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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Help me NOT send this text!

183 replies

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 16:36

Cherchez l'homme. Of course, it's about a man.

I met him April, we got to know each other slowly. I realised I liked him, and that he was a patient, good humoured, clever, creative person, who cared about thinngs. We tentatively discovered we both liked each other. We have been on two dates, that's all, but they were a full week apart because I was away in between. He was supposed to be coming over to my house later, and I sent a text to suggest a time. I realise I haven't heard from him since early monday morning. Just after midnight Sunday I mean. Now I'm sitting on my hands. I'm quite mumsnet savvy. I recognise the red flags. I recognise a player and a narc. I thought this guy was lovely. He seemed to like me back. We were actually chatting (and I know you can't count on beer-talk) about the near future iyswim.

Help me not to send a sarky "?" by text now. My house is clean on the plus side. I'm going to go and get a bottle of wine, for mySELF. Whether he comes or not.

OP posts:
HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:14

I havent sent anything.... i think im too upset and confused. Id say something snippy.

But im shocked. I didnt think he was like this. I thought we'd got to know/ respect each other well enough that if he wanted to back out he'd tell me.

God. Men. Are they worth it?

OP posts:
HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:15

No sonjadog. Nothing. Not even "listen i am so sorry etc...."

OP posts:
sonjadog · 19/08/2014 19:16

So not turned up then...

When was he due? Are you sure he couldn't have misunderstood the invite?

BOFster · 19/08/2014 19:18

What time did you suggest?

StaringBlankly · 19/08/2014 19:18

Bastard. What time was he due?

The fade out is so cowardly, how hard is it to send a text?!

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:18

I just had a twxt from a pizzaria reminding me of their mid week specials

:-(

OP posts:
Fleecydressinggown · 19/08/2014 19:19

Delete his number immediately from your phone and all texts between you. Then you can't text him. It takes the choice out of your hands.

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:19

Staringblankly. Due @ 8pm

But i cant expect him now can i, not having had a reply to the last two texts.

OP posts:
HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:20

Fleecy, im not ready for that. I thought he was lovely. I really did.

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StaringBlankly · 19/08/2014 19:20

He might just be crap with his phone, has he previously replied to every message?

googoodolly · 19/08/2014 19:22

What time was he meant to show up? It's so shitty when people do this - someone did it to me when I was 17 and I've never forgotten it!

BOFster · 19/08/2014 19:22

Hmm. Two texts? What was the other one? He might still show, I suppose, but he's an idiot because you'll have a cob on with him now even if he does.

sonjadog · 19/08/2014 19:22

You're in the UK? So he hasn't definitely not turned up yet...

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:24

Ive only lost two dates yes , but i really let my heart off the lead. Foolish foolish.

OP posts:
HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:24

Correct sonjadog! 19:24

OP posts:
SnakeyMcBadass · 19/08/2014 19:25

But it's not 8 yet. Am I missing something?

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:27

Bof? I sent one yesterday lunch time that didnt require an answer. Then this mrning i sent amother. I am reading back texts. If he misunderstood id be surprised. .....

OP posts:
NamesNick · 19/08/2014 19:27

dont text until after the expected time. if at all.

no one is that silly. to just not turn up and say nothing. especially if you work together.

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:27

Thanks yall.....

OP posts:
StaringBlankly · 19/08/2014 19:27

"Delete his number immediately from your phone and all texts between you. Then you can't text him. It takes the choice out of your hands"

If he doesn't turn up, do that ^ I should have done that months ago when I realised I was being messed around, instead I hung on getting more and more attached until he finally buggered off, now I'm heart broken murderous Angry Grin

sonjadog · 19/08/2014 19:29

Did this morning's text refer to dinner?

BOFster · 19/08/2014 19:29

He really should have replied then. I think I'd be tempted to take myself out to the pictures or something.

wobblywilma · 19/08/2014 19:30

If youre in the UK then theres still.time! I thought.id been stood up recently too.under similar circumstances. I resisted texting until.he was half hour late and he replied saying he was 5 mins away :) . (this particular guy has been late every time Ive met him, its shitty but Ive 'made a joke' to him about his tardiness). Let us know what happens!

HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:31

It referred to it, but he already knew.

OP posts:
HelpMeSitOnMyHands · 19/08/2014 19:32

I will, ill update regardless. I wont cry in to a pot noodle alone. Ill have a glass of wine with my half of dinner!

OP posts: