He picks my clothes . .

[Eyelashinmyeye]

. .or at least tries to. Would you find this controlling? I quite liked it at first, as it felt like he was really paying attention to what suits me etc, but it has started to annoy me, and has almost caused arguments.

I told him I was looking online for new clothes and he made sure he saw them before I ordered. When I said that I was sending something back because I had seen a nicer one in the shops, he said 'can I see it first'?

Just trying to get an idea if this is controlling, or if you would find it a bit annoying/odd?

Dusters - although the OP is now suspect, I still think your shared experiences were really valuable for the discussion. I have no doubt there have been lurkers on here who might have had an epiphany or recognised something in what you were saying.

Please pm me too. Feel naive

I think the thread should be deleted now if the op is suspect no matter how useful others' comments are.

Call me naive but why would anyone bother to start a thread like this and spend/waste time replying to posts if it wasn't real?

Wow, sad to see it wasn't quite what it seemed.

On the plus side, it has made me start watching Sleeping With the Enemy on Netflix.

I think it should be deleted.

I don't believe troll threads, especially these emotional ones that get people to share their own experiences, should ever be left.

Thank you dusters I won't be doing it again

RomComPhooey - thank you for your kind words x

It just occurred to me that it's ironic people are feeling naive about not spotting the OP was a troll. The gist of the thread was about becoming involved with people who we do not recognise for what they are, i.e harmful to us. These are people who are in close relationships.

Most of us do not attempt to control those we purport to love, we just don't view life and our relationships like that. Similarly we don't expect people to abuse the good will and trust that makes MN possible. I don't think therefore people should feel naive, it just shows you have a healthy regard for others. If we can't spot the ea bastard sharing our bed, how can we be expected to spot the abusive poster on an anonymous forum ?

One of those "why would anyone bother" troll threads, so less obvious than many. Some lovely posters on here giving good advice though, which someone, somewhere will benefit from.

Ha - scary, I've been browsing Netflix for something to watch. Think I'll give Sleeping with the Enemy a go too...

I don't get why anyone would make this up. Also how can we spot a troll and ultimately prove it?

This whole thread has baffled me.

I, too, was keeping updated and worried about the op.

DSis and I can't watch Sleeping with the Enemy because the controlling husband resonates with us - someone unpleasant in our lives who is very controlling & uptight about things. Also, I personally find Julia Roberts irritating in every film she's been in, except for Erin Brockovich.

Could I have a pm too please. I've been around a while and can never spot them

If you aren't married and have no children then get out now while it's easier.
He's too controlling.

Don't think I have ever posted on a thread that turned out to be a troll before. not that I post very often Really didn't see it, and I have read a few threads recently and thought 'not real' and then found out I was right. Just goes to show.

Guys I'm out tonight and Can't PM everybody!

I suppose it could have been real, I suppose trolls sometimes have actual problems in their life?
If not it seems odd to ask for online support with an issue that you don't have. What a strange hobby.
I wont ask poor Elspeth for the markers, she's got her hands full now.

Sorry for making you feel pressured! Enjoy your evening out!

Trolls are harmful but I do think these threads are useful beyond what sometimes turns out to be the false premise on which they start. I have learnt so much by lurking here.

Would someone who already has the PM forward it to me, so Elspeth can enjoy her night out?!

I started to feel twitchy, and that is a first for me in 6 years, so I'd like to see if I'm right!

Can somebody send me the pm please? Thanks.

I've read all the OP's replies and cannot spot anything that would suggest troll, could someone PM me so I know what to look out for so I'm not naive and clueless forever.

Could I please have the PM too? I have always suspected that I am super-gullible, and now I know it's true, because I seriously didn't see that coming!

Sorry to jump on the bandwagon but could I possibly have a forwarded PM too? I took a lot from this thread and genuinely didn't see any 'signs', so would be interested to see what to look out for!

Eyelash and dusters - I wonder if we all had\ have the same partner? 6 months of living together and I left. I confronted him with a list of things that he had problems with me about e.g. the way I washed up, cleaned, turned lightswitches on, walked about around the house, where I put my toothbrush...so many faults! It wasn't normal on his part and it was abusive. I was living on the edge all the time.