How is he doing it ?

[Purplespy]

My DP likes to know my every move. At first it was in a nice way but now it's ridiculous . We have been together three years and his ex cheated on him so I can understand some of his insecurities .
However ... He has been working away for two days and I always find this is when he is at his worst . He knew my general whereabouts for the couple of days he was away and when he was driving home he was quite cheerful when I spoke to him . I went to work of the evening and he text saying we need to talk . He asked me where I was on the morning if the first day he was away . I had told him I had been at home when i spoke to him on the day but I'd gone to the village shop and dropped a bag of stuff off at the charity shop . I try to keep it simple as to disarm him from the hundreds of questions he asks involved in a simple trip .
So ... He knew I had not been where I said I was but not until he got home
How ??? I've got no phone trackers on my phone etc so I'm bewildered . I think there are cameras in our house . He called me a liar and has not spoke to me for two days . I'm sure it is not the neighbours and he doesn't have any friends round here well enough to be watching me . He won't tell me how he knows but it's happened before that if one thing doesn't add up he's a nightmare .
Any thoughts ?

I bought an AP off Apple this morning which sweeps the room but it's no good at all

I am seriously worried for you. I really think you need to get away from this man. He might not want to let you go, but you need to try while you still can.

Purple I wasn't having a go at you. I'm sorry if it came over that way. I was being too zealous. Only because my ex husband did this to me.

It started out where he just cared where I'd been. Not controlling me oh no, just caring. It ended up where he was paying cash to his mates in the pool team to report to him where I'd been during the day. I was a 21 year old SAHM and he was paying other men to tell him I'd been to the shop, I'd been in town, I had a conversation with the male neighbour. I lied ALL the time because I couldn't cope with the 1000 questions if I admitted I'd met my mum for dinner in a cafe. It isn't nice, it isn't caring, it is NOT love.

Go now. While he isn't at home.

You have nothing joint, you said it yourself, just leave, please.

You do not need to inform him of your movements; enough of the walking on eggshells, this all sounds very sinister. Get out of this mess asap and you can sort your finances out later.
He sounds very dangerous.

FWIW I bet his exes were never unfaithful, those are the excuses people make when they have jealousy issues.

OP, is there anything holding you back from leaving this man? It really does not sound good, nor is it likely to get better. Do you really want to live forever like this?

Do you have find my friends? Does he have an iPhone?

What else do you carry around with you? Any other tablets/devices etc? do you drive a relatively new car? I have a Merc that can tell me where I've been.

Posted too soon. I think most BMWs etc have similar features. And some sat navs could track even if you're not using them?

It doesn't matter HOW he's doing it. The fact is, he is. And you need to leave him before this escalates. It's no way to live.

No I absolutely don't want to live like this I just feel that it's come to a head today . Holding me back had been the nice times we have had and I felt it was a great relationship for the majority and a love I hadn't had or felt before . I suppose part of me keeps wishing for that back . Thanks for all advice . He is at home he's upstairs and hasn't spoken to me since Friday . He's making his own drinks and food and ignoring me .

Car is three years old but I always have keys with me I take my bag upstairs as I've caught him going in it

Purple, please keep coming back here & keep talking. It sounds like you need people around you who can see this situation for what it is, it is so hard to see the wood from the tress sometimes when you're in it - being objective is difficult when emotions are involved (especially if the relationship was once good). Do you have anyone to confide in or talk to IRL?

And why is he ignoring you? You know what you have to do, but I appreciate making that final call to leave is very, very difficult.

Dozy he is ignoring me as my story didn't add up .
Thanks

Purple please DO NOT follow Flacid advice . It will only make things worse. Do all your 'wondering how' once you have left the house.

I agree. Everyone out and then find out what's happening.

I think I'd have a hit squad of parents, siblings, friends, with me while I took everything I wanted from the house and left. Then I'd let a PI into the house and wait for a report back.

Get yourself and your son away from the psychopath before you become a story in the Daily Mail, yet another woman killed by her lunatic "partner"

It happens, leave.

Pathological jealousy is what he has, you need to get out OP. Forget the 3 years of good times you shared, things are not going to get any better.
A part of me wonders if HE has something to hide but that really isn't the issue right now is it?

My exH bugged the home phone (pre mobile) and used to follow me about/check the car mileage etc. fucking freak.

Ironically it was him who couldn't keep it in his pants. They always judge others by their own standards.

The ignoring is a good enough reason to walk out in itself.

So is accusing you of being unfaithful.

Why don't you go out and have some fun while he is sulking. Or go out and arrange your new accommodation. What's your housing situation?