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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

My friend ran over to ask me this morning why there was a pretty young lady in our car with my fella!

207 replies

Trio · 27/09/2006 16:59

Im willing to accept that maybe im being a bit daft about this, BUT, i called and asked dp and he said yes, she is called Rachel, she started work there a few weeks ago and he has been picking her and giving her a lift ever since! We only have one car and up until a few weeks ago (funnily enough) i had the car most of the time as he got a lift of a friend, but suddenly he decided he needs the car all the time - hmm i wonder why that is! AND she only lives round the corner from us - why has he failed to tell me all of this? and only told me grudgingley when i asked him about it? My friend said she looked really young and pretty! im trying not to be silly about it but i have to wonder why he hasnt said anything at all about her!

OP posts:
risingsun · 29/09/2006 17:28

Ttio,I don't think it's you with the problem at all,I would feel exactly the same in your position.
It seems even more suspicious now you mention the e mailing of other women.

How old are you children?

noddyholder · 29/09/2006 17:29

Trio you arew getting on a bit and got a bit excited giving a lift to a young dolly and didn't tell your wife because you wanted to live out the fantasy that you are still the office romeo but you got rumbled

FioFio · 29/09/2006 17:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

risingsun · 29/09/2006 17:29

Sorry,should say trio

SSSandy · 29/09/2006 18:31

Trio, take it you and Mr Trio live together since you share a car. I find it bizarre that he comes on here to discuss it rather than with you. Maybe you two are really very open but I'd find it strange posting about dh on here, then him coming and reading what I'd written and responding online.

Maybe I'm too old

SSSandy · 29/09/2006 18:36

sorry just re-read that and it sounds so rude. I didn't mean to be critical but I honestly find it a bit unusual.

trinityrhino · 29/09/2006 18:43

terribly sorry but i feel i need to tell you so i can stop thinking about it

everytime I see this thread title I read it as " My friend ran over me this morning........"

I keep thinking goodness not much of a friend if she ran you over

sorry not read the thread or even the end of the title
I shall step away now

wannaBe1974 · 30/09/2006 10:05

I am partly with SSSandy here - having said that I know of a couple who used to go onto an internet chat/game site and would be on separate computers in the house and would be talking to one another over the internet despite the fact they were sitting in the same room as each other so it does happen. Firstly i would say that there are obviously serious communication issues in your relationship if your dp feels that he can't tell you he's giving a colleague a lift to/from work, and also if he feels the need to tell personal things to people by email that he wouldn't be able to tell you. That being said, some people find it difficult to communicate verbally and for some people it is easier to write things down which might explain the email conversations to a degree, it doesn't make it right, but it does explain why they might have happened.

Secondly, if it's "only the internet", then why would mr trio feel the need to come on here and put his point across? If it was "only the internet" when he was emailing, the surely this is "only the internet" as well so it doesn't matter that trio has written this all down on a website, after all it's only the internet so is irelevant surely?

I think that if this is for real then you need to seek some professional couples counselling and evaluate whether your relationship is worth fighting for, but tbh there seem to be a lot of inconsistencies in these posts and I'm beginning to have my doubts.

Original poster
Trio · 01/10/2006 13:10

Ok dp is laughing heartily and saying we all need to get a life (git) and has apparently told some of his colleagues and they think im just insecure so now im in the 'grey area' i cant tell if it is me or not, i have read most of the posts and i cant help but agree and feel i am in the right to feel a bit mad and kept in the dark! wannabe1974 - Thankyou! lol i like your comparison with it 'only being the internet' EXACTLY my point! it appears there is one rule for him and another for me here, and yes we do live together, our kids are 6, 3.5, and 1, i have to say although i dont go around thinking im gorgeous, im only 27 and i dont think im about to fall into the 'mingers club' just yet i hope! Maybe i should just leave all this and forget about it - but then of course i end up with those thoughts occasionally - "what else dont i know about"...........

OP posts:
CreepyCrawlyCarmenere · 01/10/2006 13:14

I think it was Hub2dee who said, he fancied her, hasn't done anything, but has got caught out thinking about it by lying by admission. Basically Mr Trio got caught out being a plonker.

turquoise · 01/10/2006 13:27

I don't know really follow all of this, have skimmed the thread: but if he's telling his colleagues about this in such a way as to make you appear foolish or clingy, then that does not strike me as a particularly sensitive or supportive partner, whatever his opinion of the rights or wrongs of the actual lift situation.

What he did (or omitted to tell you) has clearly made you feel uncomfortable and insecure, and I would have thought that would make most decent men feel the need to reassure you and make it up to you, not laugh about it with his mates. Rings a bit of best form of defence being attack to me.

Original poster
Trio · 01/10/2006 13:39

This site is like chinese whispers.. you're all really sad sorry lol

OP posts:
Original poster
Trio · 01/10/2006 13:46

oh and instead of being on here - go out with your familes and stopp bloody moaning ...

OP posts:
mellowma · 01/10/2006 13:59

Message withdrawn

angelinaj · 01/10/2006 20:16

Men are usless when it comes to a pretty face and given the opp they would!! why are we kidding ourselves they wouldn't because they promise and lie and wiggle out of it. Uh yeah!

hub2dee · 02/10/2006 18:24

You've been caught lieing to your wife re: pyt and we're supposed to be the 'sad' ones ?

LOL LOL

pmsl.

Piffle · 02/10/2006 18:26

defensive husband telling us to go out with our families?
Touche poppet, touche

lulunaticmama · 02/10/2006 18:35

partner comes on here to fight his corner, she reads his comments afterwards..

then tells everyone kind enough to offer some words of comfort to basically get a life....and we're sad!

nice....

risingsun · 02/10/2006 18:51

How are things trio?

Have you been banned from mumsnet now?

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 02/10/2006 18:54

He soooo wants to shag her.

TrickorTrio · 03/10/2006 15:18

sorry to keep reviving this thread, but i'd just like to say that i didnt post those last threads, dp got on here and decided to have a last moan! sorry i appreciated all your help with my crazy problem!

Rocklover · 03/10/2006 15:58

I have been following this thread and thought it was amusing at first, but now it is just plain ridiculous. Forget the girl and the lift and whether or not Mr Trio wants to get his leg over, that is not really the issue any more.

The issue is Mr Trio, you are being a childish and irritating git, and if I were mrs Trio you would be out on your arse by now. Are you that shallow and pathetic that you freely discuss your domestic squabbles with your work mates? I am sure you think they are having a laugh at Mrs Trio's expense, but what they are probably doing is thinking what a total berk you are.

Then just to prove that you should be up for the arsewipe of the year award you come on here, slagging people off and telling them to spend more time with their families...maybe you should heed your own advice!

Sorry to be harsh Mrs Trio, I really think you need to shut this thread down and talk to Mr Trio in private and sort this matter out by yourselves!

NannyStar · 04/10/2006 13:20

"im only 27 and i dont think im about to fall into the 'mingers club' just yet i hope!"

You said you were 30 before and the girl is 20. Do you live under a bridge trio?

lulunaticmama · 04/10/2006 13:21

esp..partner posting....

NannyStar · 04/10/2006 13:22

it's weird...don't all be so naive m'netters!

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