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any other alternative mums out there?

254 replies

madamez · 11/12/2006 00:41

Having lived a very non-mainstream life, I'm finding it hard to live in Straightworld. Anyone else out there feeling totally bemused once the playgroup chat moves away from weaning & nappies? Or is this just the general alienation everyone feels once DCs start forging their own way forward?

OP posts:
YuletidePaps · 11/12/2006 20:16

Alternative lifestyle - that is what I would define this.

Zzzzzzzzzz

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:26

ah so they are into furry fandom and polymory

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:27

or an excuse for deviant behaviour

DetentionGrrrl · 11/12/2006 20:28

I wouldn't actually describe myself as 'alternative', i'm just me. Other people describe me as it.

I suppose it's because the bands i like aren't on Top of the Pops or Radio 1, and i don't see people from the films i like in Heat.

My dress sense was more 'alternative' (forgive me using the term!) when i was still a teenager. The way things are where i live now, a kid would be more alternative wearing a football shirt and tracksuit bottoms, so many kids have piercings etc now.

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:30

you are a teenager or an old person then

BahHunkBug · 11/12/2006 20:39

Far better to look as though bjs are beneath you but be demon at them, IMO

I mean, who wants to look like they give head, bad or otherwise?

QuadropheniaonIce · 11/12/2006 20:41

so thats another thread killed by some patronising condescending garb then is it? All you who were enjoying yourselves talking tats and piercings carry on, okay so your alternative terminology is a bit strange but we all know what you mean and i don't see why another thread should be stifled because a few want to take the piss. ironic how you all piled in and then everyone stopped postin isn't it?

DetentionGrrrl · 11/12/2006 20:41

I am the elderly age of 24.

And the blow job thing baffled me aswell.

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:42

eeeeuch

have i been posting on a thread with filth on again...

madamez · 11/12/2006 20:43

Well, actually, now you mention it, yes. I was wondering slightly less about what people look like and slightly more about how many mums are into (any combination of) polyamory, folk music, performance art as a career, science fiction conventions, BDSM, veganism, paganism, historical re-enactment, communal living, bisexuality, political activism, competitive sport, naturism... I'm not, I might just add, into all of these things myself.

OP posts:
BahHunkBug · 11/12/2006 20:44

Quad, you really can't see the sniping early on on this thread? Really?

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:45

I did actually ask at 3.30 when the thread was quiet what alternative meant..

strangely piericngs and tattoos were the last thing i thought of

VeniVidiVickiQV · 11/12/2006 20:48

Its only "boden mummies" that folk are allowed to have a pop at, dontcha know....

DetentionGrrrl · 11/12/2006 20:48

i am into some of them madamez...but i shan't say which.

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 11/12/2006 20:49

madamz, most people are interested in at least one of the topics you list - what is it that makes these things "alternative"? I play folk music, have been involved in political activism, met my dh via a mutual interest in sci-fi, eat a great many lentil-based dishes etc - but have no tats or piercings. I've no idea whether that makes me an "alternative mum" or not - I do see the term as divisive though, which is a shame. Perhaps it is an outdated concept now that so many of the things you see as alternative are now more mainstream?

Quadrophenia, I've no idea what your problem is but I think your post was quite strikingly rude.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 11/12/2006 20:51

Well fuck me sideways - I have two "hits" on that list

What are alternative comedians?

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:52

one's who aren't funny

DetentionGrrrl · 11/12/2006 20:53

Bill Hicks maybe? Certainly not Jethro anyway.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 11/12/2006 20:55

Oh, and Quadrophenia, the irony in this was not how the original posters stop posting after they were questioned on some horrific stereotyping, but that some were here bemoaning the fact that they claimed to have been victims of...... stereotyping....

Mind you, I'm seemingly "alternative" and a "boden mummy" so I can speak for both sides

DetentionGrrrl · 11/12/2006 20:56

Now i'm lost- what the hell is a boden mummy?

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 11/12/2006 20:57

I am definitely alternative and franny once said so and i don't ruin the effect by wearing boden either..I am wearing a very old fleece from millets with paint on

persephonesnape · 11/12/2006 20:58

really this thread has just confirmed some of my worst suspicions about peoples attitudes towards the tattooed and pierced. i, personally don't get tattooed or stretch my ears because it gives other people an opportunity to forget their manners and gawp at me.

I started getting extensively tattooed when my ex buggered off because it was a way of controlling my appearance and modifying it in a way that he disapproved of when we were living together. it is one of the few things that i actively do for myself - it may be seen as a way of conforming to an 'alternative lifestyle' but i can categorically state that my tattoos are unique because i designed them myself. I'm not an identikit crusty. my tattoos have personal meanings to me, from times and places to people who have passed.

I certainly don't go out of my way to insult people who conform on the outside to what someone else has decided is attractive in a woman, although personally I don't necessarily like what they may choose to do to their hair, nails, make up etc.

tattoos can be seen as conforming in a way because they can have indigenous meaning - marking a passage into puberty, marking one as a member of a particular tribe - since people could draw they have used symbolism in permanently adorning their bodies - it certainly isn't a new or faddish thing. what is a recent development in the UK at least is the amount of women getting tattooed - some tattooists state around 70% of their clientele are women.

i wouldn't reject someone on the basis of how they look or how they choose to appear to others and I've hopefully taught my children to have the same outlook.

so, for the record

back of neck, my daughters name in hebrew over a pink flower with flames. half back piece of poison ivy (my mums name was ivy and i love comics) two stars at my wrists to represent my two boys. flames, cartoon daisies and thick black tribal on my right forearm. big sunflower on my right bicep ( saw a van gogh exhibition on holiday in chicago - reminds me of my chicagoan friends) purple orchid with ivy for my mum and strawberries ( I'm english living in glasgow, so it reminds me of being english) chameleons and cherubs, plus an anatomically correct black heart on my chest. half left upper arm of two reclining mermaids for my dad (he had one and i wanted to go better) 1/2 lower left forearm based on gregory mcphails 'wicked' ( I'm an avid reader, this is one of my favourite books) nautical star on my right hand - I'm from a naval family. modern art green and purple swirls on my right foot. heart with wings on my right ankle to remind me not to be bitter. tiny wee skull and crossbones of my left ankle, self done.

I've probably missed some!

now, i choose to keep my counsel on most of the following; botux. cosmetic surgery in general, especially breast implants. hair extensions, fake tan. false nails. liposuction. these are arguably painful and intrusive ways in which people 'better' themselves. i see no difference between those procedures and tattooing, other than tattooing was there first.

sorry that was so long. complimentary bazooka joe tattoo transfer for anyone who got that far!

VeniVidiVickiQV · 11/12/2006 20:59

Its a term I've coined to pinpoint the stereotype mentioned further down the thread DG - quotes like "i-live-for-my-kids type mums" etc etc.

BahHunkBug · 11/12/2006 21:00

So if you don't have tattoos, you do have fake tan, false nails and boob implants?

DetentionGrrrl · 11/12/2006 21:01

Good lord that was a massive post!

And i still don't know what a boden mummy is.

All i know is i was having a nice natter with some other Mammys with tats (which i've not seen on here before, so was pleased to join in with) and it's decended into piss taking and sniping.