30 day no contact for the broken hearted - starts here

[Thewizardo]

I will be using this as my own personal no contact diary.

read here first

Please feel free to join in the thread if you are attempting to go no contact with someone. If you've just been dumped, left or had your heart broken.

I'm on day 1 today. So far today I've blocked his FB/what's app/Instagram etc. I text him to ask him to leave me alone as he's texting quite a bit. Only emergency texts only about DD.

I'll join the party. Was in a relatively new relationship and he calls me over to his laptop to look at something online and in the past pages tab I spy a swingers site !! I pretended I hadn't seen it in true MN style to get my ducks in order..

You may not agree, but when he went upstairs I clicked it, saw a range of messages, but had to slam shut again. I confronted him, he lied, minimised 'my friend Neil and his wife are on it, they're going through a bad time, I was curious and Neil asked me to look' yeah right!

I once more play cook, 'yes darling, OK, I believe you'...

I went home and set up my own account. To my utter horror he had a couples page on there with another woman!!! I messaged to be absolutely sure there could be no mistaking (although pretty obvious at this point!!) .. He came back immediately, of course. Offering his number for contact....

Wonders never cease! I went NC

He is relying on you feeling guilty in order to pull you back into communication with him.

How you are is no longer any of his business. You aren't refusing to communicate about the children, you have nothing to feel guilty about.

Wow LadyofDunedin! Did he ever contact you with an explanation? Not that there is one of course
I love the link thanks Thewizardo i will keep having a peek when i feel low. I also like the idea of writing down negatives about them when wavering as someone above mentioned. Altho i do then think we are giving them more thought than they deserve.
My worst times are between around 9-11 at night as that was when we used to phone each other. It also doesnt help that i know we should of been seeing each other tomorrow.
Anyway lets all stay positive, each day will be a step away x

Yeah I'm not feeling so positive today. He keeps face timing DD which means I need to hear his voice and then he tries talking to me. I wish he'd just leave me alone

What about asking your daughter to wear headphones, would that be possible at all. I don't know how that face timing works though.

She's only 14 Mths!

That's rotten wizardo, can't he take her out or something?

Lady, that's just crazy.

I feel like my completely reasonable, no shouting, no cheating break up pales in comparison to you all.

He does take her out for a few hours 3 days a week.

Still face times her everyday though!

gemmiebear as it happens I actually got something on my work phone this morning! He clearly was desperate to contact me as I blocked him and it bothered his ego !! he was still vehemently denying it meant anything, he wanted to be committed to me but as I've over reacted we can't be together

The best bit? It said 'don't ever contact me again for any reason' !! Errr, I think he's missing the point as i blocked him!!??

How are you feeling as time goes on gemmie?

Don't ever contact me

I know, you have to laugh! You contacted me, buddy!

Hope that cheered everyone up

I had an awful awful day with an email from him. No further contact but just wanted to cry and have a nice life now. It's horrible that it comes in waves. Grumpy teenager to manage too which just makes evening horrible at the moment. Trying to think of a holiday to get away as just being here depresses me at the moment. I told a friend today I'm clearing out the negative to make way for the positive. Glad you're all on here too.

Hi jenny. Sorry to hear this. Is there anyway you can block his email/ send them to an area that you cannot see? In times gone by I used to plod along great then be brought crashing down by something as simple as an email. May be an idea?

Out of sight, out of mind.

for you

I'm still in the "I want him back" frame of mind. It's horrible.

Have you all read the other pages on that link? The one called 'the pain is real' is so helpful

I feel like shit. Succumbed to some social media stalking. Surprise surprise I don't feel better for it

Yes, I must look in to how to block an email. Thanks for the flowers! I've just rewritten my list of negatives about him yet again.
I have mad moments when I think he'll see the light in the future and come back different but I doubt it. The damage is done.
Much hope for the future for all of us!

I think you can forgive yourself for a social media blip. You'll know next time it just brings more horribleness.

Sounds like we are all having a shitty day of it!!
I too am still in the want him back phase but to be honest I don't even know why I just do!!
Really just want to talk to him feel so lonely now kids are in bed!! Maybe I should just go to bed too!!!!

Well I can now claim one and a half days no contact.... and feeling GOOD for it! Tomorrow he is supposed to have DS but I am not making any contact so hopefully he won't and he can just eff off and leave us alone for a bit

That's how I feel. I'm seeing a Counsellor who said if the person really isn't right it's more that you miss being in contact than the actual person. I'm just focusing on one hour at a time. I think he's actually having a much worse time of it as he has other negative stuff going on and wanted to keep seeing me. He messaged today to say everything about me was lovely but I can't say I think the same about him.

Thank you for this thread. What a great idea!!

Hi everyone!

Looks like we've all had a shitty day

Wish I hadn't checked his Facebook today because it's dragged me back a bit but I haven't text or call him so I'm tentatively claiming my day 4.

He's trying to guilt me into talking to him by saying its best for the kids, why do I want to make things awkward etc. I don't understand how he doesn't get what he's done.

Basically I was already a single mother to 3 DC when I met him. I really held back from a relationship as it's such a commitment to take on. He pushed and pushed for us to be a family and then for a DD of our own. She's 14 mths now and out of the blue two weeks ago he says he's not happy and leaves. He's now out there running around living the life of the single man and he's let a fucking bomb off in my family. His main complaints were that he : wanted to go to the gym whenever he wanted, didn't have any freedom any more and that I had changed since I had DD. Well no shit Sherlock, 4DC is HARD work.

Still can't believe he's walked out on a baby.

Sounds just like mine the thewizardo wants to do what he wants when he wants without any explanation and then have a perfect little family waiting at home when he decides to come back!!

Why do us women have to be the ones with all the responsibility and picking up the pieces!!

I replied to mine earlier and said this is what you wanted you said you had no feelings for me and I should move on with my life and he replied that if I actually believe that I'm fucking crazy!! That was 8 this morn heard nothing since!!!

It's unbelievable isn't it?

What's amazing is that he did go to gym whenever he wanted, had a holiday booked with his mates etc. I don't know why they can't just be honest and say I want to shag other women, be single and this responsibility is all too much. Funny how when men leave they were unhappy but when women leave they've 'abandoned their kids''