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Original poster

So I have made myself look like a tit

243 replies

Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 21:56

Dh and I are away for a weekend, he has been to a convention and I've been relaxing, all fab.

Tonight we went to a "party". We were meant to be meeting his friends from this convention etc and sounded fab. We booked tickets and I spent ages getting ready (I very very rarely go out so I was really excited)

The party ended up being a gathering in a pub (all fine so far) except dh doesn't introduce me to anyone and just goes and watches the rugby.

I'm not very good socially and I don't know anyone there, he goes to the downstairs of the pub and for 45 mins I'm sat on the sofas alone because I'm a fucking dick :(

I finally found dh and called a taxi to come back to the hotel and have a blub.

Dh said I knew he was going to watch the rugby (I didn't, when he said it I thought he was joking) now I'm back at the hotel and feel like a tit.

I brought a nice top and did my hair and makeup I was very excited to go with dh, talk to new people etc. now I've ruined it by coming back to the hotel like an idiot, he didn't even ask me to stay when I asked for a cab.

He came back to the hotel a min ago and said sorry etc but I feel awful, I've ruined the evening.

Nothing to say really apart from I need Wine

OP posts:
cozietoesie · 26/09/2015 22:19

I became rather angry reading your OP. You absolutely did not make yourself look like a tit. He made himself look like a jerk. How are things between you normally?

Have a Gin and watch a bad movie on room TV.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:20

rj yeah my other thread, at first tonight, when I asked for him to call a cAb he seemed pissed because I knew this was his weekend etc.

I never would stop him doing something, he's done this whole weekend on his own which is fine. But tonight was supposed to be a party and it wasn't.

OP posts:
Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:22

cozie usually it's fine but after mn advice I'm finding myself looking at our relationship more and more. I love him so much but I guess everyone has their bad points.

OP posts:
Boredofthinkingofnewnames · 26/09/2015 22:23

You are not a tit! You're disappointed - I hope you are drinking wine and / or eating room service:)

cozietoesie · 26/09/2015 22:24

You're owed a good party then. Smile

Error404usernamenotfound · 26/09/2015 22:24

You have not made a tit of yourself at all, OP. Your DH has been a twat. It is incredibly rude and disrespectful to not only not introduce your partner to people at a party where you know they don't know anyone, but then to piss off and watch telly for the duration is awful.

I am also slightly concerned that you don't have your own bank card.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:26

error seriously I have my own bank card, it's just nothing in the account since it's nearly payday.

I would go in his and transfer some money but there's no point because I'm not going back out and I'll just put everything on the room Wine etc

OP posts:
FeckTheMagicDragon · 26/09/2015 22:26

Sorry, but he's been a selfish arse. He knew you had got all dressed up and left you alone with a bunch of strangers to gawk at a rugby match. That's just mean and thoughtless. Make a fuss. It's not being silly. It's about expecting your husband to have some respect and consideration for you.

cozietoesie · 26/09/2015 22:26

Well I think you're going above and beyond by remaining in the hotel room. I'd have stalked out and gone back home. (I really would. Grin)

RJnomaaaaaargh · 26/09/2015 22:27

I can't help but feel he has let you down esme and he's got a lot of making up to do.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:33

I would go home if I wasn't 4 hours away, I just want to go home, I texted asking if he got back ok and he said

Yeah. I miss you though, pretty rubbish without you.
How are you?
Xxx

So I messaged

I am fine, Just have fun and watch the rugby

Passive aggressive I know and he then texted "no kisses?"

I've ignored, I don't want to give him kisses, I want to shout at him.

OP posts:
Starkswillriseagain · 26/09/2015 22:33

He sounds like a cock. He fucked off and left you. Why didn't you get to go down with him? Why did he expect you to amuse yourself with strangers?

Would he like it if you were at a work do and fucked off and left him feeling uncomfortable and knowing no one while you chatted to someone for 45 minutes?

I think you should look at why you think you ruined the evening when he:
Fucked off and left you
Didn't make any effort to introduce you to anyone
Made the weekend all about him not giving a fuck about you
Let you take the blame for everything

I agree with Cozie. I''d have ordered expensive champers, put it and a cab home on the room bill and gone home.

Error404usernamenotfound · 26/09/2015 22:34

whoops, sorry Esme, I now see you mentioned that upthread.

Starkswillriseagain · 26/09/2015 22:35

Yeah. I miss you though, pretty rubbish without you.How are you?Xxx

So he's trying to make you feel sorry for him, like you ruined the evening more? Nice.

He sounds like a Prince, does he often behave so selfishly, manipulative and disrespectful?

Naicecuppatea · 26/09/2015 22:38

Tell him to stick the kisses up his bum. I think his texts say a lot about him - agree he sounds like a dick. I hope this doesn't happen often.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:38

He can be selfish sometimes but I chalk that down to no common sense tbh, he doesn't do it maliciously he just genuinely doesn't realise sometimes, only after I've pointed out etc.

I messaged

I'll see u when you come back later ??

He said I love you xxxxx

What else can I say, I said I was fine and I'm sorry etc and he said sorry too but I really want to "have a go" but it's gone past the point now. I'm upset still so it's best he is back there and not here iyswim.

OP posts:
CatMilkMan · 26/09/2015 22:40

You didn't ruine anything but you might be about to, I feel sorry for your husband.
It started because of crossed wires and dissapointment it wasn't either of your fault but of course everyone is now blaming him.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:40

I messaged

Love you too

No kisses for him!

OP posts:
Naicecuppatea · 26/09/2015 22:40

You have nothing to be sorry for! He should have accompanied you back to the hotel.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:41

cat how can I ruin it? I've not made a fuss with him, he is happy at the pub. I'm talking to fellow mners because I'm alone and they are the only ones giving me a shoulder.

OP posts:
Starkswillriseagain · 26/09/2015 22:42

He can be selfish sometimes but I chalk that down to no common sense tbh, he doesn't do it maliciously he just genuinely doesn't realise sometimes, only after I've pointed out etc.

How many times does he get to do it before it comes more then thoughtless?

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:43

It's been going on for the duration of us together so who knows when the penny will drop and he stops.

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnish · 26/09/2015 22:44

He can be selfish sometimes but I chalk that down to no common sense tbh, he doesn't do it maliciously he just genuinely doesn't realise sometimes, only after I've pointed out etc

Actually he sounds a selfish pig, nothing to do with a lack of common sense.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 26/09/2015 22:44

naice he did come back to the hotel, he said sorry and I said to go back.

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnish · 26/09/2015 22:45

The penny isn't going to drop. He's not stupid, he just isn't bothered.

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