confused over work

[FishingRod]

Hi, Im getting really confused feelings about a woman at work and do not know what to do. I am a married man, with children, I do not see much of my wife due to work commitments and her working shifts. Lately a new woman joined our company and I have taken a real liking to her, she is pretty, we connect so easy, she makes me laugh and is completely on my level, her sense of humour, her personality, I just find her so easy to get on with and have never come across a woman like this ever. Sometimes we can chat in the office for ages and we can get really really close when we are looking at something say on her screen, she flirts alot and i flirt back and can talk sometimes flirting dropping sexual references. I just feel so much chemistry, like I have never felt before. and I believe she does too. Sometimes we touch accidentally and that electric feeling runs through me, and i believe she feels it. But she mentions her boyfriend quite regularly which I just ignore, but that really confuses me because of the relationship we seem to have developed. I also think if anything did happen she would blame me because of the frequency she mentions her boyfriend. I think she knows she cannot cross the line and she knows I am married and that makes it difficult for me because I dont want to rock the relationship with my wife, so I have to resist crossing the line. Maybe she mentions her boyfriend because she knows I like her. I would love to tell the woman at work how i feel, but would that ruin the working relationship, we have to work close together? we do have deep conversations and sometimes I get really sexual thoughts towards her. I would love to find out what she thinks without asking her, so we can be open more if she feels the same. One of my friends said i will have a fling and then i will know where my feelings are but that is high risk. So confused as i feel i pay so much more attention to the woman at work. Should I offer to take her out for a drink and see how we feel? so its outside of work.
Regards and please reply with thoughts.
C1

So what - a boyfriend is just a boyfriend. Plenty of relationships overlap. If they aren't married and don't have children, there are a lot of people who would regard that as transient anyway.

She isn't important here.

YOU are married. You have A WIFE AND CHILDREN. She can sleep with you if she wants to. She didn't make any promises of monogamy to your wife. She owes nothing to your children. But you do.

You sleep with her and you are very likely opening a can of worms. That may come back to bite you on the arse in all kinds of ways - at work, gossip, wife finding out, children finding out, distraught mistress hurt by your coldness to her etc etc.

I've been that woman and I've seen it. And I know that strong sexual attraction is something that you really have to mentally engage with to fight. It's much easier to say "to hell with it, let's have hot sex with the foxy young woman. fuck her and fuck my wife. I don't care if I hurt either of them as I'm all that matters here."

I strongly suspect you will do it anyway. Have fun and good luck with the fallout.

I meant work-wise senior.

That having been said: might you be having a mid-life crisis? That would account for some of the teen style drama ...

Do your wife a favour and let her go. Your self interest is disgusting.

molyholy

I think you are right. That plus the username FishingRod.

It's utter bullshit.

understand. Do you think i should confront her or not?

What an idiot!!! Your wife deserves better.

You are her manager? Definitely harrassment

You are her manager and she is talking to you like that after a month????

FFS, you really need to get a grip!. As flattering as it all sounds to you and you are here questioning why she is behaving like that towards you, I am telling you now, she is trouble with a capital T, she doesn't even know how to behave appropriately with her boss.
You need to nip this in the bud right now.
You will end up either:
Coming on to her, she will either go for it, or have you for haressment.
You will be disgraced or even lose you job.
It will all end very badly for you.
Even if you do fancy her, which is normal, don't go there, you will stand to lose a lot more than her. Don't make a fool of yourself ( and your wife) its not worth it.

Your friend clearly picked a woman who knows how to keep her mouth shut, but the truth always wills out and I suspect he won't be anywhere near as happy with his wife when she finds out.

I somehow doubt that lil ol' Ms Almost horny Chatty will keep schtum if you shag her and then decide it's your dw you really want.

Have you decided how to react when Ms AH C's boyfriend turns up at your place of work or when you find your other workmates desperately trying to hide their sniggers when they look at you?

How are you going to explain yourself when you go home expecting to have a quiet evening in, only to find that your dw has been fully appraised of your adultery in graphic detail?

I have never experienced anything like this and did not expect it. Maybe if i run along with it, it will die out ?

I am her manager

It gets better... add you having lost your job due to shagging one of your subordinates and times it by your dw.

goddess, thanks for your comments most make sense.
my friend cheated about 4 years ago, nothing will crop up now. The fling woman is not on the scene. Also I wasnt going to say this but at work she keeps looking at my bulge. I cant comment to her about that, she is free to look

can someone tell me what DW means, i thought it ment Dont Worry ?

< yawn >

Is that where you keep your wallet?

If he exists, your friend is living on borrowed time and you're wasting our time.

It means your wife. Remember her?

You are her manager. That's all that needs saying here.

Either get over your crush or get used to the idea of getting over losing your job.

And FFS, of course she makes more of an effort with you than with the other men there. After one month on the job she's presumably still in her probationary period!

Everything seemed fine with my wife until a month ago. A month is not a long time, sometimes its instant attraction.

It means your wife. Remember her?

Unlikely. She's out running with unicorns.

What i need to know, what do i try to do at work? unless your male its hard to understand sexual needs. That does not mean i will, because i have gone a month and nothing has progressed

ok tell me what to do tomorrow? when i arrive at work? its not easy at all.
She will have a low cut top on i know, especially how warm it is

Is this girl likely to tell my wife? when she does not know her?

unless your male its hard to understand sexual needs ba ha ha ha ha. 1/10

This is a 15 year old taking the piss, surely?

Really

self loathing