I am new to this and wanted to find somewhere to ask a question anonymously.
I have been married nearly 11 years and have two children aged 7 & 9. My 7 year old is a girl and i am worried about the future for her.
My husband gives me the general impression that he doesn't like me very much. He's not abusive or even nasty and we never argue but he just doesn't talk to me or really have anything to do with me. We live practically separate lives and he knows very little about my life. I ran my own money and he has a well paid job and pays our mortgage and bills etc.
However, he seems to like to have sex with me still. This is something he does generally without my consent, (i say i don't want to but I'm perhaps I'm not forceful enough). This is in no way a love making exercise, it's just him fulfilling his 'need' and using me in order to do this (or at least that's how i feel). I dread going to bed as in not sure if he'll want to do it or not. There is no kissing or touching etc involved. I can't remember the last time we kissed and if we accidentally touch in day to day life it feels really awkward. I'm sure he thinks it's his way of showing me how much he does love me, but i don't feel like that. I struggle to talk to him about it as he flies off the handle very easily and says that on being really horrible to him saying such awful things.
I spoke to my mum a bit about this and she said to me that that's what marriage is like. All women have to put up with that, it's part of what is involved in being married. Why did she not tell me this a long time ago? I feel like i want to tell my daughter that is what will happen to her to allow her to make the decision whether she wants to get married or not. I know she's only 7 but i don't want her to go through this. What should i do? Put her off getting married this early or let her believe the fairytale until she's older?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
MNHQ have commented on this thread
Relationships
should i tell my daughter the truth about marriage?
Lilipops · 14/12/2015 17:10
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.