Dh is leaving me - bolt out of the blue

[aleC4]

That's it really. We celebrated 15 years married 2 weeks ago. I thought we had a happy marriage. I still love him the same as I did when we met but apparently he doesn't feel the same anymore. He thinks the works of me as a mate but the spark is gone and he no longer loves me.
We have just come back from a week's holiday and had lots of fun but apparently it was just like friends and he can't pretend anymore.
I feel utterly gutted and am so so sad for my children that they are going to have to go through this. I can't think straight at the moment, I just feel sick.
He wants to tell them tomorrow and move out to his dad's round the corner. It is going to destroy my beautiful children.

I'm so sorry I can't even imagine the emotions you must be going through. Maybe you should talk to someone you can trust or perhaps look at going to counselling so you can vent. big hugs xx

I'm so sorry I can't even imagine the emotions you must be going through. Maybe you should talk to someone you can trust or perhaps look at going to counselling so you can vent. big hugs xx

I hear you.
This was always going to be the worst time in all of this-you have been so brave and done so well. Sometimes things come along to derail it all-in this case Christmas and holidays which are emotional anyway. You are perfectly entitled to wallow if you need to my love.
What have you got planned for tomorrow? Im not far from you if you fancy a cuppa! (I know you of old from the May 07 thread-not a total stalker!!!)

Myfriendnoel now I am intrigued as to who you are? I have name changed since then but must be still recognisable,......

It is I, Scooter...

I remember the name.
Are you the one who sent me KKs?
I thought you were down south?
Message me through here if easier.

Hi, it was me with the kk's I think 😀.Im visiting family for a bit X

I would have loved to meet up but I have a friend coming over - next time for sure!
I've sent you a pm.

Is it just me or do other people have stupidly irrational thoughts about hideous things happening to their children when they are with their dad?
I am ok when they are at his house but when they go out anywhere I always find myself thinking about horrible things happening. Today eh has taken them on a 2.5 hour trip to see his family. The weather is awful. It has been foggy all day and it is cold and icy. This morning I even text him to say take care because the roads are bad. I wasn't really bothered about him but so worried about the kids. Do you think this will subside over time? I feel very protective of my children now, more than I ever did and perhaps it's just me wanting to protect them all the time and be in control.
I keep checking ds iPhone tracker but it hasn't updated for over an hour and this is making me stress! I know it will only be because he is either out of battery of there son signal but I can't help worrying. I have never really been the worrying type but since this all happened I have worried so much more about my kids.

Yes, me. I am constantly slightly on edge when they are not with me. I hate it.its illogical as if anything ex is more risk averse than me, (though an awful driver).just can't shake it.
Mine are gone til Tuesday now

Glad it's not just me Nigel! I was panicking tonight because the weather is so terrible and ds wasn't answering my text. Finally he did but not before I had imagined all manner of terribleness.
I so feel for you having to wait until Tuesday. This is the longest stretch I have done, 4pm Thursday to 10am Saturday and it is long enough. I know their dad would like them for longer but he hasn't asked and it isn't happening at the moment. Dd would not want to do it. It is hard enough to get her to go anyway a lot of the time.
Do you have anything planned for tomorrow night? We are just chilling at home on our own. I am not bothered about staying up to see the new ŷear in. This year has been the shittest of my life and I shall be glad to see the back of it.

Hi aleC4 I just read your thread today and I'm amazed by your strength. You approach every obstacle with such class. It sounds like you have such a great and loving relationship with your kids - they share their feelings with you and obviously feel safe and loved enough to do so with you.

I don't have any advice to offer - there are much more knowledgable posters than I. When I read the thread I was so impressed by your dignity I had to say something. Wishing you a wonderful 2017.

I'm staying in on my own-going to bed at 10-just don't want to mark this year in any way and I don't feel all that optimistic about next year right now tbh... I'm a gloomy cow I know X

Nigel.
It's so hard isn't it? I think we will treat it as a normal Saturday night although ds has asked if he can stay up until midnight!

Sent you a pm nigel

So this is it - 2017!
Bring it on. I think I am going to start a new thread in honour of the new year as this one is nearly full.
A massive thank you to all the brilliant people on here who have helped me through the toughest time of my life.

Let me see if this had worked. New thread here

here