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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

My friend ran over to ask me this morning why there was a pretty young lady in our car with my fella!

207 replies

Trio · 27/09/2006 16:59

Im willing to accept that maybe im being a bit daft about this, BUT, i called and asked dp and he said yes, she is called Rachel, she started work there a few weeks ago and he has been picking her and giving her a lift ever since! We only have one car and up until a few weeks ago (funnily enough) i had the car most of the time as he got a lift of a friend, but suddenly he decided he needs the car all the time - hmm i wonder why that is! AND she only lives round the corner from us - why has he failed to tell me all of this? and only told me grudgingley when i asked him about it? My friend said she looked really young and pretty! im trying not to be silly about it but i have to wonder why he hasnt said anything at all about her!

OP posts:
risingsun · 28/09/2006 18:05

Well said fattiemumma,you put it so much better than me.

hub2dee · 28/09/2006 18:06

Did you just forget to tell the mrs then, Mr. Trio ? Or did you feel it was so innocent / inconsequential that it wasn't necessary IYSWIM ?

risingsun · 28/09/2006 18:08

Also mr Trio why did you suddenly need the use of the car back when you were getting a lift from someone else?

Original poster
Trio · 28/09/2006 18:12

Because I don't as a rule... Here's how it is.. Two weeks ago my friend and collegue (a man) left the company to go onto other things. He was also "my lift". This worked great as DP needed the car as often as she can, what with 3 kids. So, when he left we, funnily enough, hired another person. I'm a graphic designer so these people can be males and females. She so happens to live close by, so another friend at work offered to give us both a lift whenever he could as he's the camera guy at our place and is out and about some days. So, low and behold he called one night and said can you pick so and so up. And yes, I did neglect to tell DP on the night as it slipped my mind... its only a lift to work you know... so low and behold here we are... I apologise and accept that the male species are all bast*rds.. I mean what else can we be??? You have us all sussed!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Trio · 28/09/2006 18:13

Oh and she knows im using her username - I TOLD HER :-)

OP posts:
TheBlonde · 28/09/2006 18:14

So Mr Trio why did you only tell Mrs Trio "grudgingley" when asked about it???

NotABraBurningOtter · 28/09/2006 18:16
Hmm
fattiemumma · 28/09/2006 18:17

stop being so male!

your wife is upset by this. whether you feel its a big deal or not isnt the point.

dont sit here explaining to us...im quite sure there's not a single person on this thread who (really) cares a damn whether you give this woman a life or a free ride on your lap!

But how your wife feels IS important.
you need to stop feeling like you should defend yourself to us strangers and go show your wife that this is (if it is) inocent.

Oh, and you can stil get yer own name we can tel you off more often then

Original poster
Trio · 28/09/2006 18:21

I told miss trio grudingly as she phoned me at work and was querying it. The girl is sat on the next desk and it;s rude to talk about someone so close. Is it not? - And i'm not being male.. I'm just overwhelmed with the amount of interest people have on this site, with other peoples "so called" problems. Some of you (not all of you), by looking at other threads really are anti-man and are lookng for any excuse for us to make a mistake. Oh and is there a DadsNet?

OP posts:
NotABraBurningOtter · 28/09/2006 18:22
Hmm
AttilaTheMeerkat · 28/09/2006 18:24

Trios Partner

I do not think you should be using Trios name to post for your own self as it may be against the house rules!. I will stand corrected on that but it can get a bit confusing.

You may only see it as a "lift to work" but your lady clearly sees it differently. Why did you only tell her grudgingly?.

Would you honestly have told her at all or would you have left your partner still in ignorance. One lift to work without saying to partner you could perhaps get away with by saying it slipped your mind. Not telling her about this you look like you are withholding information from her.

You would not like it one bit if your partner was giving a man a lift to work every day and you did not know about it. Being in the car does encourage conversation, you are together in an enclosed space.

PcCOD · 28/09/2006 18:25

thsi si odd
go adn talk abtou it alone

sleepfinder · 28/09/2006 18:25

this is hilarious....

PcCOD · 28/09/2006 18:25

weirdos

Rowlers · 28/09/2006 18:26
Hmm
Original poster
Trio · 28/09/2006 18:27

Its onnly been the one lift lol - and by any chance have any of you been cheated on by your partners in a car??? Cos this is getting out of hand... enclosed space lol

OP posts:
Rowlers · 28/09/2006 18:29

stop posting then

hub2dee · 28/09/2006 18:30

I think (but might be wrong) that Trio is under the impression it's been daily for several weeks... perhaps this is just a misunderstanding ?

TheBlonde · 28/09/2006 18:30

MsTrio OP: "he has been picking her and giving her a lift ever since!"

Is this whole thread a pisstake??

treacletart · 28/09/2006 18:30

Seriously, I'm not a man hater - nor do I believe are many mumsnetters - what you have here is a privilleged insight into how I sincerely believe the majority of people would feel in your wife's situation and more importantly, an eloquent summary of your wife's feelings to boot. Stop slagging people off and start making your wife feel special again. An apology, dinner and a foot rub might be good starting points.

prettymum · 28/09/2006 18:33

sometimes its actually good to speak tp your dp about any issues or doubts you have before jumping to conclusions!! ive been there and i ended up looking like a fool!

risingsun · 28/09/2006 18:33

Mr Trio-this young girl has only just started at your workplace a few weeks ago.She must have thought about travel arrangements when she took the job.
How was she planning on getting to work if you had not offered to give her a lift.

Also by your own admission on here "yes she's a female,yes she's pretty"
would hardly do your partners self esteem a lot of good to hear you admit that.

fattiemumma · 28/09/2006 18:33

dunno about a dasnet but there is a mens room here and we do have a few guys who are pretty regular.
I must say that its unfair to say

just overwhelmed with the amount of interest people have on this site, with other peoples "so called" problems

your wife posted an asked for advice/support and words of encouragment.
i dont think anyone on here hates men, in fact that majority of the members here are happily married.

But as i imagine men do, when a woman comes on and says she has been upset by her hubby the first response is "tosser" (i would imagine the male convo equivelant is "she must be on")

You can't walk into a womans world and then whinge when we are sat around talking like women now can you?
I owuldnt walk into a rugby club and tell them to stop swearing or scracthing their balls....i would accept that its a male environment and either put up or shut up.

PcCOD · 28/09/2006 18:34

lolol at yoiu odd balls tyoing away when you are next to each other

Original poster
Trio · 28/09/2006 18:37

No I assure you this is not a pisstake - its just a great case of crossed wires, and how something so small can blow up into somthing so big.. I am sure my partner can handle other pretty women, as I have to put up with other pretty men.. or should I avert my eyes and say 50 hail mary's?? My point is not that I am in the right - which I know i'm not.. it's just created so much enjoyment for myself (for the last half and hour or so) and I thank you all :-) I'm now off for my tea with my partner and my 3 beautiful children. I suggest you all do the same.. Thank you

OP posts: