DRY 8!!!!!!

[CheesyNachos]

Hello! This is our 8th! thread for those who are abstaining from alcohol and for those who want to abstain. :) We love newbies and lurkers. We have people who have been DRY for years, for months, for weeks, days, and hours. :) ALL are welcome. We have heaps of tips and we offer support at any stage.

DRY 7 the previous thread is here...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2347295-DRY-7?

That's great Last re your 5k time!!

I didn't really do anything; I felt a bit weird in a way - had that little critical voice skittering away with "well if you were normal you wouldn't need to stop drinking" thoughts. Pushed them aside though - am getting better at the not beating myself up stuff!

We're in Wales (Cardigan Bay) at a beautiful cottage, with a friend and her daughter. Friend is under pressure at work and having to work while we're here. She is very much a "normie" but it was interesting talking to her about her need to wind down with a couple of glasses of wine or comfort food, after she finally got her daughter to bed at 9 last night, exhausted. She said it felt like the only joy in her life when she was really stressed. I know that feeling, but can now see it as an illusion...

I'm here to subscribe to this thread.

I used to drink almost every night, usually a bottle of wine. I cut right down when I joined Slimming World last summer and didn't miss it at all. I limited myself to drinking on a Saturday night only. Now that I've reached my target weight I've relaxed a bit and I usually have a drink on a Friday night as well now. As a result I'm tired/irritable all weekend and dont feel like doing anything other than sitting around on the sofa. And I don't feel good about myself. Need to get a grip of myself, I can feel myself slipping back into bad habits.

Hey nebulae.
I feel like the next step is to actually be teetotal rather than an occasional drinker. A bit like I am a proper vegetarian rather than someone who doesn't eat meat.

That's interesting Teapot
Maybe my mindset has changed to drinkers being abnormal and non drinkers being normal . I think Proff Nutt and Alan Carr have said the same.
Its our society that normalises drinking alcohol as being "fun and harmless" when in fact it causes far more deaths, illness and accidents than Heroin.
Yes its legal to drink alcohol but I feel "normal" without it now.
I don't wake up feeling ill,no anxiety,my house is clean I do so many other things like actually read all the books I buy
"Its an illusion ... " Yes.

Ps I don't go around telling people who drink they are abnormal- no certainly not !

Thanks Noeuf. I don't know whether being long term teetotal is for me but at the moment I think I need to remind myself that I don't need wine, even at the weekend. It's becoming a habit again. I think I need to have a few dry weeks at least.

I think Im like younebulae
I just found that despite stopping many times, if I drink at all I find it hard to control.

I could always find an excuse, good or bad to open the wine.
Its the nature of the beast ( wine that is)its addictive.

I feel much happier now Ive stopped and my life has changed so much.
Whats interesting is that since I stopped I discovered everyone I know who drinks alcohol is drinking most days ,ranging from one glass to one bottle or more.

I really want to stop.

Party girl in my teens and twenties. A baby in my 30's. I just despise how awful I feel after drinking now. Puffy, sick, tired. So tired. Then I eat loads of crap the next day when I'm hungover. I don't drink as often as I used to, but I tend to binge drink once every 2 weeks, may be with one night in between I have 2 glasses of wine. I need to stop because looking after my toddler is the most important thing to me, and I'm a lot more impatient when I'm hungover which is terrible.

So here goes... I want to go sober.

Welcome to all the new faces from me! :) Moved - yay! Now the unpacking begins - boo! Last congrats on your 5k PB - I'd say that's a big deal as a fellow runner Hope you enjoyed Pride - god I miss that city ...... Teapot Cardigan Bay - beautiful and the home of Howies one of my fav online clothes creators! Day 680 for me yesterday and yes the move did trigger the desire to drink, as a new first, and it was a shandy I was missing. So we went to our new local pub for dinner and I had a Becks Blue shandy Back to unpacking I go!

Cardigan Bay is beautiful Teapot. Stayed there some years ago for a family wedding, hope you're enjoying it. Yes, I get thoughts like that but I try to think of it now as biological. A predisposition is likely in your DNA and you wouldn't beat yourself up for developing a food allergy or genetic illness.

Glad you're all moved and sorted now Lucy :) Was the same when I moved, little urge for a drink but it's now lovely having a fresh start in a new house I've never been drunk in. Good luck for unpacking.

Welcome nebulae and DirtyDancing. I was horrendously impatient with the dc when hungover. Our days are now much calmer and I can deal with their temper tantrums without wanting to throw one myself.

Still riding high here. Feel so bloody happy atm, I'm a bit worried I'm going to come down to earth with a bump. Had a great chat with my friend who was really supportive about something I've been stressing about. Now got the warm fuzzies about how lovely people can be. Dunno, feels like everything is clicking into place. I'm finally starting to like and respect myself. Being gentler with people who I've probably judged far too critically of in my head in the past and starting afresh. This better not be some weird pink cloud thing again

Hello

"Still riding high here" That's brilliant Last I feel the same.

On the 4th July I posted here for the first time and so Im celebrating my first AF month today.
Its weird it feels like much longer, because so many things have changed in that time, Ive changed and life feels so good!

Hope you are all ok

Good luck and the best everyone

Can I join? I know abstinence is the only way for me but the thought of it terrifies me. If I don't do this, I'm going to lose my daughter. She's told me this is my last chance.

Hi Andy

What terrifies you about stopping ?
I thought I couldn't cope without alcohol but actually all the symptoms of anxiety I had were down to the alcohol .
It might not be the same for you- are you drinking enough to worry about withdrawal ?
Can you identify what made you start drinking? Depression and anxiety are sometimes the cause.
I didn't have physical withdrawal at all but if you are at risk or you think you have depression/anxiety you really should see your GP as its dangerous to withdraw suddenly. GP can also help you treat depression/anxiety and be a source of support.

I feel like a ton of weight has been lifted from my shoulders and the sheer sense of wellness Im feeling ( as opposed to feeling tired, grumpy, headachey and just under par) is fantastic.

Good luck ,you have taken the first step

I think this may be what they call TPS pink

Hiya Andy. Do you want to talk more about it, if you want? Abstinence can feel overwhelming and scary, your body and emotions are so reliant on alcohol. Such a cliche but the best way is really to forget about the future and take it a moment/day at a time, for me anyway. Does depend on how much you are drinking whether you can stop cold turkey or not as pink says. Hope you stick around :)

TPS ???
Sorry am tired I cant work it out

Hello all .
Haven't been on the thread for a while, but wanted to check in.
Massive congrats to Teapot. A year feels really meaty, doesn't it?
Hi to everyone new and special welcome to AndyW. I promise you - stopping is a lot less scary than continuing to drink - which as we all know takes us to a pretty wretched place. Sounds like you are really up against it so need to act quickly. Lots of non-judgemental hand-holding on offer here. I have been sober 3.5 years now and can't believe how much my life has changed in that time. I feel like a different person. It's like I've got my life back. Apart from all the obvious physical benefits (which are HUGE), I feel less obsessed with myself and my ego. I think alcohol dependency can make life so small and narrow - I was always either recovering from a hangover, resolving not to drink for a day or so (and failing, of course), or planning to drink/drinking/trying to hide evidence of my drinking. Didn't leave much time for thinking about other things or other people. You can do it. Life isn't dull without it - it's a bloody relief!

Pink TSP = twatty sober polyanna
Andy recognise your moniker from the Dry Jan and June thread where I was lurking and sometimes commenting. Welcome and fear not it's perfectly doable as we are all testament too :) And as Merse said Last said just focus on today and you'll start to stack up days and feel better. Honestly, sobriety delivers everything alcohol promised otherwise we wouldn't be here

Ok Im not sure whether I understand why Im a "twatty sober pollyanna"

Im really happy with how Im doing so I will give the thread a miss for a while .

Oh no PinkPopPony it's a term of endearment conjured up over on the Dry January thread earlier this year for those moments of unbridled joy at being sober. No offense intended and please return

Oh no don't go pink, I didn't mean to offend you. I was talking about myself more than anything as I'm so full of the joys atm! It's a piss take, not serious lovey.

No no no!! Honestly, we all get the pink cloud feeling and it's just a term conjured up in a jokey way to describe it. Not meant in pejorative way at all. I rather miss my TSP phase!!!

Pink Clouds...

Oh crap Im an idiot !

Sorry I completely misunderstood .
Never heard of "pink clouds", although I always wondered what "dry drunk" meant.
Ironically Im feeling tired and quite tearful tonight.
AF isn't the only change Ive made but today one of the changes became apparent and real( its a good positive change) but Im feeling wobbly about it (not about being AF).
I think I need a few days to adjust and Ill be ok.

Hope a sleep sorted you out Pink . I think we all go through waves of feeling obscenely positive about being AF. It's great to be able to talk about it in places like this because I find people in RL (other drinkers basically) don't really want to hear about it.

It all feels a bit odd dealing with our feelings in response to changes in our life, whether good or bad - because you're dealing with the feelings without any anaesthetic to numb them out.

I was out with my friend at a restaurant in the sunshine here on hols yesterday, by a river, all glorious. She said "don't tell me you wouldn't like to be sat here drinking local cider this evening..?". They don't get it. "Well in a way, yes of course I would" I said... "But I don't want what comes with it." And for me that would be waking that little monster, the itch that would make me anxious for the next one more than she would be. And who wants hangovers and fuggy-headedness? Not me. Day 378 today.

Welcome to the thread AWH. How are you today?