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Dh said I'm fat

244 replies

runlikeagirl · 02/04/2015 22:12

I suggested some chocolate (might have suggested cracking open and Easter egg). He said no and then added "you can't keep complaining of being fat and then eat chocolate. You'll always be fat if you carry on like that"

I pulled a Hmm face. He carried on "well, am I supposed to pretend you haven't put on weight, you have"

I have put on a little weight as I've been injured and not running and there is possibly some issues with my thyroid. I'm 5lbs over my upper bmi weight, 5'6" and a size 14.

Im really hurt, be he seems to think he is only stating fact.

OP posts:
flippinada · 03/04/2015 22:47

That sounds rough run and unfortunately not unfamiliar (child of now retired teachers over here).

Hope you can relax and enjoy your holidays over Easter.

runlikeagirl · 03/04/2015 22:55

There are toilets and a fridge. But the are a long way from my classroom.

OP posts:
Marzipanface · 03/04/2015 23:04

My daughter's paediatrician and dietician have both recommend my daughter 'grazes' throughout the day to maintain blood sugar as she has a condition which means she finds it hard to keep it stable. a piece of food every2-3 hours in fact so Talkin is incorrect.

HelenaDove · 04/04/2015 00:28

Ah I see Run And you cant leave the classroom unattended. I still remember the classroom portacabins in the 80s.....miles away from the loos.

bonniebear · 04/04/2015 06:38

I have seen people say the busier the are the more they eat. Surely if you are genuinely busy you will eat less as you don't think about it as you are occupied.

Vivacia · 04/04/2015 07:18

I think bonnie that once you get the chance to eat, you feast and eat too many calories. Or if you're an emotional eater you choose high fat, high sugar food and eat too many calories. People with jobs like these aren't overweight because they're too busy too eat.

bonniebear · 04/04/2015 07:20

I have a job like that. I couldn't imagine having time to put on weight, as you are constantly on the go moving about

Vivacia · 04/04/2015 07:25

They are constantly on the go! They don't have an opportunity to eat, drink or use the toilet! Get to 5 or 5:30 having not eaten all day and you're not satisfied by a chickpea salad.

Vivacia · 04/04/2015 07:26

My posts just now aren't written very well at all.

bonniebear · 04/04/2015 07:28

You don't have to have a chickpea salad. I just go home and eat normally

Lloydgeorge · 04/04/2015 07:31

Get onto the Thyroid UK website. My understanding is if you're thyroid is borderline Underactive it's not going to go away. Try and get your exact levels from the GP and post on the forum, they're not Doctors but have a huge amount of combined experience on their illness and can guide you what to ask your Doctor and how 'borderline' your results actually are. Good luck

keepsmiling2015 · 04/04/2015 07:55

If you are always going on about being fat then, in context I get his point. Do you say it a lot? He could be at the point where he's fed up of hearing it and then you doing nothing about it.

It is tactless, but it sounds like he is staying fact, which is obviously hard to take.

BifsWif · 04/04/2015 08:06

So, you are telling him that you're fat and you are 5lb over the maximum healthy BMI weight, yet when he agrees with you and tells you so he's being a bastard?

Insensitive? Maybe. Honest? Probably.

runlikeagirl · 04/04/2015 08:39

Right. Just to be clear. I do not "go on" about my weight. I have mentioned once that I have put on weight and I feel fat. Once. A few weeks ago.

I

The doctor would only repeat the blood test in 3 months, which is now two weeks away. It is complicated by the fact that there are thyroid issues in my family, but lithium is also known to inhibit your thyroid function. So even with the results it is likely to be a discussion between psychiatrists and g
GP as to how to manage it.

Helena- I'd much rather not be assaulted than have a fridge close! The issue is that I don't have much time to eat, but I become ravenously hungry so grab whatever is easy, it usually healthy.

OP posts:
flippinada · 04/04/2015 08:57

run please don't feel the need to justify yourself on here. You haven't done anything wrong.

jesy · 04/04/2015 09:11

Op

Size 14 is fine average in fact I'm a12 to 16 depending on shop , I'm sure in better weather we eat better.

I think the skipping meals ect is hard , I used to work in community and would eat in my car I didn't like the group lunch thing that they had going on so ended up living on sausage butty so put on bit weight xxx

pinkfrocks · 04/04/2015 09:13

run you have my sympathy re, work but you really do need to be a bit more you focused over the working day.
It's very bad not to have a wee for all those hours. On the one hand you will get dehydrated- even though you don't feel it- and this will affect your energy and mental performance. You also need to keep your kidneys flushed out- every 2-3 hours is the recommendation. If you aren't drinking enough then you will feel crap.

I don't know how practical this is but if your school has such poor facilities then I'd be looking to change jobs because being able to work in those conditions in not on ( and I used to be a teacher too.)

GraysAnalogy · 04/04/2015 10:15

Can we just stop with this average is fine business.

Size 14 is 'fine' in an individual basis, not blanket. Average doesn't not equate to fine.

pinkfrocks · 04/04/2015 10:23

If I was a 14 I'd be morbidly obese. It might be 'average' but that doesn't make it right.

merrymouse · 04/04/2015 10:29

Leaving everything about food and weight loss aside, I think you need to find an exercise that you can do regularly while you recover - yoga? pilates? walking? (not sure how this would affect your injury) so that you feel more 'you'. (I would say swimming but see that you don't like swimming).

I think that scoffing packets of biscuits in the house when somebody is dieting is mean, and won't be doing your DH any good, however easily he appears to burn off the calories.

ohtheholidays · 04/04/2015 10:30

You are not fat and your husband is being an arse.

Way to go mate upset the women(your likely to want sex with at some point)and make her feel worse about her body.I know that would get me in the mood Hmm

Mentioned the sex because I should imagine that happens at some point in your relationship.Grin

I was a size 6 when my husband met me,recently I was a size 18.I'm loosing weight now,but I'm doing it for me.I put on the weight because I've become disabled and have to spend most of my time in a wheelchair now.

But not once did my husband call me fat,no matter how much I said I was.He always told me of for saying it about myself.He's been nothing but supportive and he's always treated me the same no matter what size I am or how much I've weighed.

He never comments on what I eat or how much I weigh,but every time I loose weight he's really pleased for me and really celebrates any loss I've had.

That's the kind of support that will help you loose weight.Having a go at someone or putting them down in general does not help someone loose weight if anything it helps them come of the diet and gain weight.

WorraLiberty · 04/04/2015 10:38

For anyone without access to a fridge at work, cooler lunch boxes are brilliant. They have freezable gel packs that you just pop in the freezer overnight.

Keeps food and drink cool all day long.

ohtheholidays · 04/04/2015 10:44

Just saw your post about the kettle and microwave,is there room and plug sockets available for more than one of each?

If there is I'd send round an email to all members of staff,you could all stick in £1 each and get another 2 microwaves and another 2 kettles for the staff room for £100 ie £1 donation each.I know you shouldn't have to pay for it yourselves but for £1 each I think it would be worth it.

Is there room for a fridge as well?

You need to find a solution to the stress your experiencing at work as well,long term that's not going to help your health.Is it a mainstream school?

runlikeagirl · 04/04/2015 11:15

We've tried. We've been asking for a year for a hot water tank thing. They need pat testing and the people only come in once every few years.

Pink, I've been teaching 10years and I used to have a lunch break etc. The last 3 years it has got worse and worse. Finding a new job is virtually impossible because I'm part time, and there are no part time jobs advertised. There were 5 in the whole country for my subject last month.

I work at lunch so that I get to see my own kids for a bit and get to go to bed before midnight.

I do need a solution. But while I have a mortgage to pay there isn't an easy answer.

OP posts:
pinkfrocks · 04/04/2015 11:24

Are you not in a situation where you could have a kettle , or a mini fridge in your classroom and lock it away in a cupboard? I've worked through lunch hours many a time but it didn't stop me taking a salad packed in a plastic box ( as someone else said you can get cooler types) and taking a flask with me.