I would like to add to what I said about "your life with this man"
SoThat made me think about it what is happening to my aunt.
Her husband, my uncle, is a lying cheating abusive arsehole. He left a couple of times but came back. She never chucked him out and has just acknowledged (but not celebrated) 50 years of marriage to him.
He is now in his dotage and he is more likely to piss himself than get laid with one of the young ladies he always managed to pull before. Does that mean that he has now settled into old age with my aunt? Does that mean that he has finally come to appreciate all that she sacrificed? Does that mean that he now, finally, loves her?
No.
She has always "made an effort" in an attempt to keep him at home with her, kept herself slim and pretty, even now in her 70's. Kept house and the kids whilst working full time. The whole 1950's nine yards. I dont judge her for that, when he first left her, 40 years ago, a young divorced woman with 2 children would have been judged even more than she is now, marriage to an asshole was better than being a single mother. So she did her best to keep her marriage together. But it didnt matter what effort she made, he was a player.
So now he is old, impotent and couldnt pull a rotten tooth out of a dead horses head and HE BLAMES HER.
Of course in reality we know that he hates her, he hates all women but moreover, he hates himself. Hates himself for being sad selfish inadequate. But being the "man" he is, it couldnt possibly be his fault so he falls back on his old whipping boy for all the wrongs in his life, his loyal, loving wife. And oh yes, he did tell them how terrible his marriage was, how unhappy he was, and still stayed for 50 years, because pricks like him always need the next fuck lined up before they leave. You are that "next fuck" ladies. Not because you were special, but because you were the only fucking idiots desperate enough to have them. You are a commodity, thats all. A Thing.
I hope that you do stay with your "prizes" ladies, I really hope you do. Because that means that you will suffer the life my poor aunt is living when your dream men suddenly cant pull anymore and have no choice but to stay with you, and that will be the ultimate fucking karma. YOu wanted him? Well you got him. Good luck with that.
I just wish that one of the many OW my uncle had, had been just as stupid as you are, and taken him on for good. Then my beautiful aunt would not be stuck with the cunt until he draws his last breath, something I would cheerfully help him with if I was given half a chance.