DRY 8!!!!!!

[CheesyNachos]

Hello! This is our 8th! thread for those who are abstaining from alcohol and for those who want to abstain. :) We love newbies and lurkers. We have people who have been DRY for years, for months, for weeks, days, and hours. :) ALL are welcome. We have heaps of tips and we offer support at any stage.

DRY 7 the previous thread is here...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2347295-DRY-7?

Good advice from you there Sea. You're all doing so well. It was my experience and I've read it loads from others that it takes a few weeks for sleep etc to normalise. We like to think that the hangover from drinking takes just one day to recover from, but it was a real shock to me (someone who didn't drink daily and would have maybe 1-2 blow outs a week) that my body actually needed weeks to recover once I stopped. But oh the loveliness that sober sleep is, and it never gets stale.

As the saying goes... "I'm so glad I decided to drink last night". Said no one. Ever.

Thank you Teapot. I love that I no longer wake with the fear.

It is eerily quiet here tonight. I hope everyone is ok.

waves I'm here :)

Still here. Not been 100% dry. End of September did for me slightly but am keen to get back on track. Have running plans for weekend which require total abstinance

Waves back to glad and Holly.
I just thought it was strange as usually it is quite busy on here on a Friday.

Enjoy the running Holly.

Hi everyone.

I have been lurking, but not able to get on to post. Nightmare weekend so far. I am on Day 5, which is good, but DP seems to be drinking more and more and it's putting a big strain on things. Yesterday I managed to scrape my car against another one - I left a note on their windscreen - and he proceeded to get very pissed and then tell me what a crap driver I am, and that when he learns to drive he will do it "properly". What an arse. I only passed at the start of September, I am a nervous driver, and he can't drive at all! We got an Indian takeaway, which I usually love, but I couldn't enjoy it because him being so drunk was just upsetting and horrible. He slept all night on the settee after passing out about 9pm.

So teapot, I think you were right about drinking causing dischord in our relationship. My mum doesn't drink, and I could never understand how she could stand my dad when he went on a binge.

Have to dash Bam, will be back later but wanted to say it might be a nightmare weekend but WTF - YOU ARE ON DAY 5! That is just fantastic, please please please focus on that just for now.

Keep going, keep going, keep going... you're through the initial worst bit...

I'm here too sea :) Reading Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach which is I'm finding a real page turner so was busy doing that last night!
BamBam you are doing brilliantly!! Day 5 is awesome Agree with Teapot focus on the positives lovely

Well done BamBam. Have you thought about going to AA? That extra support might be really helpful with you trying to stay sober, especially with a problem drinker in the house.

Will have a look at that book Lucy.

Took DS to cinema this morn, then for pizza. I loved it. We are doing so much more, now that I am not too tired and hungover on a weekend.

Just popping in to say hi. Keep going Bambam. You are doing great.
I'm still dry!! Love it - so much more energy now.

Way-hey BamBam well done you!! You're doing brilliant. Go Hadron too.

Also spent last night reading but nothing as spiritual and life affirming. Stephen King's The Stand That book looks really interesting though Lucy. Today was meant to be a proactive one but instead I pottered about and feel like I haven't done much at all.

It's great isn't it Sea. I really feel like I've reconnected a lot with my dc and I can handle the days they push my patience without flying off the handle.

I'm really enjoying my kids too. I have so much more patience!

I did NOT have patience with my DTs today (aged 5). One of them is in a phase of resolute sleep-denial - she refuses to go to sleep till gone 9pm but just lies in bed silently until screaming MUMMYYYYYYY!!! two hours after I've switched the lights off. This means she is incredibly tired and grumpy all....the....time. It's very very wearing; she's exhausted. Tonight I had them in bed at 6.15pm listening to an audiobook, had removed ALL extraneous toys/night lights etc - this includes a pillow pet she uses silently as a nighttime laser show - caught her doing this a few nights ago when I walked in to her room to see her waving it around to create "interesting patterns" and wondering why when she's doing that for hours on end, sitting bolt upright, that she can't actually fall asleep ARRGGHHH. I also found a mini pen torch secreted under her pillow (also confiscated) which I suspect she was using to create similar secret laser disco effects.... Anyway - tonight they were fast asleep by 7pm - a miracle. I'm so relieved!

All of the above, of course, is much easier to deal with sober than in that edgy, "can you just go to fricking sleep so I can relax with my wine" way that life had before, especially at the weekend.

Everyone's doing brilliantly. I'm feeling like a bank of seething emotions at the moment, very on edge with the divorce etc. Just trying to get through the days.

Teapot

Teapot and and

Teapot had not twigged you had DTS ... wow ! respect , seriously as I have a dear friend who had DTS and I do know how much work they are.

Our water has gone off ...had to do an emergency run to buy water until it is fixed ... so glad I was sober so could go!

Hope your water is back glad.

I don't feel well today . Woke up a few times with drenching cold sweats. My head hurts and I feel cold. DH said he hopes I am not going to be lying on the sofa all day .

Morning all !
Sorry have not been around much.
RL dramaz and all that going on- feel I have finally made head way in dealing with someone* who has lots of problems including using alcohol to supress their feelings .
Came to a head this week when I called them on their nasty behaviour and it all came out. Lots of talking and finally I think they get it.
Keep going everyone - approaching day 100 for me next weekend !

*Someone very close but not DH

Hi all - I hope it's OK to join in here, as I'm really feeling like I need to stop for good. (On MN since 2010 but NC'ed for this.) I've always been a binge drinker rather than a daily drinker - there have been periods where DH and I would drink a beer or two at home every night, but mostly I can go for up to 3 or 4 months where all we'll do is perhaps have a pint in the pub at the weekend or a couple of drinks on a Friday night in front of the telly.

But then I'll be out with friends and it'll be like the reins have been removed, and I'll just be drinking until I black out - this happened on Friday, and I don't remember getting home at all, I just remember acting like a total twat and I've spent the weekend in pyjamas recovering. A few years ago, pre-DD, I'd be doing this a couple of times a week, but I just don't want to be doing this at all. I used to be self-destructive when I was drunk, and even just the stupid shit I say and do when drunk makes me despair of ever sorting myself out. I don't want DD growing up seeing me regularly so incapable. But I've tried a few times to quit - nearly 100 days last year - but then just yearn to be 'normal' and go back to joining in with everyone else.

Sorry, this is a bloody essay, but I wondered if anyone can advise how best to deal with binge drinking rather than regular daily drinking?

Have a hug Dash and yes we can support you :) Some of us have gone dry for many days(me particularly) but yes then lapse (me :( ) and get back to the drink :( But we can stop :) Join us and get some support :)

water back on :) thank you severn trent!

Hello Dashis. I know that binge drink feeling. And the horrible weekend after feeling. I'm not much good at advising what to do as I seem to have transformed from that to someone who just did low level drinking all the time. I'm sure there are others with better advice.

Since end of Sept I have been drinking again but not too much but am feeling that it could all slide. Did however manage my running after a night out on Sat when only had one drink even though we went out with friends.

The main problem is that DH is back drinking again so there is wine in the house which I am useless at resisting. Think once the week starts I will be able to get a few days under my belt and have some running planned to keep me on the straight and narrow.

My run today went v well - I've got my first proper race in 2 months time and want to do myself proud.

Hi Dash.Welcome. You sound very much like me. I can totally relate to what you have said.

PS. DH isn't really a B. I was just fed up that I am expected to carry on when unwell.

Wine is my weaknesses too Holly.

Hello,
I've been lurking here for a long time.
I've become increasingly worried about my drinking and I want to stop - for health reasons mainly.
My husband works away a lot and I've found myself drinking by myself a lot just out of sheer boredom and loneliness.
My relationship with alcohol has always been problematic - drinking until I was sick, passing out, being drinker than everyone else, obsessing over my next drink (all the classic stuff I've read on here).
I don't drink every day, 3 times a week maybe but often alone and often a lot of booze.
Because I'm doing it alone I'm not sure I will have the willpower to stop.

What can I do?