creeps! Stay safe and stay happy. You're both clearly rocking at not getting taken in, which is the main thing.

This is the third one I've come across, 2 Americans claiming to be stuck in war zones. One a doctor. One a marine. Both required airfare from me 😂😂😂
This one I think is a dickhead rather than a conman though, just incredibly thick

Well done for not being sucked in. There are so many chancers out there. I had a message from a Norwegian guy saying he wanted a relationship with a lot of freedom so was looking to fly to the UK for 1 week a month and would like to live with me for that time!

That's unbelievable! What a chancer!

Puts us worrying about going Dutch on a bleeding sandwich into perspective doesn't it

Ooh I had an American in a war zone too! I did wonder with all the overseas messages if there was some sort of scam.

Was he an orthopaedic surgeon ? Honestly he was seriously realistic and never asked for a penny for months. Liked my Instagram photos, text'd, phoned .... Went to great lengths

I deleted the message so didn't find out what job he claimed to have!

Had messages from France Spain and Netherlands today. More scams?

faffalotty haha- probably!

I had a message from a guy in Australia who was looking to move to London mid 2017 and would like to build up rapport with a woman now so that things can progress quickly when he arrives!! And this was on GSM.

sending positive thoughts to pringle

I had one in Spain saying he would like me to come to Barcelona or him to me then another message asking if I could pay for an airfare as a business trip. It all got a bit lost in translation but I think essentially he was after a flight to the UK. Bonkers...

What's app driving me mad.
Online dating for 6/12. First elite singles and now Tinder.
After 5 first dates finally found someone I fancy and we also seem to get on.
After the 4 th date ended up having sex on 3 different days ( last week)
It was a big thing for me as I haven't been with anyone for 2 1/2 years and before that was with my ex for 23 years.
Since Friday he hasn't contacted me and we are supposed to be meeting up on Wednesday.
It's driving me mad and I am becoming addicted to looking at What's App.
I presume now he has had his way that is it. I feel really bad especially as my relationship with my husband was emotionally abusive and he was a serial cheater. How can I have been so stupid.

conway honestly this seems to be the way with online dating, I expect a shag to be s ons and look at it as nothing more and then I'm not disappointed. If I'm happy to go ahead on that basis fine, if not then I don't. It's a minefield. I've joined the tennis club and am talking to everyone at the gym !

I think that's the lesson to be learned about OLD...it should be looked on as a quick fix..if you want a real relationship go out and meet people IRL! Although it doesn't guarantee you won't meet any nutters!!

I know several people who met their spouses through online dating. I'm sure I read somewhere that it's now the most common way for couples to meet? So surely not everyone is just after casual sex?

Sorry to hear what's happened Conway

I honestly think I must be too fussy because my ex has met two women online - nice enough people I'm sure but not attractive and circumstance you wouldn't think many people would take on, I'm keeping my high standards and if that means I'm sad cat lady just fine. I'd rather that than end up with another dickhead

Heartbroken.

Conway I worry about this too. Man I'm dating definitely dropped numbers of messages after DTD. He has still been messaging, but I think may be more relaxed that he knows I'm interested in him. Don't write yours off yet, he could be busy and think that you two are ok so calmed down on texting. Try sending a fun message soon, about thinking about him and remembering fun you had. Still no message by midday tomorrow to include reasons for lack of messages and I'd be annoyed. Then know he was wrong to mess you about and next!

Pringle what's happened?

pissedoff I'm the same as you- for now. Though horniness may make me settle in a couple of months time
pringle oh no, really? What happened?

The short story is because he wanted mooseburgers and I didn't, he called time. We both want long term, but I want to get to know someone then mooseburgers, he wants the other way round. I really, really liked him.

I feel awful. Absolutely awful.

It's just crap when this happens Conway , I've been through the same experience , need to be thick skinned with this OLD , it's his issue not yours .
I'm out of a similar marriage to yours , these men have no idea how hard it is for us , that it takes a lot for us to we give ourselves to them after past experiences , for it to thrown back is quite a hurtful .
Chin up , just think of it as a lucky escape , he's not the one for you X

Pringle if he called time on a delay then in reality he wanted to have his burgers and walk away. Any serious man will wait at least a few more weeks. He's blaming you for his faults.

Sorry it's rubbish