Text message meant for someone else?

[springchickennolonger]

Looked at my phone this morning. Found a text message from Dp which was obviously not meant for me. It's incriminating -to another woman- but I don't want to draw any conclusions until I'm sure it's from his phone.

Is there any way it could be from somewhere else?

I'm a bit shocked tbh and not sure what to do.

My gut feeling is to gather more evidence before confronting him. Any advice?

Thanks.

If it says it was from his phone, then it was from his phone.

Will he not realise when he looks at his sent messages? He's probably deleting other messages now.

OP am sorry this has happened, you must be very shocked.
As pp said, if it says it was from his phone then I'm not sure if there is any way it came from somewhere else. Not a tech expert but I don't think that's possible?
Have you been together long? Do you have any other suspicions of him?

It's definitely from his phone, but (grasping at straws for you here, OP) could someone else have had access to his phone to send it?

It was from your husband op

What does it say that tells you it's meant for someone other than you?

You've got an incriminating misdirected message and if it says it came from his phone, it came from his phone.... you don't need more 'evidence'. Suggest you confront him and - if you want the advice of an old-timer - crack on that you know more than you do.

yes that's a good question leviticus, does it have a name in that isn't yours? anyone you are able to identify (eg a colleague of your DP's)?

Are you sure it wasn't meant for you? And could it be a flirty text he meant to send to a male friend? My DP does that.

Are you both still at home or left for work?

What does it actually say and how do you know it was him that sent it and that it wasn't someone else using his phone? You're jumping to conclusions very quickly and panicking. It might be a silly mistake or someone playing a prank on you

MyEmpire - DP and his friends are.definitely not gay, they wind each other up all the time.

OP, what exactly did the text say, are you quite sure it's for another woman?

Thanks all. This is what it says:

"Hi honey hows your cat? Hope all ok. I worked til 7.30 then watched tv with. Day better today...wish had been meeting you tonite though. Miss you xxx"

That's it, bad grammar and all. It was written last night at 23.10. He was home, downstairs.

Unfortunately it sounds like you have all the evidence you need.

It's quite easy to misdirect a text message.

It is highly improbable - maybe even technically impossible - is that it didn't come from his phone.

The simplest explanation is usually the right one.

Sorry OP x post.

Yes unfortunately you have everything you need to know right there.

So sorry

Phones...do people really leave their phones around. My ex carried his around everywhere like a baby?

Mine is usually in my bag.

Hubs keeps his in a case on his belt. Course these are little phones. Not the big tablet type phones.

What I'm wondering to put OP mind at rest is are people really in the habit of leaving their possessions just lying around???

Its pretty clear cut, sorry.

OP, I am far from an expert in these things (unlike many on here, sadly) but I don't think this looks good tbh. Does he have a close female friend this could have been sent (platonically?) to? Though I'm not sure it's very platonic-sounding at all, albeit that it's not actually sexual in nature. I do agree that often the simplest explanation, even if the most shocking and most impossible-seeming, is the likeliest one.
Can you talk to anyone in RL? Are you at home today? Work?
I don't think you can leave this un-confronted, no matter what it might mean.

That is very damning. If it was only the two of you in the house and he actually has his phone there's no other explanation than he sent it.

You have that message. Ask him who it was for.

Oh heck!

We must have posted at the same time.

Right cool head on now. Don't get angry, get even. Start getting your finances in a row. Just in case.

Sounds like someone has broken the trust.

Yes you want to smash him into smithereens but think of the big picture . Can you check joint bank statements.

Keep cool. Get your evidence together..

It might be innocent, but I would get all my ducks in a row first!

If he has an iphone type phone chances are he has probably realised anyway....

Reply to it:
"We don't have a cat, why are you telling me you watched tv with me? You did meet me last night, we sat home and watched tv. Thanks for missing me though xxx".

You'll have to confront him. See what he says.

You don't need any more evidence.

Don't fall into the trap of trying to put off the inevitable or persuade yourself that until you have 'more evidence' 'proper evidence', then you shouldn't confront him, might not be what you think, etc.

You're just kidding yourself if you do that - because a part of your mind will think 'He'll explain it away, I won't actually get any more evidence... and then I can tell myself it's inconclusive and shut my eyes, we can carry on...'

It's there in black and white.

How long have you been together?
Do you have children?

If the answer to 2 is no, then I wouldn't even have a discussion about it, I would simply pack his bags today.

If yes, then I'd still pack his bags as the most effective way to shock a confession and some straight talking out of him would be to hit him so hard with an 'it's over' that he tells you everything you want to know.

You really don't need anything more than that op. I'm so sorry.