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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Anyone up? DH is leaving me follow up thread. Onit's on it!!

980 replies

onitlikeacarbonnet · 20/07/2016 22:26

Link to my last thread.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2658829-Anyone-up-DH-is-leaving-me?msgid=62446916

OP posts:
onitlikeacarbonnet · 23/11/2016 06:50

He takes up headspace because his behaviour affects me and DC in every aspect of life still.

Up I have friends like that too. The ones who think Trump is a good choice, etc. And, you're right; the argument isn't worth it. They're still friends. I guess it's likely his friends are doing a similar thing. Thanks for the analogy, it's helped. Still difficult to swallow but, people generally want a quiet life so easier to ignore the drama (or live vicariously through it for a wee while). I just hope they realise he set his sights on the wife of a friend and could do the same again. That's the bit that I don't get. He has proven form for cheating with/on his friends. Why would you trust him?
Guess I'll never know.

Im seeing my lawyer today to discuss responses to his lawyers letter (which was a reply to mine).
Then I'm seeing my boss. I've spoken to her in the phone a few weeks ago regarding my return and what I could offer her and what I needed by way of hours, days of work etc. but I had to chase her because it's just over a month till I'm back and I need to know what life is going to look like when I go back. Not least how much I'll be earning, so I can speak to hmrc. I don't want any tax credit surprises.

As for what he's doing/saying to people who used to be friends of mine, I realise it's actually irrelevant. However, it's not irrelevant what he's saying altogether as, in time it's the story he'll tell the DC. That does affect me/us.

I'll be back later for an update on today's proceedings and start thread 3.
Appreciate

OP posts:
ohdearme1958 · 23/11/2016 07:55

Onit you'll get to a stage where you don't give him head space but I think right now is too soon for you because his antics still affect your life - you don't even have the legalities out of the way yet. You're going through a process and one day you will get to where you need to be after such an ugly time of it but sadly that time isn't in the here and now.

Good luck with your lawyer today.

Mix56 · 23/11/2016 08:01

Hi Onit, I hope all went well yesterday.
Have you sorted out what your work will look like, so that you can work out how it work around DCs.?

Mix56 · 23/11/2016 08:01

oh God, "work" 3 times in the same sentence.. I need coffee

onitlikeacarbonnet · 23/11/2016 13:52

Not got time to update now as I've a school thing to get to, but I'll be back later.

Meantime, here's a link to my new thread. Please don't disappear. I still need you all Flowers

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2787862-Onits-still-on-it-Thread-3?watched=1

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