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Original poster

confused over work

236 replies

FishingRod · 29/06/2015 20:17

Hi, Im getting really confused feelings about a woman at work and do not know what to do. I am a married man, with children, I do not see much of my wife due to work commitments and her working shifts. Lately a new woman joined our company and I have taken a real liking to her, she is pretty, we connect so easy, she makes me laugh and is completely on my level, her sense of humour, her personality, I just find her so easy to get on with and have never come across a woman like this ever. Sometimes we can chat in the office for ages and we can get really really close when we are looking at something say on her screen, she flirts alot and i flirt back and can talk sometimes flirting dropping sexual references. I just feel so much chemistry, like I have never felt before. and I believe she does too. Sometimes we touch accidentally and that electric feeling runs through me, and i believe she feels it. But she mentions her boyfriend quite regularly which I just ignore, but that really confuses me because of the relationship we seem to have developed. I also think if anything did happen she would blame me because of the frequency she mentions her boyfriend. I think she knows she cannot cross the line and she knows I am married and that makes it difficult for me because I dont want to rock the relationship with my wife, so I have to resist crossing the line. Maybe she mentions her boyfriend because she knows I like her. I would love to tell the woman at work how i feel, but would that ruin the working relationship, we have to work close together? we do have deep conversations and sometimes I get really sexual thoughts towards her. I would love to find out what she thinks without asking her, so we can be open more if she feels the same. One of my friends said i will have a fling and then i will know where my feelings are but that is high risk. So confused as i feel i pay so much more attention to the woman at work. Should I offer to take her out for a drink and see how we feel? so its outside of work.
Regards and please reply with thoughts.
C1

OP posts:
ineedabodytransplant · 02/07/2015 16:11

Sorry posted too soon.

She talks about her boyfriend to warn.you.off. Probably because you spend all day drooling over her. Not an attractive sight.

Leave her alone, enjoy your partnership with your right hand and either leave your wife or appreciate her.

Idiot.

pocketsaviour · 02/07/2015 16:32

Lois, you are last 562% more talented than E.L. James, and torture the English language far less.

I look forward to your forthcoming masterwork 50 Shades of Sexual Harassment Grin

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 17:00

That might be the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me Grin.

FayKorgasm · 02/07/2015 17:16

The more I say bulge the stranger it sounds.

I have never checked out a mans bulge.

FayKorgasm · 02/07/2015 17:19

As she refilled the paper tray her eyes wandered and came to rest on his impressive love spuds straining to be released from the pinstripe fabric.

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 17:21

love spuds Grin

FrancesNiadova · 02/07/2015 18:29

Ewwww, I'm doing sausage & mash for tea. don't think I can eat it now!

Senada · 02/07/2015 18:53

love spuds. Grin

Up there with the sex oranges.

MN at it's best.

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 19:02

In a moment of crazy he had confessed all to her, laying bare his heart and other organs.

"This must be love," he said to her in strangled tones, in the stationery cupboard, "because I think of your wibbling globes all the time and we can talk about everything and you are so cool and you have nice shiny hair and my wife doesn't understand me have any idea what is going on".

To his eternal surprise, she smiled and told him that she felt the same. That his bulge was the last thing she thought about at night, and the first thing she thought about in the morning. But there was something she had to confess. What, he thought, what could be so serious? Nothing could dent the passionate dirigible that was his love.

"I'm mid transition and still actually have a penis. Is that going to be a problem?"

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 19:05

Damn can't edit. The wife has no idea bit was supposed to be struck through!

FayKorgasm · 02/07/2015 19:40

He shook his head and looked her in the eyes,cupping her bulge in his manly hands. He felt his dick twitch with excitement,the thought of her meaty manliness and shiny hair all over his flabby middle aged overhang made him almost horny.

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 19:48

This book is so going to be called ALMOST HORNY.

Anniegetyourgun · 02/07/2015 19:52

Saw a cartoon in a newspaper once with an elderly Lothario saying tragically to a pneumatic young woman in a restaurant, "My wife understands me!"

Also saw a film years ago called Guide for the Married Man, with Walter Matthau (for whom I had unaccountably a bit of a Thing). Man loves wife but is attracted to sexy neighbour, who is sending out interested signals. Man's friend assures him adultery is no problem as long as the wife doesn't find out. Friend, a serial adulterer, is clearly expert at techniques for not being found out and has a raft of Awful Warning stories about men who were just a tiny bit careless. At film's end Our Hero has followed all the advice, booked a motel with sexy neighbour and is about to undress, but suddenly hears a commotion from the chalet next door where his expert friend has just been discovered in bed with A Woman by his wife and a dozen paparazzi. Not surprisingly, this dampens his ardour completely. A product of its era, but amusing nonetheless.

Oh, and women flirting with their bosses to get better reports is such a bloody tired old cliché.

Anniegetyourgun · 02/07/2015 19:54

haha. I'm good for a couple of paragraphs.

So was E.L.James, but unfortunately she went and wrote three whole ruddy novels.

Original poster
FishingRod · 02/07/2015 19:56

I appreciate comments that are real on here to me, if someone sends me sarcastic comments, im going to ignore. Especially women that verbally gang bully.
For those people with sensible comments, i have taken on board. At work nothing has changed, i still fancy her and had a intimate moment in the office printing room. Am proud of myself I resisted, as she got very close and was sexily dressed. Im not stupid, i know what she wants and none of it is my fault.

OP posts:
LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 19:57

FOUR! We now have "What I did in the hardware shop" by Christian Grey, aged 27 and three quarters.

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 20:02

i still fancy her and had a intimate moment in the office printing room.

Life imitated art! I wrote about this a little while ago.

Am proud of myself I resisted, as she got very close and was sexily dressed. Im not stupid, i know what she wants and none of it is my fault.

Really? So you haven't encouraged it at all? Thought about taking it further at all? Thought about cheating on your hard-working unsuspecting wife at all?

If this woman genuine is after your bulge (sorry just vommed a bit) don't be alone with her. Ever. Because I see it going one of two ways. You have a dalliance and then end it and she complains of sexual harrassment. Or you turn her down instead and she complains of sexual harrassment.

Anniegetyourgun · 02/07/2015 20:09

Four? OMG. Is there no end?

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 20:11

Apparently not. The next book will be told from the point of view of the Saturday girl at the hardware store, and her mum.

Original poster
FishingRod · 02/07/2015 20:19

Also i wanted to add, she is very honest and has told me personally she is not the type to sleep around, she is not that type of girl. Maybe nothing will happen then or maybe something will, i do have witnesses in the office of how she is with me, maybe sometimes im as bad, but i cant help that

OP posts:
LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 20:25

OH FOR FUCK SAKE. I would not normally say this but man the fuck up! All this "it's not my fault" and "I can't help that". Do you know what - you can. You aren't being rushed along in a tumultuous fantasy of minge and bulge that cannot be stopped and oh god it's not MY FAULT.

If anything happens, it will be as much your fault and responsibility as hers. Just think how your wife is going to feel. When inevitably she finds out your sordid, sordid little story.

thatsshallot · 02/07/2015 20:30

WSS ^

LoisPuddingLane · 02/07/2015 20:37

Also, if you've been following the story, you'll know that she has a penis.

MagicalHamSandwich · 02/07/2015 20:39

What Lois said, except:

Actually it'd be your fault more than hers because she's a junior and you're a manager. Which means you're supposed to know better than her and lead by example.

How do I know this? Well, I've managed juniors before, including some very attractive ones. Apart from the fact that you're being an abysmal husband you're also in the running for this year's crappiest boss award!

Jesus, I wish you worked for me! I'd have you in a disciplinary before you can say 'bulge'!

Original poster
FishingRod · 02/07/2015 20:41

I know this is very common what I am going through as anyone can see 46.1% of men have had an affair in the office:
www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/03/office-affairs_n_2213942.html

OP posts: