HOBBIT’S BAR – still finding it hard to move on…part 9

[bobs123]

Welcome to Hobbit’s Bar, owned by Hobbit, open to all and run by anyone who wants the job!

This is the place to come if your marriage/relationship has come to an end and you are struggling to come to terms with this. It is a place to vent, ask for advice, relate to others in the same situation, take a break and have a laugh, whatever.

There are people in this bar at all stages of separation – just separated, negotiating, mediation, court, divorced - and all reasons for this, whether it is abuse, general breakdown, financial worries, OW/OM involved, or coming to terms with a new life.

It is a place to come to for support. You are never obliged to give support to others or reply to any posts. It is ALWAYS okay to say SHIT THIS IS HARD and interrupt the giggles if you are having a tough time. No apology necessary. No one will have a go at you for what you are feeling and share on here. Divorce is a rollercoaster, we are all at different stages, so feel free to jump right in.

Some glossary terms:

1. Jess is our mascot. Owned by Hobbit, she might do requests if there are enough sausages in it for her.
2. Izzitinis are a revolting cocktail created by Izzie that only she drinks!
3. No 6’s are what we are/were married to, after Hobbit’s Twunts list. Some of us also have “pet” nicknames for our exes
4. KOKO – keep on keeping on (used a lot on here along with SHIT THIS IS HARD)
5. Ignore any exclamation marks posted by Izzie or Roz that might make their comments sounds a bit…dodgy. Something to do with their iPads having a mind of their own!
6. We all listen to WWK aka WellWhoKnew aka Mother who keeps us under control.

Our theme tune is

My name is bobs, 55, married 22 years, 2 DDs 21 & 18 who have NC with their Dad. Nisi granted last April on the basis of 2 year separation while living in the same house. Tried solicitors for over a year to sort out the financials, then mediation for 5 months which didn’t work as due to his PA nature he is all but supine and unable to contribute. Sold our family home over a year ago and have been living in rental as he had the house proceeds frozen. He has now been given a choice of accepting my proposal or going to arbitration or court.

Link to last thread, which has links to all the previous threads here

bobs love the MILF

iwas did he not snore? I certainly don't miss Concorde in the bedroom coupled with the herd of snuffling pigs.

Hi everyone :)

I'm sat here right now with a massive smile on my face, looking at my two girls out in the garden chatting away and smiling at each other. I cannot even begin to say how glad I am that I am here and not stuck back there anymore with Mr Misery guts.

My garden has yielded lots of lovely surprises so far, we currently have a vase full of beautiful cerise gladioli I have a lovely neighbour and she is slowly teaching me some gardening tips, I have a new found passion.

Another day off tomorrow, life is just sweet right now. I love it.

KOKO all

Hey Hobbit I'll trade my MILF status for your joint bank account

I will raise that. The joint account for the Tesco rifle and some animal hats for my cunning disguise. I will pay for your plastic surgery from the life insurance payout

Oh yeah, forgot. I've name changed. Guess who this is

Love the new name Izzie

me how lovely to hear someone contented with their life at last.

Hey Izzmeister loved the "Izbobs is not only in the land of Meh, she's also in the land of Yeah!" Go you!!! Also like the snuffly pigs!

iwas no need to be sorry - lucky escape. He was twice my weight. Last time we DTD (alcohol-fuelled) I offered to be sick on him and then fell asleep Obvs not memorable except for that

hmmmm...6 moths....yeah...never said I could type. You should see some of my post's before I check them - gobbledygook. Retaliation's a bitch

According nice moment

Iz you're on fire tonight!!!!! Can giggle out loud atm as DD upstairs with boyfriend

1 when I was deciding whether to end my marriage or not I just thought about the cheating and the lying mainly and how that impacted on me. I also kept thinking about all the horrible changes to my life that would happen if we split up. I didn't really think about all of the other positives that I've discovered. It takes a long while to adjust and get used to it but from what you've said when you've adjusted I think you'll end up being much happier.

bobs I like snuffly pigs. I just don't like snuffly pigs that look like twunts in pyjamas and who share my bed

Iz its because I have had zero fuckwittery from him recently. I love it, what more do I need to know now..if I was ever wavering or reconsidering before I'm not now.

snuffly pigs?? You mean the frigging herd of buffalo???

( Look what happens when you go out for the day - all this carry on !)

Add to the above the nose picking and gouging , scratching of the arse when talking to you , the feet picking, farting in bed - but enough of the good stuff!

Good for you me

bobs NC in your honour as new proprietor of t'Bar

According said it...Serious note to all...it is when there is NO contact (from him, solicitors etc) that we are at our happiest. This is how it should be

Of course alcohol helps. I have had one cider and am anybody's - just a shame there's isn't an anybody around Oh well, supper with DD and boyfriend while watching BGT from last night will do almost as well

Hi Hobbit and Hobbitettes you are all making me laugh through a difficult weekend. More tears about my house and poor frazzled family members trying to talk sense into me. They all think I'd be better with a fresh start.

Ditto to most of Iwas' list. With just me and a teenager in the house who is very reluctant to change his clothes but also a tidy teenager I really have very little to do apart from sit around and be a lazy cah. I used to spend hours tidying up after the twunt and I didn't even realise it at the time. Bed all to myself with no one pestering me for sex that's the best thing.

Cheers Ixbobs I like running a bar

wise farting in bed, farting out of bed, farting anywhere.......

Whoopsy Izbobs

Aw now this pig and her litter can come to live with me

Snuffles

Oh fucking hell, remember this?? In bed, in the chair. I could have murdered him.

No thank YOU

drifted do you do any of these things? Or is it a jacuzzi rather than a hot tub??

Thank you bobs and Im not on my second large glass of wine ;)

home and iwas

I wish I had been pestered for sex, I never was. He even used to create a little wall between us with the duvet cover when he went to bed so there was zero skin to skin contact at all.

I've just done something else that I wouldn't have done if Sid had been here...I've had my dinner on a laptray

Izzie Sid and I were discussing getting the bathroom done last year and I said I'd like one of those Jacuzzi baths and the response I got was it was a waste of money but "it would be good to have sex in it" Everything came back to money or sex with him, how I didn't work him out sooner I will never know. And we didn't get the bathroom done.