i don't know if i can talk about it here?

[panele01]

hello everyone,
i am new here and i don't know,i am not sure if i can talk about it here? i am 20 weeks and 4 days pregnant
,but i am having problems in my life right now,difficulties,complications

(And no need to prove your nationality to Mumsnet!)

chocolatedrops31,ok,As esu Lietuve,nekalbejau tada lietuviskai,nes man kazkaip nesinorejo ir buvo keista rasyti lietuviskai,kai bendrauju su zmonemis angliskai

GarlicBake,thank you But i just spoke my own language i am 1000% Lithuanian,i don't need a visa to live in London,i live here legally seriously,i can work in here and stay in here,i am talking about London

Jis jaučiasi dar labiau keista rašyti lietuviškai jums , nes aš nekalbu ją !

GarlicBake Cool

Panele I get the feeling that sadly it is going to take the arrival of your baby to force you into any action because you will have no choice by then.

Your baby needs you and it relies on you for everything.

I do empathise, I really do with your situation. Your mother sounds similar to mine and I have had depression. I totally understand that feeling of cutting yourself off and feeling immobilised as GarlicBake says.

But soon you are going to be a mum and you are going to HAVE to take action and make decisions.

But it is going to be a million times harder if you wait until you have no choice.

PLEASE get support.

chocolatedrops31,do you believe me now or not? i don't need to take a picture of my passport and post that picture here,do i? I am asking because i don't know if i am allow to post any pictures here.......hmmmmm

Garlic, my last three posts all state panele should go back to the GP if her mental health is bad. I'm not a stranger to mental health issues but there's only so many times numbers and links can be posted usefully.

twosugars,i understand that completely,i am really sorry to hear about your situation Thank you

So this is what I am genuinely confused about - if you understand, why can you not do anything about it?

Like I say, I do understand the depression issue but why are you able to post on this thread as often as you do but not able to call your doctor to arrange appropriate care for your baby?

Agree with twosugars. As I said it's not nationality which is the crux of the issue but the reason why you won't do anything to help your baby ..I thought your nationality might be the issue as I can't figure out another reason

I feel like i am being questioned in a police station Maybe,i am stupid Hmmmmmm

twosugars and chocolatedrops31,do i have to answer your questions?

A few things don't ring true for me here. Firstly any vulnerable pregnant woman who is going through the problems that you, OP, are who has spoken to a doctor would automatically be referred to the social services who would then support and help you to access housing, medical care and benefits. By LAW a doctor would HAVE to refer you, a vulnerable adult.

Also, I find it difficult to believe that you would get to 20 weeks pregnant with only one scan and no other midwife appointments. Vulnerable adults especially are the ones most watched by midwives and doctors, I was in a lot easier situation that what you've described and had to have appointments with a midwife every two weeks.

You say you've been in this country 13 years but still have such a large language barrier?

Also, at 20 weeks pregnant do you have anything for your baby yet? Clothes, cot, pram etc etc? You say you've no money so how will you take care of your baby? You have had am lot of good advice from the good people of mn yet you have just kept going in circles and not acting on it which makes me suspect that you are enjoying the attention.

Asking for help? Feeling undeserving? Fear of unknown? Lots of possible reasons. I'm "no stranger" to most of them myself, on a regular basis.

Break it down, make it easy, Panele :)

Health. Then support.

You can tell your doctor's receptionist, or ring the pregnancy service yourself. Either one. Easy, I promise.

SomewhereInbetween,to answer your question,no,i am surprised myself why my GP hasn't referred me to do scans,to the midwife ect,so what if my GP has lots of patients to deal herself,she cannot do this to me

Agree that a lot of this does not make sense

so call them?

I am 24 weeks and 1 day pregnant now

twosugars,ok,i will do that

Yeah, blame the doc instead of taking responsibility

On this Wednesday,i will be 24 weeks and 2 days pregnant

I am not blaming my GP since its my fault why nothing is happening

i am surprised myself why my GP hasn't referred me to do scans,to the midwife ect,so what if my GP has lots of patients to deal herself,she cannot do this to me

You blamed her there...

Actually a lot of GPs fail to do it. Mine did, then had a go at me because I hadn't had a 12-week scan! I didn't know I supposed to self-refer to a midwife, and wouldn't have known how to. I assumed all that had changed for the better - but just did a quick Google, and it hasn't.

Might be best to call the pregnancy service.